Chapter 4 - The Hinge That Opens Heaven's Door
85 sometimes the most intricate or powerful machinery can become totally inoperative because of a missing or broken part or a faulty connection. although its potential remains tremendous, the broken machinery is good for nothing.
another way to think of this same principle is to consider how even the most enormous doors swing open and closed on relatively small hinges. although the hinges are mostly out of sight and unimpressive in comparison to the door, the door's proper operation is vitally dependent upon those hinges. an unhinged door cannot
*86 function as a door. in the spiritual realm, there is also something that, when absent, shuts down the gracious operation of the Holy Spirit and wastes the great potential of booth the individual believer and local congregations. even though people way be in relationship with the Lord, the Bible gives us some disastrous scenarios that can occur when things became spiritually unhinged.
consider, for example, the case of the Israelites. they were mightily delivered from the bondage of slavery in Egypt. god raised up Moses to be their leader and nothing Pharaoh and his armies did could stand before the power of Jehovah. after the Israelites wandered for 40 years in the desert of sinai, God raised up Joshua to lead the people. by God's power they crossed the Jordan Fiver into the promised Land, a land that was rightly named because God's promise to Abraham hundreds of years earlier was being fulfilled (Genesis 17) by divined decree, god ceded the land to Abraham's descendants. God instructed the Israelites to boldly drive out all the canaanite nations because He Himself would fight for Israel!
*87 well, if both God's promise and power were on the side of the Israelites, how is it that we read these words not long after Joshua's death? 'He (God) sold them (the Israelites) into the hands of the Philistines and the Ammonites, who that year Shattered and Crushed them. for 18 years the Oppressed all the Israelites on the east side of the Jordan in Gilead....Israel was in great Distress'. Judges 10.7-9 why did this tragic and unthinkable reversal in Israel's fortunes occur? weren't the Israelites the chosen people of God? weren't they under covenant with the Almighty? didn't the pagan Philistines and ammonites worship dumb, powerless idols? there's something seriously wrong with this picture!
as we probe deeper for an explanation, we discover that God Himself was behind the entire matter. 'He sold them into the hands of the Philistines and the ammonites'! How could God have turned against His own people? as always we look in Scripture to find the cause: 'again the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the Lord...and because the Israelites forsook the Lord and no longer served Him, He became angry with them'. Judges 10.6-7
*88 persistent, unconfessed sin was the reason behind Israel's stinging defeats at the hands of the Philistines and Ammonites. persistent, unconfessed sin was the cause of Israel's submission to an idolatrous people who easily could have been defeated otherwise. persistent, unconfessed sin was at the bottom of the whole mess, just as it is throughout all of sacred Scripture. the Israelites did evil and God's promises and power were short-circuited by the people's ungodly behavior.
even as we gain insight into the cause of Israel's pathetic plight, we find in this passage a statement of even greater importance: 'then the Israelites cried out to the Lord, 'we Have sinned against You, for- saking our God and serving the Baals (idols's) Judges 10.10 again they cried out. 'We Have Sinned. do with us whatever you think best, but please rescue us now'. then they got rid of the foreign gods among them and served the Lord. and He (God ) could bear Israel's misery no longer. vss. 15-6 we have just read about the great spiritual hinge that opens the door of heaven.
as soon as the Israelites honestly Confessed their sins and repented, God went from selling them into the hands of their enemies to quickly
*89 raising up a warrior leader. Jephthah,who subsequently reversed the fortunes of God's people. 'Then the spirit of the Lord came upon Jephthah....the Jephthah went over to fight the Ammonites and the Lord gave them into his hands. Judges 11. 29,32 from defeat to victory, from slavery to dominion - it all hinged on the simple act of sincere confession of sin.
