james 1.2f says, 'my brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. but let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing' yesterday had a temptation/trial...satan rooting for me to dishonor God and God hoping i will show Him thru how i live. yesterday satan 'won'. i say 'won' rather than won because his 'victories' are really not victories but stepping stones to greater victory and honor for the Lord. i was in a work situation with several other individuals where they were demonstrating great ability in various areas such as building, etc. i, by contrast, was demonstrating an almost total lack of ability in the same areas..as is my usual position in regard to these things. while they were installing a floor in great triumph i muddled one ridiculously easy thing after another. first the riding mower i was on went dead. i was sent for gas and to pick up lunch. upon returning and filling the tank i found the mower would not start. jump the battery, of course. i don't know who to jump a battery (as usual, i forgot the spirit that has often helped me of 'i can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me'. so...well, go week wack. blame it all, of course, i can't get the thing started. with someone leaving their post the thing is running. after lunch they jumped the mower. so that's complete. i come in dreading what's next. if only i could shine like, in my own mind i had shown many times before. PRIDING MYSELF in outworking others. but no, the Lord had me in a time of testing, satan in a time of temptation.. the job was to fix up some little place in the existing flooring. i proceeded to take the rest of the afternoon to do it! on top of it all i committed a common sin in not doing a task in the way i am instructed to do it. i had my reasons!! the one who gave me the job gently chided me for taking a lot longer than need be, to which i responded with MY REASONS for not doing as instructed. he said no more. in my pride i wound not go to them AGAIN (oh here comes the idiot, who can't do anything) and further fall in their eyes and my own. pride! from time to time they would be making jocular work-a-day type remarks but i was in no humor for joking and i became increasingly silent and morose...the world's smallest package, someone tied up in themselves. this a.m. God graciously met me and showed me all my sin and more graciously enabled me to see myself and repent. oh blessed, patient Lord He is.
well, today, being sunday went to mision evangelica and there was melted before him and the brethren. have been praying for His love to fill my heart. yesterday there was none. this a.m. was a taste and God sweetly gave me some degree of fellowship with the saints.
i wear this cross, just like wear out each article of clothing. these are several of the many 'badges of spirituality' that cling to me like so much pus. at least this is the impression that is growing upon me. the same thing can be done by different people or be the same person with totally different motivations. the things are not sin or sinless in themselves but rather become either/or based upon the focus. is a thing truly done from the heart for God or for myself. i have the increasing impression that there is a lot of 'me' in things that are ostensibly done for the Lord. another that just comes to mind is the practice of asking people how i can pray for them. when it's of the Lord, no matter how it is received or what happens there is a deep reassurance and peace in the spirit that this is the way in which i am to walk. thank You Lord for the victory each of Your own has in Jesus Christ alone. help me not to be anyway that does not reflect You.
concerning the growing bump on my neck i believe two things were shown me. the string of the cross around my neck never having been washed in some 3-4 years of constant wearing..many times in filthy, dirty situations may be the direct reason for the bump. i took it off and have not worn it for a week or more. the thot to try and dislodge the black 'dot' which headed the bump ought to be removed by proding with a needle and it should be soaked in epsom salts.reading.. i've done this three times so far and the bump has decreased greatly in size and hardness. thank You Lord. ...so i guess i'm not to die from cancer right now.
thank the Lord for it seems He may have brought me out of nearly 4 months without virtually any work into the land of plenty...we'll see. last two weeks about 60 hours have been logged scraping and painting the nearman's (sp?) house gables. this was totally unexpected. last year had given them an estimate but no response so figured it would not happen. then sandy asked if i were currently painting. no. start in. they seem to be pleased and would like the rest of the house exterior and barn to be painted. one problem. as of 4.22.10, by EPA regulations, any pre-1978 house comes under special requirements. first, the painter must take a course on the removal of lead-based paint and obtain a licence costing $500, not to speak of a day of your life. second, the regulations are daunting from a. extensive testing for the presence of lead-based paint, to b. required use of a respirator, which for me makes breathing hot, difficult and painful (due to the way it fits on the head and c. special clothing d. tarping off the entire area to be scraped in plastic (i am currently working on a 40' high brick structure which is probably 50' long. e. special method of collection and disposal of paint chips...resulting in an astronomical increase in the cost of labor. when i discussed this with sandy after learning that 4.22 was the beginning of a new era in painting she was very disappointed. they were very pleased with the way the gables were going and decided that they would like me to paint more. i told her that this was impossible for i was on the tail-end of painting and that the gables would be the last work i would do on pre-1978 structures. she came back again and as a result, seeing that my commute would now be 0 minutes (they live next door) and that the amount of work would fill out most of the hours of this last year of painting, i said i would check into it further. in calling the local paint store i was filled in on all the things mentioned above...then he said, the only exception is that if you have a contract dated pre-4.22 and signed none of the post requirements apply and there is no time limit for completion of the project. this, i sensed, was God. this was 4.20. on 4.21 sandy (john was away) and i signed...
then at the same time i was called by a very good customer who has given me much work over the 4 years i have been in business with a big project to paint. i had thot i would not hear from them again...
