16 REJOICE ALWAYS
17 PRAY WITHOUT CEASING
18 IN EVERYTHING GIVE THANKS
take it every morning!
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Saturday, November 10, 2012
11.10.2012 POWER VACUUM
when God is not absolutely in control of a person His grace and power cannot operate and the person's life (whether observable outwardly or not by either the person himself or others) is out of control.
the same principle happens in this world system. whenever there is a world power, whether one or several countries, there is relative peace (witness, for one of many examples, the famous pax romana (roman peace) that went on for two centuries or so during the height of the power of the roman empire). but if a world power, retaining the name only, starts to wane, the world is plunged into increasing chaos. i learned this many years ago as a political science student. i sense this happening now. all indications seem to indicate that the political hegemony
(leadership, predominance..from hegemon-a leading or paramount power)
of the united states is vanishing. the reasons in our case are spelled out in deuteronomy 28. God also elevates evil nations to punish other nations for their evil (isaiah 13.1-5 speaks of the situation of babylon destroying judah) and then destroys the destroyers (isaiah 13.17-22;14.1;4-7).
the arab spring with the faux democracies
(they have not a clue that to be a nation of free people is only accomplished by having people who are free to obey God (john 8.32,36) not free to do what they want)
is one of many indications of this.
every recognized freedom must have its roots in this fundamental freedom that comes through submission in our lives to Jesus and His word. and like thoreau learned that even though he was in prison, it was really he that was free and everyone on the outside that was not.
we as a nation are no longer obeying God so all our nationally enjoyed freedoms (freedom of speech, freedom of the press, freedom from faulty imprisonment and autocratic sentence, freedom of self defense and freedom for the practice of religion are, and de facto, must evaporate away.
THE GOOD NEWS IS that this all according to God's word and that He, throughout the world, is establishing His kingdom secretly (Jesus speaks of His kingdom as like leaven which a woman took and hid in three pecks (Matthew 13.33)
(peck equals 2 gallons)
of meal until it was all leavened (that's when King Jesus comes back to take control in person!). He is creating little pockets of absolute allegiance to Himself in the midst of a sea of human angst, fear, anxiety and woe untold.
'but the wicked are like the tossing sea, for it cannot be quiet, and its waters toss up refuse and mud. there is no peace, says my God, for the wicked. isaiah 57.21f
these pockets are individuals who are free to do what Jesus tells them in the word...and nothing else. every individual like this is an island of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and controlled Self. galatians 5.22 they cannot disobey Jesus and are prepared to suffer anything on account of Him. such a person knows that they live in hell now. this life is the place where only one thing of importance happens..every time they obey Jesus. heaven is a sweet expectation..soon...increasingly sweet in accordance to what they suffer here. whenever they suffer on account of Jesus they sing and dance with rejoicing in their hearts...for they know that when this happens they have been accounted worthy of suffering WITH Jesus and will have great reward in heaven.
'blessed are you when men cast insults at you and persecute you and say all kinds of evil against you falsely, on account of Me. rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great, for so they persecuted the PROPHETS who were before you. matthew 5.11-2 (..and there are no SILENT prophets. every free person speaks the word of God openly.)
the same principle happens in this world system. whenever there is a world power, whether one or several countries, there is relative peace (witness, for one of many examples, the famous pax romana (roman peace) that went on for two centuries or so during the height of the power of the roman empire). but if a world power, retaining the name only, starts to wane, the world is plunged into increasing chaos. i learned this many years ago as a political science student. i sense this happening now. all indications seem to indicate that the political hegemony
(leadership, predominance..from hegemon-a leading or paramount power)
of the united states is vanishing. the reasons in our case are spelled out in deuteronomy 28. God also elevates evil nations to punish other nations for their evil (isaiah 13.1-5 speaks of the situation of babylon destroying judah) and then destroys the destroyers (isaiah 13.17-22;14.1;4-7).
the arab spring with the faux democracies
(they have not a clue that to be a nation of free people is only accomplished by having people who are free to obey God (john 8.32,36) not free to do what they want)
is one of many indications of this.
every recognized freedom must have its roots in this fundamental freedom that comes through submission in our lives to Jesus and His word. and like thoreau learned that even though he was in prison, it was really he that was free and everyone on the outside that was not.
we as a nation are no longer obeying God so all our nationally enjoyed freedoms (freedom of speech, freedom of the press, freedom from faulty imprisonment and autocratic sentence, freedom of self defense and freedom for the practice of religion are, and de facto, must evaporate away.
THE GOOD NEWS IS that this all according to God's word and that He, throughout the world, is establishing His kingdom secretly (Jesus speaks of His kingdom as like leaven which a woman took and hid in three pecks (Matthew 13.33)
(peck equals 2 gallons)
of meal until it was all leavened (that's when King Jesus comes back to take control in person!). He is creating little pockets of absolute allegiance to Himself in the midst of a sea of human angst, fear, anxiety and woe untold.
'but the wicked are like the tossing sea, for it cannot be quiet, and its waters toss up refuse and mud. there is no peace, says my God, for the wicked. isaiah 57.21f
these pockets are individuals who are free to do what Jesus tells them in the word...and nothing else. every individual like this is an island of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and controlled Self. galatians 5.22 they cannot disobey Jesus and are prepared to suffer anything on account of Him. such a person knows that they live in hell now. this life is the place where only one thing of importance happens..every time they obey Jesus. heaven is a sweet expectation..soon...increasingly sweet in accordance to what they suffer here. whenever they suffer on account of Jesus they sing and dance with rejoicing in their hearts...for they know that when this happens they have been accounted worthy of suffering WITH Jesus and will have great reward in heaven.
'blessed are you when men cast insults at you and persecute you and say all kinds of evil against you falsely, on account of Me. rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great, for so they persecuted the PROPHETS who were before you. matthew 5.11-2 (..and there are no SILENT prophets. every free person speaks the word of God openly.)
Friday, November 9, 2012
11.9.2012 CONSECRATION III
comment in journal on 11.1 in reflection of entry in prayer journal 10.28..
i am learning that when i allow something i know to be wrong in my life it opens the door to sin multiplying and dominating. God pretty clearly was letting me know He wanted me to give myself completely to Him. i would not do this. there were too many 'non-sinful' things in my life that i enjoyed and did not want to give up. hence the following scenario unfolded over the better part of a year's time in my life..
regarding my addictive behavior:
beginning in earnest during 2011
the year i originally thought would be the first 'full time service to the Lord '
...which would continue for the rest of my life
(the year the Lord spoke to me about giving everything to Him..of consecrating myself fully to Him)
rejecting that
(too high a price!)
i subconsciously sought my meaning in
sports (rather than in God)
which then,
without me consciously realizing it,
took (maybe 'demanded' is a better word)
progressively larger chunks,
not only of my time
but my mind
and my affections,
it grew from tv (at first sports, then they got me watching movies i secretly abominated...i was somehow able to not allow this to continue)
to christian magazines (only two, but i HAD to read them)..
to newspapers and then
secular news magazines (a growing number)..
to addictive tv..
to radio..
to addictive radio (i still can almost 'smell' the disgusting way in which the sports 'talk radio' would savage, one after another, human beings playing a game and trying to do their best...absolutely repulsive in my heart but i had to keep getting more and more sports info and that was the only way..that is the point where i knew i was truly addicted) and the growing sports mania which fed them...which was encroaching more and more upon my life to the point of a subtle, insidious (is it not always so in) addiction.
at this time i began to pray
to cry out for help and deliverance
and the Lord took all of it away
john 7.17 says ,
'if any man is WILLING to do His will, he shall know of the teaching, whether it is of God...'
God brought me to the point where i was willing. when He completely took it away, i knew it was Him and not me. i had absolutely no power to stop. then i simply stopped..it all...without any effort, angst or longing. that's when You know it is a work of God.
when a thing is of God there is great power. all the above, which had such a hold on my life for that time, completely left that day...leaving only the two christian magazines in a non-addictive way. i only have one word to say.
HALLELUJAH. i thank You for setting me free Lord.
..quoting from my journal of
11.1...'the Lord took away (what is noted above) in june 2012.
is He now moving me to ? i don't know yet. but i sense the same power as i experienced in what is related above..
1. get up at 4 a.m. EVERY MORNING
2. RUN every other day.
3. quiet time (one hour divided between prayer and reading through the bible in a year)
4. breakfast (1 hour)
5. NEXT work hard at one of the following for 8 hours (40 hour MAX per week)
-is there anyone who You are leading me to help?
-if not, is there any work for pay to do right now?
-if neither of the above, work at 54 (my house) with the goal of establishing a clean, maintained, orderly home ASAP.
6. BE ALERT TO wasting time.
7. after 5 pm is for the Lord. (right now being alone with the Lord seems of utmost importance...forget about running around to church gatherings or of purely self interest with no edification in the Lord. forget about being with people other than for the purpose of exhortation (hebrews 3.13-4), prayer, the word, mutual sharing/examining of current spiritual state (acts 2.42) or sharing the gospel of the kingdom (mk. 16.15).
8. no book reading over .5 hour a day....and m a y b e more extensive on the sixth day of the week (this, at this time, seems mixed in my heart...it is a bit doubtful for it easily can become an idol for me...but great good has come to me spiritually thereby. so this standard along with the cry for constant spiritual awareness and discernment...)