Israel didn't add more soldiers of more sophisticated weapons to its inventory; the Israelites simply confessed their sin and God moved over to their side. they didn't need any new promises. they didn't need any new prophecies. they simply needed to get right with God by confessing from the depth of their hearts, We Have Sinned'. until they took that step, God's hand Had to oppose
*90 His own people. otherwise he would have been encouraging them to continue down an evil path that leads to every misery known to man.
now, I know that dealing with sin isn't a politically correct concept to examine in these shallow, user-friendly days, but let's do it anyway. God Hates Sin. that's the best place to start because it is the essential fact about all sin. god's holy nature detests every kind of sin. He is grieved and provoked by sin, as we see over and over again in the Bible. sin, and nothing else, is what separates man from God. this is why Christ shed His blood, endured the cross and its shame and went through the agony of being God's sacrificial lamb. He did it all to deal with the ugly face of sin in your life and mine.
in the end, God will annihilate all sin. He cannot relent from this because it is the essence of his holy nature. through Jesus he provided for the washing away of sin's guilt. through the presence of the Holy Spirit within us, He provided an antidote to sin's power over us. but always remember that in the end God will destroy the
*91 very fact of sin in the universe so that righteousness and peace can reign eternally.
it is obvious, then, that our first order of business as Christians every day is to deal with sin. daily, hourly and moment by moment, we must by the grace of god bring all our sin to the Lord in sincere and contrite confession. confession of sin is the most important key to being a people and church that lives continually under the blessing of heaven. once unconfessed sin begins to fester in our hearts and lives, there is absolutely no telling what sad chapters will be written even though we claim to be the people of God.
our need to confess sin exposes the whole fallacy of 'positive confession' (a teaching that you can have from God whatever you say) or the recitation of certain prayers as if they are a magic mantra for success. if there is unconfessed sin and a clogged-up spiritual life underneath everything, we can recite Scripture all day and claim every promise in the Bible, but God is bound by His own word not to answer us.psalm 66.18 states, 'If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear' (NKJV) this truth brings out in bold relief not only the awful effect of sin but
*92 also the incredible power of confessing our sin openly to a loving Saviour.
confessing our sin leads to the greatest spiritual joy and peace we can experience as human beings. the psalmist David, who was an expert in these matters, described it this way:
Blessed is he
whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man
whose sin the Lord does not
count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit. Psalm 32. 1-2
notice that David didn't say, 'How blessed and happy is the man or woman who has never sinned', because that would leave no chance of blessedness for anyone who has ever lived.
*93 David went on to tell us about his own experience with sin: 'when I kept Silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. for day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer' vv3-4 here this anointed servant of the Lord was going through a very hard time because of God's displeasure and relentless pressure against his disobedience. we aren't sure of the exact circumstances to which David refers, but we are certain that God's 'hand was heavy upon ' him as long as he kept silent and unrepentant about his sin. instead of the inner peace and joy he so often sang about in the psalms, he felt a horrible, dry and parched condition in his soul.
as we read on, we see a sudden reversal in David's pathetic situation: 'then I acknowledged my sin to You and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, 'I will confess my transgressions to the Lord and You forgave the guilt of my sin'. Psalm 32.5 it's as if David said, 'why do I continue to live under the Lord's displeasure? I may not be able to Undo my sin, but I Can Confess it to the God of my salvation', at the very instant he made a true confession, David found abundant mercy and pardon waiting for him.
*94 David's experience and that of the Israelites in Judges are tow examples of the incredible power and privilege we have as the children of God. we can - daily, hourly and moment by moment - confess our sins knowing that god will forgive us and chase away the dark clouds that hover over our spirits.
the great danger is for us to cover up sin, lessen the seriousness of it or justify our behavior because of 'special' circumstances. we must also void dealing selectively with our sins by confessing certain acts of disobedience while we cling to other attitudes and habit that are especially dear to us. satan uses each of these natural tendencies to keep us from the mercy of God. open and complete confession f sin brigs it to the only place it should go - to God, who can forgive and take our sin away.
real confession means to Say The Same Thing About Sin That God Says. real confession involves humbling ourselves and Agreeing With Him out the very nature of our sinfulness. to live under the
*95 blessing of heaven is to always be running toward god with our guilt and not away from Him (as if we could very hide from Him anyway). as we renounce our sin and turn from it, we give it up with full confidence that god will act in accordance with His Word. he Will forgive freely, He Will cleanse us from every stain of sin. He Will help us because of His great love.
but let's be careful to deal thoroughly with our sin, because god can never alter His holy opposition to it. what we call 'little sins' might be easily excused, but we are deceiving only ourselves. why lose God's best for our lives and dishonor Him by permitting little foxes to spoil the vine? let us ask His help in confessing every kind of disobedience, no matter how inconsequential it might seem.
remember God's eternal promise in I John 1.9: 'If We Confess Our Sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness'. the problem is not with the Lord's ability or desire to forgive and purify us; it is in the word If. we must confess agreement with God's view about our in and turn from it as something we do not ever want near us.