this year has been different. in the last few years, i believe, every single person who spoke to me about painting, i painted for them. this year a number of people have contacted me and only one has had me paint. it almost seems like God was testing me, saying, ' is steve going to start conniving, calling people back, etc. or is he going to wait on Me to provide. i can't take any credit. God has somehow kept me from acting on my own...and now i am once again, with joy, receiving His superabundant supply. in fact His supply is so superabundant that i am trying to connive and figure a way to take advantage of all that has come which may easily turn out to far more than the now 44o some hours of painting i have left until i don't paint anymore. i am really struggling with greed on the one side and a horror of moving to the next step where i must totally trust God to provide physical needs without any help on my own. i have emerged, by God's grace, from famine into a time of seemingly abundant harvest. now the test is to let it go and trust God at the end of 2010's hours. i have has thots of paul working day and night as a man sent by God/maker of tents so that he could take no wages from me as well as provide for the band of men who traved with him in apostolic labor. this has occurred several times in the past year as i look to 1.1.2011. i am praying...keep me from not trusting You alone. bring me to a place of total dependence on You as well as labor with You in Your vineyard. yet i am wondering if painting say 100 hours of so a year might not enable me to' tentmake' while seeking first the kingdom. may God help me to do as He would lead.
reading...
truly exceptional -janie b. cheaney, worldmag,4.24.10, p26 ..God ordained three institutions: the family, the state and the church. with the state encroaching onto territory that should belong to the other two, it's right and proper to resist. that tide has been turned before and it can be again. but 'the king's heart is a stream of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it wherever He will'. prov. 21.1...activists, whether looking to thefjuture or the past, put too much faith in the state. isolationists seek refuge within the family. of all God-ordained institutions, the church is often overlooked - and yet, interestingly, the only one that will last. christians hold dual citizenship and the visible church is the diplomatic outpost for our farther country. not always safe and not always trustworthy, by eternal. in our zeal to redeem the culture, we must not neglect what God has already redeemed'..
worldmag, same issue...'president obama said recently that his commitment to passing comprehensive immigration reform is 'unwavering'...
the above is a perfect example of what happens when a nation departs from God. the president, in the constitution, does not pass any legislation nor does he in any way try to use his position to influence the passing of legislation. that is congress' domain. during bush's years it became more and more apparent that he was regularly passing the line between the executive and the legislative branches of government. because he was allowed to do this by congress, more accurately by the people, he became the template for a morphing of the executive branch into a dictatorial power. the legislative branch has lost their mission to make law in keeping with God's law. the executive branch is rapidly taking over legislative function. the judicial branch has left off making sure that law is in keeping with God's law. all three have failed to support the keeping of law, which is in accordance with God's law, is obeyed by the people. this has come about because we, as a people, have abandoned the fear of God and the keeping of His law. our only hope is i...and the next i....and the next i...start to do exactly what God says to do.
p39 has a picture of a number of young men and women at a native missionary training center in china crying out to God. i gazed at this for a long time with great desire to be in their number, sharing with them the burden of Christ...i went back a number of times with the same result. of course precious Christ is the lover of my soul but 1) i am not a fellowsoldier and 2) have no fellowsoldier. i have hoped to have married one. i have longed to find one. i feel so alone! my heart yearns to be in such a group of people but i know of no one...God keeps saying, endure hardness, go alone, with Me, into the fray. (associated with affray - a public fight)
voice of martyrs, 4.10, p.10...42 martyrs of ammoria - a.s.845..the 42 martyrs of ammoria were all commanders in the army of the byzantine emperor theophilus. when ammoria, located in modern-day turkey, fell to invading arab armies in 838, the muslims killed or sold many of the christians in the city. however, they took 42 ..commanders as hostages to samarra (now iraq) and threw them in prison, where they remained for seven years.
the muslim leaders told their prisoners, 'mohammed is the true prophet and not Christ'. the commanders replied, 'if there were two men debating about a field and the one said, 'this field is mine" and the other, "it is not, it is mine", and nearby one of them had many witnesses saying it is his field and the other had no witnesses, but only himself, what would you say - whose field is it?'
the muslims answered, 'indeed, to him who had many witnesses!' "you have judged correctly', the commanders said. 'that is the way with Christ and mohammed. Christ has many witnesses: the prophets of old, from moses to john the forerunner, who you also recognize and who witness to and about Him (Christ), but mohammed witnesses only to himself that he is a prophet and does not have even one witness'.
ashamed, the muslims said, 'our faith is better than the christian faith as proved by this: God gave us the victory over you and gave us the best land in the world and a kingdom much greater than christianity'.
in reply, the commanders said, 'if it were so, then the idolatry of the egyptians, babylonians, hellenes, romans and the fire-worship of the persians would be the true faith for , at one time, all of these people conquered the others and ruled over them. it is evident that your victory, power and wealth do not proved the truth of your faith. we know that God, at times, gives victory to Christians and, at other times, allows torture and suffering so as to correct them and to bring them to repentance and purification of their sins'.
for seven years, the 42 commanders were entreated to embrace the islamic faith, but they never acquiesced. they were finally beheaded in the year 845 their bodies were thrown into the euphrates river.
hope you have a good week. love, dad
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