9. abstinence from any food (ie. ice cream is the worse temptation) eaten for taste or any other reason but to gain strength. (ecclessiastes 10.17)
10. continue to move away from anything like intimacy with any woman, young or old, especially those i deem 'spiritual'. (i see more and more the wisdom in a complete, yet not an unnatural or 'weird' separation of the sexes...especially in spiritual matters and matters of the heart. they are still friends but now there is a plexiglass wall between.)
i always thought consecration was once and for all event. my father claimed a second work of grace in which he experienced a once for all filling of the Holy Spirit. i disagreed with his belief, with john wesley, that this included an end to all WILLFUL sin. i can line up passages in the bible on my side...but i still wonder. he had many things about his life that i am hard pressed to find another explanation for. we were always estranged due to my (now clearly seen, then unconscious of) arrogant pride and wickedness, but at heart, even then, i admired his character traits (fruit of the Spirit?) and the way he lived his life. he's already forgiven me..just like my heavenly Father.
i still ponder entire sanctification claimed by my father and many others in church history. i could not say i have any experience such as they report and can be seen in their lives. i am an odd duck. my salvation experience is anything but what might be called simple and normative...yet i KNOW He lives within me..i KNOW the sweet fellowship, the forgiveness of sins, the comfort, the guidance and counsel...and that He will never desert me...but, no matter what happens, will bring me, through the shed blood of Jesus Christ His Son...to Himself at last.
just as salvation has been piecemeal and chaotic, so seems sanctification in my life. right now He is winnowing out of my life all the shit that is in me...but i think it impossible for Him to ever use me in His service until He gives me the heart transplant spoken of in ezekiel 36...until He fills me with His love for people....until He lets me see them as He does.
back to journal..
11.5..'great spiritual struggle in my life'...these words come to mind from the account of when God established His covenant with abraham..'now when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon abram and behold TERROR and GREAT DARKNESS fell upon him'..genesis 15.12. the capitalized words although not exactly matching my experience they are similar and connotative of what i am going through these last few days. something funky is going on. i am experiencing a sort of darkness, confusion, a haze, very weak and flacid prayer, temptation to 'give up' (doing what God seems to be leading me to do (ie. list above)...myriad, strong accusations, drugged-like sleep for long periods of time with no discernable normal reason..
..just shared this with nate (our oldest son) over the phone and asked prayer..immediately have a very real sense of 'lightening' of the general oppression.
...this last causes me to reflect that God has so moved in my life that i am in a position of being quite profoundly alone:
1. i have been moved out of the relatively warm and comfortable leidy church family
2. my 'calling' to speak the truth in love (ephesians 4.15) has almost uniformly lost me relationships. maybe i am doing so in a strictly literal manner when the proper way to do so sounds very different...i just don't know. i just keep looking at what Jesus said (but how, what manner, with what kind of spirit did He do it?! i'm sure it wasn't sweet and syrupy or 'nice'..he said it and they wanted to destroy him...oh Lord it is probably because i don't love people like You! please show me, change me, fill me with You so it comes across the way it did from You..help me please!
3. my time at mision evangelica has turned out not at all the way i might have expected. it seems, in a weird way, that i am like frozen in glass..i'm not real..i still totally freeze up when spoken to or trying to speak (and yet i can praise and pray somewhat freely in spanish...this makes friendship difficult to impossible. most of all real fellowship is not possible. the result is despite some real degree of a surface type of friendliness i still view myself, and probably viewed, as an outsider. may God humble me and give me the boldness to
-stay attached, hang around, hang out, look stupid, talk stupid, make mistakes...but 'be among'..why does this frighten me so, Lord?
maybe their relative aloofness is a mirror image of my own toward them. o Lord have pity on me and help.
4. i have lessening time and interest in talking about the things of the world that everyone talks of and that propensity is growing.
5. i seem to meet or know few people who seem concerned enough about their relationship with Christ..few who seem aware (concerned?) about their great sinfulness and constant failure to be who He saved them to be. (am i the only 'crazy' who struggles against all this? ..the bible, especially Jesus' words are pointed painfully to all different kinds of things amiss!! this experience is a great and growing horror to me as i would think that this would be what MARKED true church fellowship or what those in it were constantly focused on.
6. i know i do not have a genuine love for people...the kind described by Jesus and the word generally. this is probably the cause of a break on my side. i probably have all kinds of wickedness (ie. pride etc) which keeps people away. (it may be a cop out but i see Jesus as profoundly alone, even among His closeset disciples...they seem light years away...such as the time right after He told them (again) of His imminent suffering and death when they were arguing about who was the greatest among them! or, worse, asking preferment in heaven!! not a scintilla of even understanding let alone concern for what He said, what He was about to face..all alone. therefore it is easy for this bad boy to rationalize self-unseen wickedness within the thought 'i'm alone for the same reasons Jesus was!!!! just another example of unbelievable human rationalization.
7. in the past several years God has been revealing my subconscious self. one of the most astounding areas is my hatred for other people. within this year He has given me Jesus' commands in luke 6.27-8;36-8 to 'meditate-pray whenever i am overcome with a spasm of hatred for someone. it has already been used by Him to start making real change in the way i view people. i use them as them as the 'bones' of prayer for individuals who rise in my mind as, hated, for whatever sin i am ascribing to them currently, grows. i find them a real 'spiritual cure' of sorts for hatred and judgmentalism. i find that these sins of mine in reaction to their sins are therby evaporated and not only that but i actually am experiencing a degree of heart change, attitude chang and 'what i do in reference to them' change...which is encouraging..
while this has been good for me, a help and a blessing from god, it has made me relize that this may be the common state of the old nature in everyone (either subconsciously or consciously) and has taken a good bit of my rather naive and rosy view of human nature.
when i think of this my mind can go to john 2.23b-25
('...many believed in His name, beholding His signs which He was doing. but Jesus, on His part, was not entrusting Himself to them, for He knew all me, and because He..knew what was in man'.)
and become a 'proof text' for 'distance' from people.
but no sooner do i seek rationaliztion for my own aloofness than i am reminded of God's love, the love that caused Him to give Himslef to die a horrible death, though personally Innocent, for men who are 'helpless', 'ungodly', 'sinners', 'enemies' (romans 5.6-11).. i see His tender heart in isaiah 15.5a; 16.9,11 toward men who He is destroying..and i say,
you are not like God if you protect yourslef against the worst of men. and back to luke 6 the mind goes..'love your enemies'..
as larry norman sings, '..you may be a righteous rocker or a holy roller...you can be most anything...but you ain't nothin' without love.
consecrate me Lord. help me to give up all for You...but if i don't have Your love 'i ain't nothin'.
i am learning that when i allow something i know to be wrong in my life it opens the door to sin multiplying and dominating. God pretty clearly was letting me know He wanted me to give myself completely to Him. i would not do this. there were too many 'non-sinful' things in my life that i enjoyed and did not want to give up. hence the following scenario unfolded over the better part of a year's time in my life..
regarding my addictive behavior:
beginning in earnest during 2011
the year i originally thought would be the first 'full time service to the Lord '
...which would continue for the rest of my life
(the year the Lord spoke to me about giving everything to Him..of consecrating myself fully to Him)
rejecting that
(too high a price!)
i subconsciously sought my meaning in
sports (rather than in God)
which then,
without me consciously realizing it,
took (maybe 'demanded' is a better word)
progressively larger chunks,
not only of my time
but my mind
and my affections,
it grew from tv (at first sports, then they got me watching movies i secretly abominated...i was somehow able to not allow this to continue)
to christian magazines (only two, but i HAD to read them)..
to newspapers and then
secular news magazines (a growing number)..
to addictive tv..
to radio..
to addictive radio (i still can almost 'smell' the disgusting way in which the sports 'talk radio' would savage, one after another, human beings playing a game and trying to do their best...absolutely repulsive in my heart but i had to keep getting more and more sports info and that was the only way..that is the point where i knew i was truly addicted) and the growing sports mania which fed them...which was encroaching more and more upon my life to the point of a subtle, insidious (is it not always so in) addiction.
at this time i began to pray
to cry out for help and deliverance
and the Lord took all of it away
john 7.17 says ,
'if any man is WILLING to do His will, he shall know of the teaching, whether it is of God...'
God brought me to the point where i was willing. when He completely took it away, i knew it was Him and not me. i had absolutely no power to stop. then i simply stopped..it all...without any effort, angst or longing. that's when You know it is a work of God.
when a thing is of God there is great power. all the above, which had such a hold on my life for that time, completely left that day...leaving only the two christian magazines in a non-addictive way. i only have one word to say.
HALLELUJAH. i thank You for setting me free Lord.
..quoting from my journal of
11.1...'the Lord took away (what is noted above) in june 2012.
is He now moving me to ? i don't know yet. but i sense the same power as i experienced in what is related above..
1. get up at 4 a.m. EVERY MORNING
2. RUN every other day.
3. quiet time (one hour divided between prayer and reading through the bible in a year)
4. breakfast (1 hour)
5. NEXT work hard at one of the following for 8 hours (40 hour MAX per week)
-is there anyone who You are leading me to help?
-if not, is there any work for pay to do right now?
-if neither of the above, work at 54 (my house) with the goal of establishing a clean, maintained, orderly home ASAP.
6. BE ALERT TO wasting time.
7. after 5 pm is for the Lord. (right now being alone with the Lord seems of utmost importance...forget about running around to church gatherings or of purely self interest with no edification in the Lord. forget about being with people other than for the purpose of exhortation (hebrews 3.13-4), prayer, the word, mutual sharing/examining of current spiritual state (acts 2.42) or sharing the gospel of the kingdom (mk. 16.15).
8. no book reading over .5 hour a day....and m a y b e more extensive on the sixth day of the week (this, at this time, seems mixed in my heart...it is a bit doubtful for it easily can become an idol for me...but great good has come to me spiritually thereby. so this standard along with the cry for constant spiritual awareness and discernment...)