*96 without this careful dealing with sin, our lives and our churches will become hollow and lifeless. we may continue an outward observance of Christian ritual, but we will be strangers to the power and blessing that have been promised by god. when confession of sin is seen in its true light an is practiced by a humble, contrite people, there will always be a fresh release of the Lord's grace among us.
in recent decades many believers have rediscovered certain biblical truths. the second coming of Jesus Christ has been preached and written about more during the last 100 years than during all the preceding centuries put together. the importance of worship among Christians has been newly emphasized also. praise choruses and recordings abound across the world . these truths are very important, but they cannot even be compared with what God can and will do when confession of sin is brought back to its vital and rightful place among us
honest confession of sin undergirds and make genuine all the other things we do as Christians. how deep can our praise and worship
*97 be if the people lifting their hands and singing have made a treaty with sin? and what good are all the Christian books and sermon tapes if they never get to the heart of the matter - the reality of our sin in the eyes of a holy God?
God has faced the problem of unconfessed sin with His people many times. much of the book of Hosea is about the sad plight of Israel when the people would not give up their sin no matter what God said or did for them. the Lord loved His people dearly and expressed this over and over again as He called them back to Himself. He even threatened severe remedial action, saying that he would become 'like a lion to Ephraim (Israel), like a great lion to Judah. I will tar them to pieces and go away....I will go back to my place'. Hosea 5.14-5 what a terrible consequence for the people of Israel: the blessing and special presence of Jehovah Himself would go away as part of a divine strategy.
and what was the strategy? what was the aim of these strong, corrective steps taken against His very own? 'then I will go back to My place Until They Admit Their Guilt. and they will seek my face; in their misery they will earnestly seek Me'.
*98 v15. the whole point was to get the Israelites to admit and confess their sin. the emptiness God wanted to heighten among them by His going 'away' was only to cause them to face up to their sins. once they admitted their guilt, a brand-new channel of fellowship and blessing from God would be opened.
please remember, this entire process of discipline was carried out against the chosen people of God. the Lord was not a 'lion' tearing to pieces the nations of Moab or Egypt. he was a 'lion' to his won wayward children who needed to confess their sin. and so it remains to this day.
as peter wrote in the New Testament, 'for it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God'. I peter 4.17 Of course it must begin with the family of God. how will unbelievers be convicted of their sin and turn to Christ if the people who are preaching the gospel deal fast and easy with their own sin? or, more to the point, how can the Holy Spirit effectively carry out His work through a church that permits unholy things in the lives of the congregation?
the church God blesses must maintain a holy guard against the cancerous nature of sin. sermons
*99 and exhortations cannot omit this important truth just because it makes some people feel uncomfortable. we must remember that wonderful things happen when sin is brought out into the open and confessed.
consider what happened in Ephesus about 2000 years ago when 'many of those who believed now came and openly confessed their evil deeds. a number who had practiced sorcery brought their scrolls together and burned them publicly'. Acts 19.18-9 was this bonfire an unnecessary, melodramatic touch or did it serve an important purpose? the Bible makes a clear connection between such a radical dealing with sin and the spiritual results that followed. 'In The Way the word of the Lord spread widely and grew in power'. v20 when confession and carefulness about sin prevail in the church,. so will God's will prevail in the spreading of the gospel of Jesus Christ. the worst possible scenario is for our churches to be supposedly 'growing' but with 'members' who have no deep longing to be delivered from the power of sin. that situation will fulfill the New Testament prophecy of 'terrible times in the last days' when people will
*100 have 'a form of godliness' but live every day 'denying its power' II Timothy 3.1,5
we all know how easy that can begin to happen in our own lives and churches. we can attend services regularly and even read the Bible without getting to the root problem on which god is putting His finger. an incident from my life serves as a reminder of how important it is to deal with sin no matter how insignificant it may seem to be.
Carol and I had been married only a few months and were both working in New York City. the furthest thought from our minds was that we
*101 might some day pastor a church. we were a typical, newlywed couple living in a tiny apartment in Brooklyn.
there are many adjustments you have to make when you are first married and I wasn't mature enough to make some of them well. one day after we came home together on the subway from work, Carol was good enough to cook one of my favorite meals -steak with a baked potato and vegetables. the only trouble was, I like steak on the rare side and what she put in front of me tasted like a piece of well-done she leather. this disturbed me because Carol Knew how I like steak cooked. in my immaturity i made a less-than-complimentary remark to her. she had experienced a long day at the office and was in no mood for my lack of appreciation of her culinary skills, so she gave me a less than pleasant reply. this provoked me to say some unkind words, which resulted in a classic, newly married couple's spat. the meal was ruined. (my precious steak went down the drain!) and the atmosphere was no longer love and kisses.
I was determined to have the last word and determined that it would be a righteous one at
*102 that! I declared that I was going to the midweek church service that night and added that not even a burnt-to-a-crisp piece of steak would keep me from my devotion to Christ! not surprisingly, I went alone. and I justified my behavior all the way to the church door. I listened as best i could to the sermon, but then the pastor called the few believers present to come to the altar for a season of prayer. that's when my dilemma came to a head.
I knelt down and was silent for a while. to say that the skies above me were like brass would be an extreme understatement. instead of having faith to lay my needs before God. all I could sense was my hardness of heart and guilt for my sins. almost immediately I sensed God speaking deep within me:
'Ge up
go home
tell her you were wrong and
say you're sorry!' this was not exactly what i had in my mind when I made my way to church. didn't God understand the extreme cruelty of a burned-up piece of meat? was this really the Holy Spirit speaking to me, or a false spirit from the pit of hell? how could anyone who loved me ask me to do such an impossible thing as saying 'I'm wrong' and 'I'm sorry' all in the same night?
*103 I disregarded as best I could what i felt God was saying to me. I tried hard to pray, but I was between a rock and a hard place. the One whose help I needed was the very one who had a controversy with me. and he would not relent! all I could hear over and again as I knelt at that altar was, 'Get up, go home, tell her you were wrong and day you're sorry!' finally, I gave up pretending to pray and went home as directed.
while driving home, I still argued about the unfairness of the whole situation. I was willing to do a lot of things for the Lord , but I thought He was really being unreasonable. i would have visited the sick and shut-in folks. but to confess my sin openly to my wife, of all people and then apologize on top of it - well, that was a cross far too heavy for a mere mortal like me to bear. my proud and sensitive soul could not accept why I had to be one who came crawling!
I quieted down a bit while walking to the apartment after parking my car and my heart became very tender as i ascended the one flight of stairs to our door. as soon as I opened it and walked down the hallway, tears began to flow
*104 before I could call out to Carol, she was already heading toward me. as i reached out my arm to hold her, I sobbed out as best i could. 'i'm so sorry, I was so wrong to talk that way. please forgive me'. Carol then said with brokenness that she was also sorry for how she responded. (she didn't need to say that because i knew I was the real culprit.)
if someone had seen us embracing lie that in a half-lit hallway, they never would have understood the depth of what was transpiring. as I spoke aloud my confession of failure and sin to my wife and to God, the blessings of God poured down upon me like a rive of fresh water on a dry desert. peace and joy welled up together as my tears became a language that i knew God understood, because it was to him and not Carol alone that i was speaking. and I can tell you from firsthand experience how true the psalmist was when he wrote
'then I acknowledged my sin to yo
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, 'I will confess
my transgressions to the Lord' -
*105 and You forgave
the guilt of my sin.
therefore let everyone who is godly pray to You
while You may be found;
surely when the might waters rise,
they will not reach him. psalm 32.5-6
this powerful truth applies to all believers and every Christian congregation. when we honestly confess our sins, we clear the way for fresh blessings to come upon us from the Lord. it is possible that right now you are sitting in the shadows rather than in the sunlight of God's favor. the only thing in the world that can keep you there is unconfessed sin. why live one minute longer in that condition when a loving, merciful god is calling you into fellowship with Him? don't put it off another day. use David's prayer for mercy as a help as you go to the throne of grace.