9. abstinence from any food (ie. ice cream is the worse temptation) eaten for taste or any other reason but to gain strength. (ecclessiastes 10.17)
10. continue to move away from anything like intimacy with any woman, young or old, especially those i deem 'spiritual'. (i see more and more the wisdom in a complete, yet not an unnatural or 'weird' separation of the sexes...especially in spiritual matters and matters of the heart. they are still friends but now there is a plexiglass wall between.)
i always thought consecration was once and for all event. my father claimed a second work of grace in which he experienced a once for all filling of the Holy Spirit. i disagreed with his belief, with john wesley, that this included an end to all WILLFUL sin. i can line up passages in the bible on my side...but i still wonder. he had many things about his life that i am hard pressed to find another explanation for. we were always estranged due to my (now clearly seen, then unconscious of) arrogant pride and wickedness, but at heart, even then, i admired his character traits (fruit of the Spirit?) and the way he lived his life. he's already forgiven me..just like my heavenly Father.
i still ponder entire sanctification claimed by my father and many others in church history. i could not say i have any experience such as they report and can be seen in their lives. i am an odd duck. my salvation experience is anything but what might be called simple and normative...yet i KNOW He lives within me..i KNOW the sweet fellowship, the forgiveness of sins, the comfort, the guidance and counsel...and that He will never desert me...but, no matter what happens, will bring me, through the shed blood of Jesus Christ His Son...to Himself at last.
just as salvation has been piecemeal and chaotic, so seems sanctification in my life. right now He is winnowing out of my life all the shit that is in me...but i think it impossible for Him to ever use me in His service until He gives me the heart transplant spoken of in ezekiel 36...until He fills me with His love for people....until He lets me see them as He does.
back to journal..
11.5..'great spiritual struggle in my life'...these words come to mind from the account of when God established His covenant with abraham..'now when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon abram and behold TERROR and GREAT DARKNESS fell upon him'..genesis 15.12. the capitalized words although not exactly matching my experience they are similar and connotative of what i am going through these last few days. something funky is going on. i am experiencing a sort of darkness, confusion, a haze, very weak and flacid prayer, temptation to 'give up' (doing what God seems to be leading me to do (ie. list above)...myriad, strong accusations, drugged-like sleep for long periods of time with no discernable normal reason..
..just shared this with nate (our oldest son) over the phone and asked prayer..immediately have a very real sense of 'lightening' of the general oppression.
...this last causes me to reflect that God has so moved in my life that i am in a position of being quite profoundly alone:
1. i have been moved out of the relatively warm and comfortable leidy church family
2. my 'calling' to speak the truth in love (ephesians 4.15) has almost uniformly lost me relationships. maybe i am doing so in a strictly literal manner when the proper way to do so sounds very different...i just don't know. i just keep looking at what Jesus said (but how, what manner, with what kind of spirit did He do it?! i'm sure it wasn't sweet and syrupy or 'nice'..he said it and they wanted to destroy him...oh Lord it is probably because i don't love people like You! please show me, change me, fill me with You so it comes across the way it did from You..help me please!
3. my time at mision evangelica has turned out not at all the way i might have expected. it seems, in a weird way, that i am like frozen in glass..i'm not real..i still totally freeze up when spoken to or trying to speak (and yet i can praise and pray somewhat freely in spanish...this makes friendship difficult to impossible. most of all real fellowship is not possible. the result is despite some real degree of a surface type of friendliness i still view myself, and probably viewed, as an outsider. may God humble me and give me the boldness to
-stay attached, hang around, hang out, look stupid, talk stupid, make mistakes...but 'be among'..why does this frighten me so, Lord?
maybe their relative aloofness is a mirror image of my own toward them. o Lord have pity on me and help.
4. i have lessening time and interest in talking about the things of the world that everyone talks of and that propensity is growing.
5. i seem to meet or know few people who seem concerned enough about their relationship with Christ..few who seem aware (concerned?) about their great sinfulness and constant failure to be who He saved them to be. (am i the only 'crazy' who struggles against all this? ..the bible, especially Jesus' words are pointed painfully to all different kinds of things amiss!! this experience is a great and growing horror to me as i would think that this would be what MARKED true church fellowship or what those in it were constantly focused on.
6. i know i do not have a genuine love for people...the kind described by Jesus and the word generally. this is probably the cause of a break on my side. i probably have all kinds of wickedness (ie. pride etc) which keeps people away. (it may be a cop out but i see Jesus as profoundly alone, even among His closeset disciples...they seem light years away...such as the time right after He told them (again) of His imminent suffering and death when they were arguing about who was the greatest among them! or, worse, asking preferment in heaven!! not a scintilla of even understanding let alone concern for what He said, what He was about to face..all alone. therefore it is easy for this bad boy to rationalize self-unseen wickedness within the thought 'i'm alone for the same reasons Jesus was!!!! just another example of unbelievable human rationalization.
7. in the past several years God has been revealing my subconscious self. one of the most astounding areas is my hatred for other people. within this year He has given me Jesus' commands in luke 6.27-8;36-8 to 'meditate-pray whenever i am overcome with a spasm of hatred for someone. it has already been used by Him to start making real change in the way i view people. i use them as them as the 'bones' of prayer for individuals who rise in my mind as, hated, for whatever sin i am ascribing to them currently, grows. i find them a real 'spiritual cure' of sorts for hatred and judgmentalism. i find that these sins of mine in reaction to their sins are therby evaporated and not only that but i actually am experiencing a degree of heart change, attitude chang and 'what i do in reference to them' change...which is encouraging..
while this has been good for me, a help and a blessing from god, it has made me relize that this may be the common state of the old nature in everyone (either subconsciously or consciously) and has taken a good bit of my rather naive and rosy view of human nature.
when i think of this my mind can go to john 2.23b-25
('...many believed in His name, beholding His signs which He was doing. but Jesus, on His part, was not entrusting Himself to them, for He knew all me, and because He..knew what was in man'.)
and become a 'proof text' for 'distance' from people.
but no sooner do i seek rationaliztion for my own aloofness than i am reminded of God's love, the love that caused Him to give Himslef to die a horrible death, though personally Innocent, for men who are 'helpless', 'ungodly', 'sinners', 'enemies' (romans 5.6-11).. i see His tender heart in isaiah 15.5a; 16.9,11 toward men who He is destroying..and i say,
you are not like God if you protect yourslef against the worst of men. and back to luke 6 the mind goes..'love your enemies'..
as larry norman sings, '..you may be a righteous rocker or a holy roller...you can be most anything...but you ain't nothin' without love.
consecrate me Lord. help me to give up all for You...but if i don't have Your love 'i ain't nothin'.
11.9.2012 ALLENDER - 'TO BE TOLD' I
i thank the Lord for the local bookmobile and how He seems to have led me there. just picked up the second book by dan allender, ''to be told' 2005. below i share the introduction, 'what's your story?
1.2... everyone has a story. put another way, everyone's life is a story. but most people don't know how to read their life in a way that reveals their story. they miss the deeper meaning in their life, and they have little sense of how God has written their story to reveal Himself and His own story.
if you don't think such things are important, consider a conversation i had recently with a friend who was weighing a career move. he showed me a list of pros and cons. there were an equal number of problems and benefits no matter what he decided-whether he changed jobs or stayed where he was.
'if the list is weighted according to my values and dreams, he observed, it's a dead heat. i might as well flip a coin.
but my friend was overlooking his own story, the one thing that would give him direction in making this decision. he hadn't considered God's authorship of his life. he was aware of god's authority but not of God's ongoing creative work in his life-and in all our lives.
'which choice allows you to live your life most consistently with how God has been writing your life story?, i asked.
my friend had no idea what i was getting at. so i asked him if he'd ever studied his life to see what story, what themes, and what plot God was writing his life to reveal. he still looked at me as if i were from outer space.
'why would i study my life? he asked. i was there as everything happened, so what is there to study?
this is a bright, honest, good man who is sensitive to God. he listens well to his wife's heart and he is intentional about doing the right thing in countless areas of his life-health, finances, time with his kids and spirituality. but he saw no value in reading his own story.
most of us have spent more time studying a map to avoid getting lost on a trip than we have studying our life so we'll know how to proceed into the future. when we're preparing to make significant decisions,
why will we study a stock report but fail to look at our own story?
why will we read various o op-ed pieces to help clarify our views on a controversial topic but ignore our own past, which helped form our most important views?
if we're taking a course, we're willing to study books that bore us to pieces, but we won't take time to review our own life, which holds answers about God and our selves that will thrill us, amaze us and sober us. we read and study a great variety of sources and spend time researching our options in order to live in the right direction. but SELDOM DO WE APPROACH OUR OWN LIFE WITH THE MIND SET OF A STUDENT, EAGER TO LEARN, GAIN INSIGHT AND FIND DIRECTION FOR THE FUTURE.
we habitually push aside the one thing that can clarify not only how we got to where we are today but also where God is leading us tomorrow and beyond. our own life is the thing that most influences and shapes our outlook, our tendencies, our choices and our decisions. it is the force that orients us toward the future, and yet we don't give it a second thought. much less a careful examination. it's time to listen to our own story.
if you stick with me awhile, we'll take a close look at 4 core issues that are of crucial importance to you-even if you don't yet realize it.
first, GOD is not merely the creator of our life. He IS also THE AUTHOR OF OUR LIFE, and HE WRITES EACH PERSON'S LIFE TO REVEAL HIS DIVINE STORY. there never has been nor ever will be another life like mine-or like yours. just as there is only one face and name like mine, so there is only one story like mine. and God writes the story of my life to make something known about Himself, the one who wrote me. the same is true of you. your life and mine not only reveal who we are, but they also help reveal who God is.
second, NEITHER YOUR LIFE NOR MINE IS A SERIES OF RANDOM SCENES THAT PILE UP LIKE SHOES IN A CLOSET. we don't have to clear out old stories to make room for new ones.
BOTH YOUR STORY AND MINE HAVE
UNIQUE CHARACTERS,
SURPRISING TWISTS
CENTRAL THEMES
TENSION AND SUSPENSE, and
DEEP SIGNIFICANCE.
EACH IS AN INTRIGUING TALE AND NEITHER IS FICTION.
our story is truer than any other reality we know, and
EACH OF US MUST DISCOVER THE MEANING OF WHAT GOD HAS WRITTEN AS OUR LIFE STORY.
IN OUR STORY GOD SHOWS US WHAT HE'S UP TO AND
WHAT HE WANTS US TO BE ABOUT.
with the third core issue, things start to get exciting.
WHEN I STUDY AND UNDERSTAND MY LIFE STORY, I CAN THEN JOIN GOD AS A COAUTHOR.
i don't have to settle for merely being a reader of my life;
GO CALLS ME TO BE A WRITER OF MY FUTURE.
He asks me to take the only life i will ever be given and shape it
in the direction He outlines for me. i am to keep writing, moving forward into the plot that god has woven into the sinews of my soul.
and fourth, THERE IS THE NECESSITY AND BLESSING OF TELLING OUR STORY TO OTHERS. to the degree that we know God and then join Him in writing our story, we are honored to join others in the calling of storytelling. God, of course is the master storyteller. His self revelation is captured in a sweeping narrative and then given to us in the book that grips our heart and captures our soul. God also creates a story with each person's life-a story that we are meant to tell.
AND SINCE WE ARE CALLED TO TELL OUR STORY,
WE ARE ALSO CALLED TO LISTEN TO THE STORIES OF OTHERS.
and since we are to tell and to listen, then
EVEN MORE SO WE ARE CALLED TO ENCOURAGE OTHERS
TO KNOW
AND TELL
AND LISTEN TO GOD'S OWN STORY as well as their own.
God is calling us to fully explore, to fully enjoy and to fully capture the power of the great story. one way we do this is by listening to our lesser stories and then telling them to others.
do you ever feel that you're stuck,
just going through the motions,
not hearing from God, and
not feeling any passion about your life?
it's easy to land there if you're not listening to your story.
God writes our story with great passion and desire, and He reveals our own passions and desires as we read and listen to our story. so i was saddened to see my friend about to make a huge life decision without first asking;
WHO AM I?
WHAT ABOUT GOD AM I MOST UNIQUELY SUITED TO REVEAL TO OTHERS?
AND HOW IS THAT MEANING IN MY LIFE BEST LIVED OUT?
my friend wasn't listening to his own story to gain direction for his decision about the future.
i'm grateful the he accepted the counsel of a self-confessed fool and answered a series of questions that i asked him to consider. you will be asked to answer the same questions as you read this book. to answer these simple questions, you must study your own story. you must listen to the heartache and hope that are etched in the narrative of your life. and you must find the meaning God has written there.
i asked my friend to join God in writing the next paragraph and then the next page of the story that is his life. i'm asking you to do the same. allow others to read and edit and critique and join in the glory of the great story God is telling through you.
YOUR STORY HELPS REVEAL THE GREATEST STORY,
THE STORY THAT GOD IS TELLING ABOUT HIMSELF.
GOD INTENDS FOR EACH OF US TO LIVE FOR A GREATER GLORY AND A GREATER STORY, THAN OUR OWN...
in addition to listening to your story, you need to write your story. at the very minimum, this means you need to name your story. and naming means saying far more than
'my parents largely ignored me, and i felt abandoned.
or even
'i had a happy childhood. i never knew life could be so hard until i grew up.
in my work as a psychotherapist, i often hear these statements. but when i ask the person to narrate, to tell the stories of life that bought him or her to make these statements, i usually get nothing more than a stare. i might as well ask the person to tell me the meaning of e+mc squared and to do so in farsi.
if we can admit the pain and loss and injustice of the past, then why is it so difficult to tell about the day just prior to each incident that marked our life with shame or anger or emptiness? why can we not decipher the themes of our life up to that point? and what about the setting-the sounds and words and sights and smells-of each damaging incident?
we know our stories very well. we just don't yet know how well.
your story has power in your own life, and it has power and meaning to bring to others. i want your story to stir me, draw me to tears, compel me to ask had questions. i want to enter your heartache and join you in the hope of redemption. but your story can't do these things if you can't tell it. you can't tell your story until you know it. and you can't truly know it without owning your part in writing it. and you won't write a really glorious story until you've wrestled with the author who has already written long chapters of your life, many of them not to your liking.
we resist telling a story we don't like and we don't like our own stories. but consider this:
IF YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR STORY,
THEN YOU MUST NOT LIKE THE AUTHOR.
or conversely:
IF YOU LOVE THE AUTHOR,
THEN YOU MUST LOVE THE STORY HE HAS WRITTEN IN AND FOR YOUR LIFE.
let's engage the author of our story so we can enter into the joy He holds before us if we live out our story for the sake of others.
IF WE COME TO KNOW OUR STORY AND
THEN GIVE IT AWAY,
WE WILL DISCOVER THE DEEPEST MEANING IN OUR LIVES.
WE WILL DISCOVER THE AUTHOR WHO IS EMBEDDED IN OUR STORY,
AND WE WILL KNOW THE GLORY HE HAS DESIGNED FOR EACH ONE OF US TO REVEAL.
it is toward this good end that we now set out.
note: well,
is this going to be a book that changes my life,
will it be something that i choose not or 'cannot' do my part to the point of reaching the unbelievable place set forth above
or will it prove a dud, a fake, a fiasco.
time will tell. if the book opens the door to as great and earth shaking life change as it predicts and if i make the effort..am given the grace to get to the last sentence...it will be worth any price i pay, any difficulty i encounter.
i am already thinking of people i know..starting with my estranged wife..who i would like to invite to join with me in this journey.
we will see.
man proposes, God disposes.
1.2... everyone has a story. put another way, everyone's life is a story. but most people don't know how to read their life in a way that reveals their story. they miss the deeper meaning in their life, and they have little sense of how God has written their story to reveal Himself and His own story.
if you don't think such things are important, consider a conversation i had recently with a friend who was weighing a career move. he showed me a list of pros and cons. there were an equal number of problems and benefits no matter what he decided-whether he changed jobs or stayed where he was.
'if the list is weighted according to my values and dreams, he observed, it's a dead heat. i might as well flip a coin.
but my friend was overlooking his own story, the one thing that would give him direction in making this decision. he hadn't considered God's authorship of his life. he was aware of god's authority but not of God's ongoing creative work in his life-and in all our lives.
'which choice allows you to live your life most consistently with how God has been writing your life story?, i asked.
my friend had no idea what i was getting at. so i asked him if he'd ever studied his life to see what story, what themes, and what plot God was writing his life to reveal. he still looked at me as if i were from outer space.
'why would i study my life? he asked. i was there as everything happened, so what is there to study?
this is a bright, honest, good man who is sensitive to God. he listens well to his wife's heart and he is intentional about doing the right thing in countless areas of his life-health, finances, time with his kids and spirituality. but he saw no value in reading his own story.
most of us have spent more time studying a map to avoid getting lost on a trip than we have studying our life so we'll know how to proceed into the future. when we're preparing to make significant decisions,
why will we study a stock report but fail to look at our own story?
why will we read various o op-ed pieces to help clarify our views on a controversial topic but ignore our own past, which helped form our most important views?
if we're taking a course, we're willing to study books that bore us to pieces, but we won't take time to review our own life, which holds answers about God and our selves that will thrill us, amaze us and sober us. we read and study a great variety of sources and spend time researching our options in order to live in the right direction. but SELDOM DO WE APPROACH OUR OWN LIFE WITH THE MIND SET OF A STUDENT, EAGER TO LEARN, GAIN INSIGHT AND FIND DIRECTION FOR THE FUTURE.
we habitually push aside the one thing that can clarify not only how we got to where we are today but also where God is leading us tomorrow and beyond. our own life is the thing that most influences and shapes our outlook, our tendencies, our choices and our decisions. it is the force that orients us toward the future, and yet we don't give it a second thought. much less a careful examination. it's time to listen to our own story.
if you stick with me awhile, we'll take a close look at 4 core issues that are of crucial importance to you-even if you don't yet realize it.
first, GOD is not merely the creator of our life. He IS also THE AUTHOR OF OUR LIFE, and HE WRITES EACH PERSON'S LIFE TO REVEAL HIS DIVINE STORY. there never has been nor ever will be another life like mine-or like yours. just as there is only one face and name like mine, so there is only one story like mine. and God writes the story of my life to make something known about Himself, the one who wrote me. the same is true of you. your life and mine not only reveal who we are, but they also help reveal who God is.
second, NEITHER YOUR LIFE NOR MINE IS A SERIES OF RANDOM SCENES THAT PILE UP LIKE SHOES IN A CLOSET. we don't have to clear out old stories to make room for new ones.
BOTH YOUR STORY AND MINE HAVE
UNIQUE CHARACTERS,
SURPRISING TWISTS
CENTRAL THEMES
TENSION AND SUSPENSE, and
DEEP SIGNIFICANCE.
EACH IS AN INTRIGUING TALE AND NEITHER IS FICTION.
our story is truer than any other reality we know, and
EACH OF US MUST DISCOVER THE MEANING OF WHAT GOD HAS WRITTEN AS OUR LIFE STORY.
IN OUR STORY GOD SHOWS US WHAT HE'S UP TO AND
WHAT HE WANTS US TO BE ABOUT.
with the third core issue, things start to get exciting.
WHEN I STUDY AND UNDERSTAND MY LIFE STORY, I CAN THEN JOIN GOD AS A COAUTHOR.
i don't have to settle for merely being a reader of my life;
GO CALLS ME TO BE A WRITER OF MY FUTURE.