Have mercy on me, O God,
according to Your unfailing love;
*106 according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
for i know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me....
hide Your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity....
restore to me the joy of Your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
then I will teach transgressors Your ways.
and sinners will turn back to You. Psalm 51.1-3,9,12-3
Chapter 5 - Heart Problems
*107 while I was writing this book, my wife and i were visited by her Uncle Mel and his wife, Phyllis, from Portland, Oregon. Mel Arn grew up on a dairy farm in Wisconsin and became a Christian at a young age. his zeal for the Lord and spiritual things, especially prayer, never flagged and was still evident during his stay at our home. he was 81 years old. physically full of vigor and did daily push-ups to help keep himself fit!
yesterday, before I began writing this chapter, we received a phone call that Mel had gone to be with the Lord. he had returned home from
*108 his trip 'back east' and was excited and grateful that he had visited with so many old friends and family members. then he simply went to bed and during the night was ushered into the presence of the Lord. an old soldier full of prayer and devotion to Christ, he entered into his eternal reward. while he slept that last night, his heart simply stopped beating. no matter how fit you are for your age or how many vitamin supplements you take, when your heart stops working, your life ends.
although physical hear problems claim many victims each year across our country, there are heart problems of another kind that I want us to consider. the heart is also of critical importance in a spiritual sense. the church and especially the pulpit that god blesses, has to have a unique kind of Heart. i believe the heart factor is the most overlooked aspect of all our sincere searching for keys to living successfully for Jesus Christ.
when ever we think about the ministry of a Christian pastor, teacher, or evangelist, our minds turn to the example set by the apostle Paul. whenever we analyze the building of an
*109 effective Christin church, our thoughts again turn to Paul, the 'expert builder', I Corinthians 3.10, who by the grace of God laid the only true foundation and built wisely upon it. no one in the Bible had such insight into the blessing of god upon both the ministry and the church as the apostle Paul. this is illustrated by the fact that his life after conversion dominates the book of acts and most of the epistles (letters)of the New Testament were written by him. no one had deeper insight into the gospel and the mystery of divine grace than this man who went from being a Jewish zealot who persecuted believers to being the greatest ambassador for Jesus the world has ever seen. so if we want to experience more of God's power working through us, we must study carefully the life and ministry of this great Christian.
because of his great impact, more books have been written about the apostle paul than any person in Scripture other than Jesus Christ. in these volumes 2 very important aspects of paul's phenomenal ministry have often been analyzed: his message and his method.
*110 first, the Message Paul preached is essential to our understanding of him. his main focus was always the Gospel, or good news, about Jesus Christ. in fact, Paul saw his calling as an apostle to be centered in the 'priestly duty of proclaiming the gospel of God' Romans 15.16 Paul, unlike Moses, was not a preacher of merely the Law of God. the apostle certainly used the holy commandments in his message, but it was only to prepare the minds and hearts of his audience for the message of Christ. Paul also proclaimed the Promise of salvation and a new life through Jesus. he was 'not ashamed of the gospel, because it (the gospel!) is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes'. Romans 1.16
Paul didn't ask his listeners to make promises to do better or to make commitments to turn over a new leaf. that will never bring the liberating power of the Holy Spirit, because those vows are characteristic of the law of Moses, not the gospel of Jesus Christ. the apostle understood, as few others ever have, the truth that 'the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ'. John 1.17 the church
*111 God blesses is a Jesus Church, a church that recognizes that He is the only answer to the need of the human heart. a Jesus church is a place that proclaims the Good News concerning salvation, not merely the law of God that can convict of sin but does nothing to lift a soul out of its despair it is a congregation that is excited about the Lord Jesus and provides living proof of the dynamic power that is experienced when people repent of sin and put their faith in Christ. that was the message of the apostle Paul.
Second, the Method of Paul is revealed through his movements and ministry as traced through the book of acts and his letters. the odd thing about this subject is that Paul knew little about Methodology s we use the term. the apostle was a Spirit-led man from start to finish. he depended on the guidance of the holy Spirit for what he was dong and for what to do next and we can discover no church-growth formula from his life. his ministry was characterized more by divine anointing than by clever methodology.