He asks me to take the only life i will ever be given and shape it
in the direction He outlines for me. i am to keep writing, moving forward into the plot that god has woven into the sinews of my soul.
and fourth, THERE IS THE NECESSITY AND BLESSING OF TELLING OUR STORY TO OTHERS. to the degree that we know God and then join Him in writing our story, we are honored to join others in the calling of storytelling. God, of course is the master storyteller. His self revelation is captured in a sweeping narrative and then given to us in the book that grips our heart and captures our soul. God also creates a story with each person's life-a story that we are meant to tell.
AND SINCE WE ARE CALLED TO TELL OUR STORY,
WE ARE ALSO CALLED TO LISTEN TO THE STORIES OF OTHERS.
and since we are to tell and to listen, then
EVEN MORE SO WE ARE CALLED TO ENCOURAGE OTHERS
TO KNOW
AND TELL
AND LISTEN TO GOD'S OWN STORY as well as their own.
God is calling us to fully explore, to fully enjoy and to fully capture the power of the great story. one way we do this is by listening to our lesser stories and then telling them to others.
do you ever feel that you're stuck,
just going through the motions,
not hearing from God, and
not feeling any passion about your life?
it's easy to land there if you're not listening to your story.
God writes our story with great passion and desire, and He reveals our own passions and desires as we read and listen to our story. so i was saddened to see my friend about to make a huge life decision without first asking;
WHO AM I?
WHAT ABOUT GOD AM I MOST UNIQUELY SUITED TO REVEAL TO OTHERS?
AND HOW IS THAT MEANING IN MY LIFE BEST LIVED OUT?
my friend wasn't listening to his own story to gain direction for his decision about the future.
i'm grateful the he accepted the counsel of a self-confessed fool and answered a series of questions that i asked him to consider. you will be asked to answer the same questions as you read this book. to answer these simple questions, you must study your own story. you must listen to the heartache and hope that are etched in the narrative of your life. and you must find the meaning God has written there.
i asked my friend to join God in writing the next paragraph and then the next page of the story that is his life. i'm asking you to do the same. allow others to read and edit and critique and join in the glory of the great story God is telling through you.
YOUR STORY HELPS REVEAL THE GREATEST STORY,
THE STORY THAT GOD IS TELLING ABOUT HIMSELF.
GOD INTENDS FOR EACH OF US TO LIVE FOR A GREATER GLORY AND A GREATER STORY, THAN OUR OWN...
in addition to listening to your story, you need to write your story. at the very minimum, this means you need to name your story. and naming means saying far more than
'my parents largely ignored me, and i felt abandoned.
or even
'i had a happy childhood. i never knew life could be so hard until i grew up.
in my work as a psychotherapist, i often hear these statements. but when i ask the person to narrate, to tell the stories of life that bought him or her to make these statements, i usually get nothing more than a stare. i might as well ask the person to tell me the meaning of e+mc squared and to do so in farsi.
if we can admit the pain and loss and injustice of the past, then why is it so difficult to tell about the day just prior to each incident that marked our life with shame or anger or emptiness? why can we not decipher the themes of our life up to that point? and what about the setting-the sounds and words and sights and smells-of each damaging incident?
we know our stories very well. we just don't yet know how well.
your story has power in your own life, and it has power and meaning to bring to others. i want your story to stir me, draw me to tears, compel me to ask had questions. i want to enter your heartache and join you in the hope of redemption. but your story can't do these things if you can't tell it. you can't tell your story until you know it. and you can't truly know it without owning your part in writing it. and you won't write a really glorious story until you've wrestled with the author who has already written long chapters of your life, many of them not to your liking.
we resist telling a story we don't like and we don't like our own stories. but consider this:
IF YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR STORY,
THEN YOU MUST NOT LIKE THE AUTHOR.
or conversely:
IF YOU LOVE THE AUTHOR,
THEN YOU MUST LOVE THE STORY HE HAS WRITTEN IN AND FOR YOUR LIFE.
let's engage the author of our story so we can enter into the joy He holds before us if we live out our story for the sake of others.
IF WE COME TO KNOW OUR STORY AND
THEN GIVE IT AWAY,
WE WILL DISCOVER THE DEEPEST MEANING IN OUR LIVES.
WE WILL DISCOVER THE AUTHOR WHO IS EMBEDDED IN OUR STORY,
AND WE WILL KNOW THE GLORY HE HAS DESIGNED FOR EACH ONE OF US TO REVEAL.
it is toward this good end that we now set out.
note: well,
is this going to be a book that changes my life,
will it be something that i choose not or 'cannot' do my part to the point of reaching the unbelievable place set forth above
or will it prove a dud, a fake, a fiasco.
time will tell. if the book opens the door to as great and earth shaking life change as it predicts and if i make the effort..am given the grace to get to the last sentence...it will be worth any price i pay, any difficulty i encounter.
i am already thinking of people i know..starting with my estranged wife..who i would like to invite to join with me in this journey.
we will see.
man proposes, God disposes.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
11.3.2012 BARACK OBAMA OR MITT ROMNEY?
ironically, the presidential race is not really very important at all. the magnifying glass placed over it by the media shows that we are no longer in any sense a free people. if we were free people, we would
-not listen to the media in the first place.
-have impeached virtually every (naw, let's say EVERY, for they all got the disease) elected official long ago...on one issue alone,
thinking that they are in charge rather than stewards of what has been entrusted to them by law
ie. the president should stop making laws as that isn't what a president is elected to do.
the supreme court should stop making laws as that is not what they are elected to do.
the congress should revoke any laws made by the president and supreme court.
-have regularly reinstalled and reimpeached officials until they keep the oath they swear to abide by the constitution...
..but none of this does any good if the laws do not reflect the fear and wisdom of the God of the bible.
also, IRONICALLY, 'FREEDOM' IS NO LONGER IMPORTANT
WHEN IT CHANGES FROM
freedom to obey God and be His servant and the servant of one's fellow man TO
freedom to do as i please.
...we in america have morphed from the first to the second which is another way of saying SLAVERY.
HUMPTY DUMPTY HAS FALLEN and
all the king's horses and all the king's men can't put him together again.
i used to think that it was very strange that a person would not vote..whether through apathy or religious conviction, etc. i am coming round...maybe...
if any real people with the guts to do what is right i might vote again some day.
but before dropping out totally from this 'privilege'
(to send a person to a place of governmental authority where in disregard to God, law or any other possible restraint...they do what they DAMN WELL PLEASE...i'm not cursing them..rather trying to capture the general impression i have from american 'public servants' i have observed from close up or far away).
i plan to write in, for the third election in a row, the considered-crazy Paul man who comes the closest to being an electable...write him in for all the republicans up for other offices too.
i hope to help barack obama get reelected for i see that as the quickest way to bring about the demise of america, the economic, media and sexual sewage pipe currently spewing out its filth to the rest of the (imitating) world...after all we must be right..we have all the $$$$$$$. we need to 'mainline' a second dose of president obama in order to get to total destruction more quickly.
but there is also a kind of is a 'win' situation if mitt romney squeezes in. he,
the quintessential shining, modeled, plastic party icon designed to get the most votes possible..given the unfortunate moral deficit he must lug around to get those weird people who abhor things like public genocide,
seems more likely to succeed (for a short while) in patching up the economic black hole of immoral america..
which will be handy to give the illusion that we are still 'blessed' of God...
and bring a complete and overdue destruction of the republican party.
my hope is not the republican party. (i come from generations of republicans and have been a card carryer all my adult life.)
my hope is not a 'more healthy economy.
my hope is not in anything other that a complete renunciation of who we currently are.
my hope is to wake up from my spiritually drugged state and
START TO FEAR GOD ENOUGH TO OBEY HIM as a good slave would obey his master.
luke 6 CREDO
love my enemy
do good to those who hate me
bless those who curse me
pray for those who spitefully abuse me
judge no one
condemn no one
pardon everyone
give (good measure, pressed down shaken together, running over)
trust God (jeremiah 17.5f
God will progressively destroy america as she is,
God will bless whoever obeys His word and puts all their trust in Him alone.
-not listen to the media in the first place.
-have impeached virtually every (naw, let's say EVERY, for they all got the disease) elected official long ago...on one issue alone,
thinking that they are in charge rather than stewards of what has been entrusted to them by law
ie. the president should stop making laws as that isn't what a president is elected to do.
the supreme court should stop making laws as that is not what they are elected to do.
the congress should revoke any laws made by the president and supreme court.
-have regularly reinstalled and reimpeached officials until they keep the oath they swear to abide by the constitution...
..but none of this does any good if the laws do not reflect the fear and wisdom of the God of the bible.
also, IRONICALLY, 'FREEDOM' IS NO LONGER IMPORTANT
WHEN IT CHANGES FROM
freedom to obey God and be His servant and the servant of one's fellow man TO
freedom to do as i please.
...we in america have morphed from the first to the second which is another way of saying SLAVERY.
HUMPTY DUMPTY HAS FALLEN and
all the king's horses and all the king's men can't put him together again.
i used to think that it was very strange that a person would not vote..whether through apathy or religious conviction, etc. i am coming round...maybe...
if any real people with the guts to do what is right i might vote again some day.
but before dropping out totally from this 'privilege'
(to send a person to a place of governmental authority where in disregard to God, law or any other possible restraint...they do what they DAMN WELL PLEASE...i'm not cursing them..rather trying to capture the general impression i have from american 'public servants' i have observed from close up or far away).
i plan to write in, for the third election in a row, the considered-crazy Paul man who comes the closest to being an electable...write him in for all the republicans up for other offices too.
i hope to help barack obama get reelected for i see that as the quickest way to bring about the demise of america, the economic, media and sexual sewage pipe currently spewing out its filth to the rest of the (imitating) world...after all we must be right..we have all the $$$$$$$. we need to 'mainline' a second dose of president obama in order to get to total destruction more quickly.
but there is also a kind of is a 'win' situation if mitt romney squeezes in. he,
the quintessential shining, modeled, plastic party icon designed to get the most votes possible..given the unfortunate moral deficit he must lug around to get those weird people who abhor things like public genocide,
seems more likely to succeed (for a short while) in patching up the economic black hole of immoral america..
which will be handy to give the illusion that we are still 'blessed' of God...
and bring a complete and overdue destruction of the republican party.
my hope is not the republican party. (i come from generations of republicans and have been a card carryer all my adult life.)
my hope is not a 'more healthy economy.
my hope is not in anything other that a complete renunciation of who we currently are.
my hope is to wake up from my spiritually drugged state and
START TO FEAR GOD ENOUGH TO OBEY HIM as a good slave would obey his master.
luke 6 CREDO
love my enemy
do good to those who hate me
bless those who curse me
pray for those who spitefully abuse me
judge no one
condemn no one
pardon everyone
give (good measure, pressed down shaken together, running over)
trust God (jeremiah 17.5f
God will progressively destroy america as she is,
God will bless whoever obeys His word and puts all their trust in Him alone.
Friday, November 2, 2012
11.2.2012 JESUS CHRIST SAVES SUSSANA'S SON, JOHN!
oh Lord, work in me so i no longer assent to 'correct doctrine' but do what You say. i like john wesley hunger for REALITY, not just words. it seems like i'm 'living'. i hunger to be truly crucified with Christ so that it is no longer i who live but Christ who lives in, and is experienced by me...so that others see Him not me.
below taken from sussana wesley by charles ludwig..
160.2 while john and charles were attendig oxford, the morals of the students were extrememly low. drinking, gambling, idleness, and loose living were common. both john ancd charles rebelled at this. charles wrote: diligence led me into serious thinking. i went to the weekly sacrament and persuaded two or three young students to accompany me and to observe the method of study prescribed by the statutes of the uiversity. this gave me the harmless name of METHODIST.
soon, this little group increased until it had as many as 25 members. from susanna, charles had learned the value of method; and, now that hed had founded this group which was soon to be known as the holy club, methods became part of their system. each minute of day had its purpose. there was a certain time for prayer, fasting, studying the bible, distributing alms, visiting prisoners, group discussions, taking communion, and so on.
i was because of these methods, members of the holy club were sneered at as being methodists. and it was because charles wesley had founded the holy club that he is revered as being the first methodist.
while john and charles continued at oxford, susanna kept up a steady correspondence with them. she encouraged them, discussed fine points in theology, and gave advice. she rejoiced when they were ordained priests in the church of england. but she refused to insist that they follow this course. that tsk, she felt, was the work of the Holy Spirit.
169.last...on october 14, 1735, john and charles took a boat from gravesend in ordderto embark for georgia. that afternoon they boarded the simmonds. although their mother was absent, her influence was still with them. the idea of method which they had learned from her had become part of the fiber of their lives. they had agreed to be engaged in private prayer each morning from 4 till 5; to study the bible together from 5 till 7; to breakfast from 7 till 8; from 8 until 9 to have public prayers; and to continue on in this manner until they retired for the ight between 9 and 10. it was a hectic schedule.
during their third month at sea, the simmonds was caught in a terrible storm. john recorded the event in his journal.
'at noon our third storm began. at 4 it was more violent that before. the winds roared about us. the ship not only rocked...with the utmost violence, but shook and jarred with so unequal, grating motion, that one could not but with great difficulty keep one's hold of anything, nor stand a moment without it. every ten minutes came a chock from the stern or side of the shi, which one would think would dash the planks to pieces.
'at 7 i went to the germans (they were called moravians and were on their way to georgia). i had long before observed the great seriousness of their behavior. of their humility tey had given me continual proof. and every day had given them occasion of showing a meekness which no injury could remove. if they were pushed, struck, or thrown down, they rose again and went away; but no complaint wsas found in their mouth. there was now an opportunity of trying whether they were delivered from the spirit of fear, as well as from that of pride, anger and revenge. in the midst of the psalm wherewith their service began, the sea broke over, split the main sail in pieces, covdered the ship and poured in between the decks, as if the great deep had already swallowed us up. a terrible screaming began among the english.
the moravians calmly sung on.
i asked one of them afterwards, '(were) you not afraid?
he answered, 'i thank God, no.
i asked, 'but were not your women and children afraid?
he replied, mildly, 'no;p our women and children are not afraid to die.
the storm stopped at noon.
but the turmoil in wesley's heart did not stop.
again and again he questioned himself,
'WHAT IS IT THAT THESE MORAVIAN BRETHREN HAVE THAT I DO NOT HAVE?
could it be, he wondered, that there is more to christianityh than the mere reading of prayers and the quoting of scripture?
...after almost 4 months on the ocean, the simmonds reached the savannah river on february 5, 1736. both john and charles were utterly wearied by their trip. still, both remained intrigued by the Christ like lives of the moravians.
approaching mr. spangenberg, one of the moravian pastors, john questioned him about the serenity or his people. in reply, the pastor said,
'my brothr, i must first ask you one or two questions.
HAVE YOU THE WITNESS WITHIN YOURSELF?
does the Sprit of God bear witness with your spirit that you are a child of God?
mumbed by the question, john remained silent.
then spangenberg had another question.
'DO YOU KNOW JESUS CHRIST?
'i know that He is the saviour of the world, replied john after a pause.
'true, replied the german,
''but do you know that He has saved YOU?
the pastor's emphasis on YOU startled john.
didn't the man know that he had and oxford degree,
that he was a fellow of lincoldn college,
an ordained priest,
the son of an ordained priest,
an ardent student of the bible,
a missionary,
and that he had served as a curate?
and didn't he know that he had been baptized as an infant,
that he had been raised in the church,
and that his parents were godly people?
finally, john wesley gulped,
'i hope...He..died to save me.
but his words had a doubtful ring in them.
neither john nor charles was happy in georgia...
neither john nor charles had been converted to the moravian faith. but each had been definitely influenced. moreover, peter bohler, another moravian, had kept in contact with them in london. realizing that he would preach faith, john was puzzled;
for he himself, had very little faith.
approaching peter, he asked,
'but what can i preach?
peter replied:
'PREACH FAITH TIL YOU HAVE IT;
AND THEN BECAUSE YOU HAVE IT,
YOU WILL PREACH FAITH.
john followed his friend's advice. but this led to problems, as indicated by his journal.
tues. 9. i preached at great st. helen's..on
'he spared not His own son, but delivered Him up for us all.
my heart was now so enlarged to declare the love of God to all that were oppressed by the devil,
that i did not wonder in the least when i was afterward told,
'sir, you must preach here no more.
sun. 14. i preached in the morning at st. ann's aldersgate; and in the afternoon at the savoy chapel, free salvation in the blood of Christ. i was quickly apprized that at st. ann's, likewise, i am to preach no more.
and so it went. the pulpit was closed to him at st. john's, wapping,at st. bennett's, at paul's-warf, and other places. charles, too, was ignored.
with almost every door bolted in front of them, charles and john (and sussana with them) were dismayed and heartbroken. neither charles nor john knew that an amazing breakthrough which would transform england was less than two weeks away.
kezzyhad a breakthrough experience in which she realized that Christ had come to earth to die for her sins. her feeling of assurance was so profound and so visible that charles was inspired to write one of his greatest hymns:
love divine, all love excelling
joy of heaven, to earth come down.
fix in us Thy humble dwelling
all Thy faithful mercies crown
following kezzy's 'conversion', charles had his own encounter with the Lord. his was in a rowhouse-number 12-in little britain, a short street that right angles from aldersgate. his conversion was on may 21 and was the result of a 'poor ignorant mechanic who knew nothing but Christ'.
three days later, feeling that he had never really been converted,
(note: this testimony is very meaningful to me..it 'speaks' deeply to me because it has many parallels to mine..
you don't know Christ because of your family.
you don't know Christ because of what you understand mentally.
you don't know Christ because of what you have done.
you don't know Christ because you believe the bible.)
john wesley concentrated on studying the new testament. to his amazement, he learned that the conversion experience was almost always an instantaneous one. troubled, he continued to consult with bohler, and then with bohler's friends. finally convinced that simple faith was the answer, he resolved in his own words to renounce
'all dependence in whole or in part, upon my own works or righteousness.
but pray as he would, nothing seemed to happen.
then about 5 in the morning on wednesday, may 24, 1738, he opened his greek new testament to II peter 1.4. there, he read:
'whereby are given unto us exceedingly great and precious promises; that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature.
afterwards, just as he left the house, he read the words of Jesus:
'thou art not far from the kingdom of god mark 12.34.
in the afternoon he was invited by a friend to attend a service in the nearby st. paul's cathedral.
curiously, the anthem was psalm 130. backgrounded by music of henry purcell, former organist of westminster abbey, the words were:
'out of the deep have i called unto Thee, o Lord; Lord, hear my voice.
john listened intently, for that anthem fitted his need as closely as a glove fits a hand. what happened after that? turning to his journal we read:
'in the evening i went very unwillingly to a society in aldersgate street, where one was reading luther's preface to the epistle to the romans. about a quarter till nine, while he was describing the change which God works in the heart through faith in Christ,
i felt my heart strangely warmed,
i felt that i did trust Christ,
Christ alone for salvation:
and an assurance was given me,
that He had taken away MY sins,
even MINE,
and saved ME from the law of sin and death.
assured of personal salvation through Christ, john and charles began to have a crowded ministry. soon, both were preaching many times each day. and when the churches were bolted against them, they preached in the streets, in the fields, at public gatherings. at first, they attracted a few, then hundreds, then thousands, then tens of thousands. george whitefield suggested field preaching. john was horrified. then he remembered how his mother had led services in the kitchen and how transforming those services had been. thus encouraged, he took the plunge and was soon observing gutters in the coal miners' faces as their tears washed away the dust.