*112 even Paul's plans to evangelize in certain areas were subject to the Holy Spirit's intervention. 'Paul and his companions traveled throughout the region of Phrygia and Dalatia, having been kept by the Holy Spirit from preaching the word in the province of Asia'. Acts 16.6 this is none of the beautiful secrets of the church and ministry god blesses. the people know that god's desire to lead His people by the Spirit has not changed, so they seek to remain sensitive to his voice. how else can God's people accomplish God's will except by being led by God's Spirit: who wants to mechanically follow dead church traditions or man-made formulas when we can have God take us by His hand and guide us?
being led by the Spirit was not an unusual experience for Paul, as we see in the next verse:
*113 'when they came to the border of Mysia, they tried to enter Bithynia, but the Spirit of Jesus wold not allow them to' (v7) Paul was not planning a vacation in Bithynia. he was planning to preach the gospel in a province that needed to hear it. even so, the Spirit of Jesus had other plans for the apostle and he obeyed in childlike fashion. Oh, how we need to follow the example of Paul's tender submission to the promptings of the Holy Spirit! others may call such devotion fanaticism or emotionalism, but the people God blesses believe their Bibles they know that the Holy Spirit has not changed one iota in 2000 years. WHAT HE DID THEN FOR PAUL HE WILL DO FOR US AS WE YIELD OUR HEARTS TO HIM AND LEARN TO LISTEN.
as important as the apostle's message and methods were to his spiritual success, there is one more piece to the puzzle. I am convinced that paul's motivation (or heart) is the most overlooked and least-taught-about aspect of his ministry to people. re there not countless churches today that proclaim the gospel of Christ from their pulpits, yet
*114 make little, if any, impact on their communities? their doctrine and message are biblical, but the results are meager compared with the apostolic model. are there not many congregations that confess belief in the present-day ministry of the Holy spirit? yet even when this belief is part of the doctrinal statement, we do not see the kind of gospel proclamation that cuts to the heart of the hearers and brings multitudes into God's kingdom. this brings us to the heart of the matter, which happens to be paul's heart.
read carefully s paul reviews his ministerial style and motives to the church in Thessalonica:
we speak as me approved of God to be entrusted with the gospel.
we are not trying to please men but God, who tests Our Hearts.
you know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed- God is our witness.
we were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else. I thessalonians 2.4-6
Paul took his calling as a preacher of the gospel quite seriously. it was a sacred task, fulfilled with
*115 a deep desire for god's approval. that longing for God's approval is always true for the ministry God blesses. there is no place in god's work for impressing people with clever oratory or using flattery to get on their good side.
the apostle wasn't looking for money and had no secret motive to fleece the flock. he wasn't interested in selling books, becoming famous or receiving accolades from the people he spoke to or anyone else. then what was his motivation as he toiled among them?
as apostles of Christ we could have been a burden to you, but we were Gentle among you, Like A Mother Caring For Her Little Children. We Loved You so Much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as sell, because you had become so dear to us. I Thessalonians 2.6-8
what a radical picture of minister these words present to our modern minds! the apostle reminded his readers of the passionate heart of love he had as he labored among them. he was 'Gentle...like a mother caring for her little
*116 children'. the picture presented her in the original Greek is that of a mother tenderly bringing a baby to her breast to be fed and nourished. the apostle boldly declared that he wasn't ready just to give the gospel message but TO GIVE HIS VERY LIFE AS WELL. that is why he described himself as having the heart of a mother who so cherishes her children that no sacrifice is too much if only it will bring blessing to her offspring.
this was the motivation behind paul's preaching and gospel work in the church in Thessalonica. no wonder his sermons had a bit to them and reached the hearts of the people his message didn't come from an educated intellect alone, but from the fervent love that burned within his soul no wonder he didn't care about their money or applause. it was all about them and their welfare, just as it always is when a mother is caring for her children.
when God blesses a pulpit and church, the heart of the pastor and congregation must be in proper working condition. selfishness and 'comfort zone' religion must be replaced by the same sacrificial love God gave to Paul. how can people powerfully preach the message of Christ without having the tender Spirit of Christ inspiring them?