(note: how is it possible to truly, i mean 'rightly', 'actually', 'savingly', know Christ and not tell every person you meet about them...to not speak the truth of God as it bears upon each person whether they say they are 'saved' or not? how is it possible. larry norman in sweet sweet song of salvation says,
when you know a pretty story, you don't let it go unsaid,
you tell it to your children as you tuck them into bed
and when you know a wonderful secret
you tell it to you friends,
tell them that a lifetime with Jesus is like a street that never ends.
it seems, well it just seems almost impossible to truly know the gospel without having to speak of it to everyone.
..and i carefully, guardedly, partially, fearfully (what will they do to me if they don't like it or don't believe it?)
at times, more likely when there are other 'christians' around for 'moral support'..
WHAT HORRIFIC GARBAGE
I MUST NOT TRULY HAVE JESUS IN MY HEART YET or i would continue the abominable, shameful, disgraceful way i am now living 'for' Him.)
below taken from sussana wesley by charles ludwig..
160.2 while john and charles were attendig oxford, the morals of the students were extrememly low. drinking, gambling, idleness, and loose living were common. both john ancd charles rebelled at this. charles wrote: diligence led me into serious thinking. i went to the weekly sacrament and persuaded two or three young students to accompany me and to observe the method of study prescribed by the statutes of the uiversity. this gave me the harmless name of METHODIST.
soon, this little group increased until it had as many as 25 members. from susanna, charles had learned the value of method; and, now that hed had founded this group which was soon to be known as the holy club, methods became part of their system. each minute of day had its purpose. there was a certain time for prayer, fasting, studying the bible, distributing alms, visiting prisoners, group discussions, taking communion, and so on.
i was because of these methods, members of the holy club were sneered at as being methodists. and it was because charles wesley had founded the holy club that he is revered as being the first methodist.
while john and charles continued at oxford, susanna kept up a steady correspondence with them. she encouraged them, discussed fine points in theology, and gave advice. she rejoiced when they were ordained priests in the church of england. but she refused to insist that they follow this course. that tsk, she felt, was the work of the Holy Spirit.
169.last...on october 14, 1735, john and charles took a boat from gravesend in ordderto embark for georgia. that afternoon they boarded the simmonds. although their mother was absent, her influence was still with them. the idea of method which they had learned from her had become part of the fiber of their lives. they had agreed to be engaged in private prayer each morning from 4 till 5; to study the bible together from 5 till 7; to breakfast from 7 till 8; from 8 until 9 to have public prayers; and to continue on in this manner until they retired for the ight between 9 and 10. it was a hectic schedule.
during their third month at sea, the simmonds was caught in a terrible storm. john recorded the event in his journal.
'at noon our third storm began. at 4 it was more violent that before. the winds roared about us. the ship not only rocked...with the utmost violence, but shook and jarred with so unequal, grating motion, that one could not but with great difficulty keep one's hold of anything, nor stand a moment without it. every ten minutes came a chock from the stern or side of the shi, which one would think would dash the planks to pieces.
'at 7 i went to the germans (they were called moravians and were on their way to georgia). i had long before observed the great seriousness of their behavior. of their humility tey had given me continual proof. and every day had given them occasion of showing a meekness which no injury could remove. if they were pushed, struck, or thrown down, they rose again and went away; but no complaint wsas found in their mouth. there was now an opportunity of trying whether they were delivered from the spirit of fear, as well as from that of pride, anger and revenge. in the midst of the psalm wherewith their service began, the sea broke over, split the main sail in pieces, covdered the ship and poured in between the decks, as if the great deep had already swallowed us up. a terrible screaming began among the english.
the moravians calmly sung on.
i asked one of them afterwards, '(were) you not afraid?
he answered, 'i thank God, no.
i asked, 'but were not your women and children afraid?
he replied, mildly, 'no;p our women and children are not afraid to die.
the storm stopped at noon.
but the turmoil in wesley's heart did not stop.
again and again he questioned himself,
'WHAT IS IT THAT THESE MORAVIAN BRETHREN HAVE THAT I DO NOT HAVE?
could it be, he wondered, that there is more to christianityh than the mere reading of prayers and the quoting of scripture?
...after almost 4 months on the ocean, the simmonds reached the savannah river on february 5, 1736. both john and charles were utterly wearied by their trip. still, both remained intrigued by the Christ like lives of the moravians.
approaching mr. spangenberg, one of the moravian pastors, john questioned him about the serenity or his people. in reply, the pastor said,
'my brothr, i must first ask you one or two questions.
HAVE YOU THE WITNESS WITHIN YOURSELF?
does the Sprit of God bear witness with your spirit that you are a child of God?
mumbed by the question, john remained silent.
then spangenberg had another question.
'DO YOU KNOW JESUS CHRIST?
'i know that He is the saviour of the world, replied john after a pause.
'true, replied the german,
''but do you know that He has saved YOU?
the pastor's emphasis on YOU startled john.
didn't the man know that he had and oxford degree,
that he was a fellow of lincoldn college,
an ordained priest,
the son of an ordained priest,
an ardent student of the bible,
a missionary,
and that he had served as a curate?
and didn't he know that he had been baptized as an infant,
that he had been raised in the church,
and that his parents were godly people?
finally, john wesley gulped,
'i hope...He..died to save me.
but his words had a doubtful ring in them.
neither john nor charles was happy in georgia...
neither john nor charles had been converted to the moravian faith. but each had been definitely influenced. moreover, peter bohler, another moravian, had kept in contact with them in london. realizing that he would preach faith, john was puzzled;
for he himself, had very little faith.
approaching peter, he asked,
'but what can i preach?
peter replied:
'PREACH FAITH TIL YOU HAVE IT;
AND THEN BECAUSE YOU HAVE IT,
YOU WILL PREACH FAITH.
john followed his friend's advice. but this led to problems, as indicated by his journal.
tues. 9. i preached at great st. helen's..on
'he spared not His own son, but delivered Him up for us all.
my heart was now so enlarged to declare the love of God to all that were oppressed by the devil,
that i did not wonder in the least when i was afterward told,
'sir, you must preach here no more.
sun. 14. i preached in the morning at st. ann's aldersgate; and in the afternoon at the savoy chapel, free salvation in the blood of Christ. i was quickly apprized that at st. ann's, likewise, i am to preach no more.
and so it went. the pulpit was closed to him at st. john's, wapping,at st. bennett's, at paul's-warf, and other places. charles, too, was ignored.
with almost every door bolted in front of them, charles and john (and sussana with them) were dismayed and heartbroken. neither charles nor john knew that an amazing breakthrough which would transform england was less than two weeks away.
kezzyhad a breakthrough experience in which she realized that Christ had come to earth to die for her sins. her feeling of assurance was so profound and so visible that charles was inspired to write one of his greatest hymns:
love divine, all love excelling
joy of heaven, to earth come down.
fix in us Thy humble dwelling
all Thy faithful mercies crown
following kezzy's 'conversion', charles had his own encounter with the Lord. his was in a rowhouse-number 12-in little britain, a short street that right angles from aldersgate. his conversion was on may 21 and was the result of a 'poor ignorant mechanic who knew nothing but Christ'.
three days later, feeling that he had never really been converted,
(note: this testimony is very meaningful to me..it 'speaks' deeply to me because it has many parallels to mine..
you don't know Christ because of your family.
you don't know Christ because of what you understand mentally.
you don't know Christ because of what you have done.
you don't know Christ because you believe the bible.)
john wesley concentrated on studying the new testament. to his amazement, he learned that the conversion experience was almost always an instantaneous one. troubled, he continued to consult with bohler, and then with bohler's friends. finally convinced that simple faith was the answer, he resolved in his own words to renounce
'all dependence in whole or in part, upon my own works or righteousness.
but pray as he would, nothing seemed to happen.
then about 5 in the morning on wednesday, may 24, 1738, he opened his greek new testament to II peter 1.4. there, he read:
'whereby are given unto us exceedingly great and precious promises; that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature.
afterwards, just as he left the house, he read the words of Jesus:
'thou art not far from the kingdom of god mark 12.34.
in the afternoon he was invited by a friend to attend a service in the nearby st. paul's cathedral.
curiously, the anthem was psalm 130. backgrounded by music of henry purcell, former organist of westminster abbey, the words were:
'out of the deep have i called unto Thee, o Lord; Lord, hear my voice.
john listened intently, for that anthem fitted his need as closely as a glove fits a hand. what happened after that? turning to his journal we read:
'in the evening i went very unwillingly to a society in aldersgate street, where one was reading luther's preface to the epistle to the romans. about a quarter till nine, while he was describing the change which God works in the heart through faith in Christ,
i felt my heart strangely warmed,
i felt that i did trust Christ,
Christ alone for salvation:
and an assurance was given me,
that He had taken away MY sins,
even MINE,
and saved ME from the law of sin and death.
assured of personal salvation through Christ, john and charles began to have a crowded ministry. soon, both were preaching many times each day. and when the churches were bolted against them, they preached in the streets, in the fields, at public gatherings. at first, they attracted a few, then hundreds, then thousands, then tens of thousands. george whitefield suggested field preaching. john was horrified. then he remembered how his mother had led services in the kitchen and how transforming those services had been. thus encouraged, he took the plunge and was soon observing gutters in the coal miners' faces as their tears washed away the dust.
(note: how is it possible to truly, i mean 'rightly', 'actually', 'savingly', know Christ and not tell every person you meet about them...to not speak the truth of God as it bears upon each person whether they say they are 'saved' or not? how is it possible. larry norman in sweet sweet song of salvation says,
when you know a pretty story, you don't let it go unsaid,
you tell it to your children as you tuck them into bed
and when you know a wonderful secret
you tell it to you friends,
tell them that a lifetime with Jesus is like a street that never ends.
it seems, well it just seems almost impossible to truly know the gospel without having to speak of it to everyone.