*117 In fact, if I am writing this book to become well known or to profit financially, then I prostitute the high calling of a minister. (and woe to me when i have to stand before God in the end.)
Paul went on to reveal more about the inner workings of his heart: 'but, brothers, when we were torn away from you for a short time (in person, not in thought), out of our intense longing we made every effort to see you....(that sounds more lie a gushing love letter than a minister writing to a congregation!) 'FOR WHAT IS OUR HOPE, OUR JO OR THE CROWN IN WHICH WE WILL GLORY IN THE PRESENCE OF OUR LORD JESUS WHEN HE COMES?
IS IT NOT YOU?
INDEED, YOU ARE OUR GLORY AND JOY.' I Thessalonians 2.17,19
Sunday, July 15, 2018
Friday, June 29, 2018
6.30.2018 TFTS - William P. Nicholson - The Soul-Winning Life
*127 the career and Christian service of William p. Nicholson, the Irish evangelist, can be accurately summarized in the expression: from sea fever to soul-winning!
born in county Down near Bangor, in North Ireland, he seemed destined to follow the sea. his father was a sea captain in the golden age of sailing ships during the second half of the 19th century and he took his laddie for his first voyage when the latter was only 6 years of age. to this day. Nich has a painting of his father's barque, The Muriel, fully rigged, with every sail set and although the evangelist is now in his eighties, sea fever rises deep within him as he contemplates that ship. could it be that far distant in his background is the heritage of the Vikings, those restless, fearless, ea raiders who ravaged the coasts of Ireland in medieval times? Could be.
school books and common place employment on the land had no place in young William's thinking; so at 15 he sailed away from home as an apprentice seaman, he recalls:
'it was a hard and harsh training. it either made you or broke you. yet I loved it, especially up aloft during the gale of wind - the wind shrieking through the rigging and the ship rolling from side to side, the seas like miniature mountains. it intoxicated me. food was scarce - tough salt beef and salt pork and Liverpool pantiles for biscuits. the regular hours,
*128 fresh air and hard work and instant obedience made you healthy, if mostly unhappy'.
but the Irish sailor lad was taken from the sea to become a fisher of men as dramatically, if not more so, than was Peter of bethsida long ago. on one voyage with a cargo of coal, , the ship on which he sailed ran into a terrific northeaster in the 'roaring forties' after rounding cape Horn. in the tempest the ship tossed and rolled as if it would go under and the cargo began to shift. with mast broken and sails in wreckage there seemed to be no hope. by morning, another sailing ship came near; but the half-frozen men of Nich's ship did not dare jump into the sea because they knew they could never reach the lifeboat. thereupon, the other ship sailed away and left them to their doom.
the crew, however, was able to break into the hold and shift the cargo until the ship righted itself. with what rigging was left they were able to turn back around Cape Horn and reached the Falkland Islands.
the cry to God for mercy made by the crew members, including Nich, when in their extremity, meant nothing to them once they were again in safety. snatched from the sea, but not saved!
after completing his apprenticeship and working for some time on railroad construction in South Africa, he returned home. it was there by the fireside on the morning of May 22, 1899, that he was snatched the second time 'from the sea'; and that time he was really saved. while reading the morning paper and smoking and awaiting the breakfast being prepared by his godly mother, he heard suddenly and without warning, a voice saying, 'Now or never. You must decide to accept or to reject Christ'. in that moment, trembling with fear, he cried out, 'lord, I yield. i repent of all my sin and now accept Thee as my Savior'.
*129 he recalls, 'suddenly and powerfully and consciously, I was saved. such a peace and freedom from fear, such a sweet and sure assurance filled my soul. i turned to my mother and said, 'mother, i am saved. she looked at me and nearly collapsed and said, 'when? I said, 'Just now. 'where? 'here, where i am sitting. she cried with joy unspeakable. she couldn't say a word, but just hugged me and cried.
William Nicholson had been saved and he knew it. 'I have never had any doubts about my salvation, he declares. 'the Blood had been applied and the Spirit answered to the Blood. I never doubted about my dear mother's word about my natural birth and do you think it's strange of me to take God's word without a doubt or fear? i became a new creature and began hating sin. I tried hard to love God, the Bible, the church and prayer; but what a failure I made of it.
the crisis of the deeper life, with the enduement of the Holy Spirit for service, came to young Nich a few months after his conversion.. it is best to let an irishman tell his own story, so here it is.