..and i carefully, guardedly, partially, fearfully (what will they do to me if they don't like it or don't believe it?)
at times, more likely when there are other 'christians' around for 'moral support'..
WHAT HORRIFIC GARBAGE
I MUST NOT TRULY HAVE JESUS IN MY HEART YET or i would continue the abominable, shameful, disgraceful way i am now living 'for' Him.)
11.2.2012 SUSSANA WESLEY, MAKER OF METHODISTS
recently read 'sussana wesley' (the mother of john and charles) by charles ludwig
she was raised according to what i might call 'the methodical method'...to do the same thing at the same time is the best way i can describe it. this morning i had the impression that God intended me, at 60, to become like a little child and begin to train myself
(give me a new heart, Lord..a heart that desires only to obey You..otherwise i can only become a methodist who deservingly goes to hell)
according to this method. after a life of little thought as to what happened last and what would come next..we'll see what happens, but even on the first day it is causing me to think very differently and to be a bit more focused and 'sharpened'. probably will last through tomorrow morning...but i hope not. i only have half a nano second left here with nothing done for Jesus Christ..
148.3...thankful for what he had learned, john later wrote to his mother and asked her to outline the methods she used in raising and educating her children. in a letter dated july 24, 1732, susanna replied:
the children were always put into a regular method of living in such things as they were capable of, from their birth; as in dressing and undressing, changing their linen, etc. the first quarter commonly passed in sleep, after that they were, if possible, laid into their cradle awake, and rocked to sleep.
when turned a year old (and some before) they were taught to fear the rod and to cry softly, by which means they escaped abundance of correction, the family usually lived in as much quietness as if there had not been a child among them.
as soon as they were grown pretty strong they were confined to three meals a day. at dinner their little table and chairs were set by ours. if they wanted aught they whispered to the maid. drinking or eating between meals was never allowed, unless in case of sickness. nor were they suffered to go into the kitchen to ask anything of the servants when they were at meat: if it was known that they did so, they were certainly beat, and the servants severely reprimanded.
at six oclock, as soon as family prayer was over, they had their supper; at seven the maid washed them, and beginning at the youngest, she undressed them and got them to bed by eight, at which time she left them in their several rooms awake.
susanna then went on to describe how and why she disciplined her children.
in order to form the minds of children, the first thing to be done is to conquer their will. to inform the understanding is a work of time, and must...proceed by slow degrees. i call cruel, parents who permit their children to get habits which they know must be afterwards broken.
after many more observations on that subject, susanna wrote about how she gave religious instructions to her little ones.
our children were taught as soon as they could speak the Lord's prayer, which they were made to say at rising and bedtime, to which, as they grew bigger, were added a short prayer for their parents...and some portion of scripture as their memories could bear. they were very early made to distinguish the sabbath from other days. they were taught to be still at family prayers, and to ask a blessing immediately after, which they used to do by signs, before they could kneel or speak.
they were quickly made to understand they could have nothing they cried for, and instructed to speak handsomely for what they wanted. they were not suffered to ask even the lowest servant for aught without saying, 'pray give me such a thing.
taking God's name in vain, cursing and swearing, profanity, obscenity, rude, ill bred names, were never heard among them; nor were they ever permitted to call each other by their proper names without the addition of brother or sister.
there was no such thing as loud playing or talking...everyone was kept close to business for six hours of school.
on day susanna was teaching a difficult rule of grammar, and kezzy could not understand it. patiently, susanna went over it again and again. then, noticing a shadow, she lifted her eyes and discovered that samuel had been listening. shaking his head, he commented, 'i wonder at your patience, sukey. you have told that child twenty times that same thing.
susanna smiled. 'if i had satisfied myself by mentioning it only nineteen times, i should have lost all my labor. it was the twentieth time that crowned it.
155.last ..her dream of producing children who would help change the world still continued. to enable her to do this, she produced a set of rules. here they are as she later outlined them to her son john.
1. it had been observed that cowardice and fear of punishment often lead children into lying. to prevent this a law was made that whoever was charged with a fault of which they were guilty, if they would ...confess it and promise to ament (they) should not be beaten.
2. that no sinful action, as lying, pilfering at church or on the Lord's day, disobedience, quarrelling, etc. should ever pass unpunished..
3. that no child should ever be chided or beat twice for the same fault, and that if they amended they should never be upbraided with it afterwards.
4. that every signal act of obedience, especially when it crossed upon their own inclingations, shold always be commended, and frequently rewarded according to the merits of the case.
5. that if ever any child performed an act of obedience, or did anything with an intention to please, though the performanced was not well, yet the obedience and intention should be kindly accepted, and the child with sweetness directed how to do better for the future.
6. that propriety (the rights of property) be ...preserved, and none suffered to invade the property of another in the smallest manner, thoughit were but the value of a farthing or a pin, which they might not take from the owner without, much less against, his consent.
7. that promises be strictly observed; and a gift once bestowed, and so the right passed away from the donor, be not resumed, but left to the disposal of him to who it was given, unless it were conditional, and the condition of the oboligation not performed.
8. that no girl be taught to work till she can read very well.
she was raised according to what i might call 'the methodical method'...to do the same thing at the same time is the best way i can describe it. this morning i had the impression that God intended me, at 60, to become like a little child and begin to train myself
(give me a new heart, Lord..a heart that desires only to obey You..otherwise i can only become a methodist who deservingly goes to hell)
according to this method. after a life of little thought as to what happened last and what would come next..we'll see what happens, but even on the first day it is causing me to think very differently and to be a bit more focused and 'sharpened'. probably will last through tomorrow morning...but i hope not. i only have half a nano second left here with nothing done for Jesus Christ..
148.3...thankful for what he had learned, john later wrote to his mother and asked her to outline the methods she used in raising and educating her children. in a letter dated july 24, 1732, susanna replied:
the children were always put into a regular method of living in such things as they were capable of, from their birth; as in dressing and undressing, changing their linen, etc. the first quarter commonly passed in sleep, after that they were, if possible, laid into their cradle awake, and rocked to sleep.
when turned a year old (and some before) they were taught to fear the rod and to cry softly, by which means they escaped abundance of correction, the family usually lived in as much quietness as if there had not been a child among them.
as soon as they were grown pretty strong they were confined to three meals a day. at dinner their little table and chairs were set by ours. if they wanted aught they whispered to the maid. drinking or eating between meals was never allowed, unless in case of sickness. nor were they suffered to go into the kitchen to ask anything of the servants when they were at meat: if it was known that they did so, they were certainly beat, and the servants severely reprimanded.
at six oclock, as soon as family prayer was over, they had their supper; at seven the maid washed them, and beginning at the youngest, she undressed them and got them to bed by eight, at which time she left them in their several rooms awake.
susanna then went on to describe how and why she disciplined her children.
in order to form the minds of children, the first thing to be done is to conquer their will. to inform the understanding is a work of time, and must...proceed by slow degrees. i call cruel, parents who permit their children to get habits which they know must be afterwards broken.
after many more observations on that subject, susanna wrote about how she gave religious instructions to her little ones.
our children were taught as soon as they could speak the Lord's prayer, which they were made to say at rising and bedtime, to which, as they grew bigger, were added a short prayer for their parents...and some portion of scripture as their memories could bear. they were very early made to distinguish the sabbath from other days. they were taught to be still at family prayers, and to ask a blessing immediately after, which they used to do by signs, before they could kneel or speak.
they were quickly made to understand they could have nothing they cried for, and instructed to speak handsomely for what they wanted. they were not suffered to ask even the lowest servant for aught without saying, 'pray give me such a thing.
taking God's name in vain, cursing and swearing, profanity, obscenity, rude, ill bred names, were never heard among them; nor were they ever permitted to call each other by their proper names without the addition of brother or sister.
there was no such thing as loud playing or talking...everyone was kept close to business for six hours of school.
on day susanna was teaching a difficult rule of grammar, and kezzy could not understand it. patiently, susanna went over it again and again. then, noticing a shadow, she lifted her eyes and discovered that samuel had been listening. shaking his head, he commented, 'i wonder at your patience, sukey. you have told that child twenty times that same thing.
susanna smiled. 'if i had satisfied myself by mentioning it only nineteen times, i should have lost all my labor. it was the twentieth time that crowned it.
155.last ..her dream of producing children who would help change the world still continued. to enable her to do this, she produced a set of rules. here they are as she later outlined them to her son john.
1. it had been observed that cowardice and fear of punishment often lead children into lying. to prevent this a law was made that whoever was charged with a fault of which they were guilty, if they would ...confess it and promise to ament (they) should not be beaten.
2. that no sinful action, as lying, pilfering at church or on the Lord's day, disobedience, quarrelling, etc. should ever pass unpunished..
3. that no child should ever be chided or beat twice for the same fault, and that if they amended they should never be upbraided with it afterwards.
4. that every signal act of obedience, especially when it crossed upon their own inclingations, shold always be commended, and frequently rewarded according to the merits of the case.
5. that if ever any child performed an act of obedience, or did anything with an intention to please, though the performanced was not well, yet the obedience and intention should be kindly accepted, and the child with sweetness directed how to do better for the future.
6. that propriety (the rights of property) be ...preserved, and none suffered to invade the property of another in the smallest manner, thoughit were but the value of a farthing or a pin, which they might not take from the owner without, much less against, his consent.
7. that promises be strictly observed; and a gift once bestowed, and so the right passed away from the donor, be not resumed, but left to the disposal of him to who it was given, unless it were conditional, and the condition of the oboligation not performed.
8. that no girl be taught to work till she can read very well.
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