'the peace and joy and assurance continued, but in a fluctuating way. sometimes doubting, sometimes trusting, sometimes joyful, sometimes sad. all grosser sins dropped off me and I had no sorrow about it or any bother with them, but the sins of the flesh and the spirit continue to plague me greatly: envy, jealousy, malice, hatred. i could crush them down, but they continued to rise up again, more vigorous than ever.
the fear of man was a dreadful snare and i was helplessly caught by it. I was ashamed of Christ and ashamed of being seen with out-and-out Christians. I was a sneak and a coward, if ever there was one. I despised myself, bu was helpless about it....
I attended church twice every Sun and joined the men's Bible class. I read my Bible but didn't get any good out of it, and had little or no desire for it. prayer was a real
*130 penance and seemingly useless. what a wretched, miserable experience i was passing through!
I lived in this distracted state for nearly 7 months after my conversion. some have told me I wasn't converted at all - that i only thought i was. but they were wrong. I was truly born again and a new creature in Jesus Christ. I had the inward witness clear and the outward evidence that i was a changed man....i hated sin, but was continually overcome by it. I love holiness and longed to be perfectly whole, but never experienced it. i was truly a child of God, but a slave of the devil. my life was up and down, but more down that up. i was committing sin and confessing it, but rarely having victory over it. I believed there was deliverance for me, but how to obtain it I didn't know.
i knew some Christians who were living a victorious, joyous, soul-winning life. how i envied them! i am sure if I had only made known to them the fluctuating, failing kind of life i was living, they would have led me into the open secret; but i was ashamed to make my experience known....
thank God, the day of my deliverance was at hand. one of the leading businessmen of the town, an out-and-out man fro Christ and souls, arranged for a 'Convention for the Deepening of the Christian Life. ' my older brother James and a close friend of his in his student days,Rev. J. Stuart Holden, were the convention leaders.
if they had called the conference 'holiness meetings' I would have been frightened and would never have attended. i would have called them wild , blue-stokinged Presbyterian, I would have shunned them.
from the very first sermon I heard, I was sure my brother had told Holden about me, for he made public my miserable condition. it made me feel clean mad! i determined i would
*131 not go to another service; but I was there the next night. I was more sure than ever that my brother had put the preacher up to preach at me. I became more angry every night, but could not keep myself from attendance.
Stuart Holden made the secret of the victorious Christian life so clear and plain. after one has been born again by the spirit of God he can live victoriously only by the holy Spirit. i began to understand that i could not attain this life by self effort or ceremonies, for it was 'not by might nor by power, but by the Spirit'. it was not an ATTAINMENT, but and OBTAINMENT. Christ was God's unspeakable gift to the world. The Holy Spirit was Christ's gift to His church. i had been trying to do what the Holy Spirit Alone could and would, do for me. but i must receive him by faith, on the ground of grace and he would sanctify my heart, and apply the Blood, thus cleansing me from all sin and making the victory purchased by Christ on Calvary experiential. as i walked in the light as he was in the light, he would maintain the life of holiness and victory in my life day by day.
it was all so wonderful and new to me. I had never heard such truth before. Oh, how my heart ached for just such a life, but I was hindered by fear of the consequences. I didn't want to be anything or do anything a presbyterian ought not to be or do. I tried so hard to make the Lord see and understand my fears and feelings, but he had no sympathy for my fears. i couldn't make Him a Presbyterian!
the Salvation Army had come to our town. the Corps was composed of two wee girls in uniform. they held open-air meetings and made a noise with their tambourines. their first soldier was a man called Daft Jimmy. he carried the flag as they marched the streets. on his jersey, a red one, he had hardly enough brains to give him a headache, but he had sense enough to get saved. he carried the flag as they marched the streets. on his jersey, a red one, he had the women put with white yarn these words on his back, 'SAVED FROM PUBLIC OPINION'.
*132 'I was told by satan that i would have to go to the open-air meeting and march down the street with two wee girls and a fool. maybe that didn't fill me with horrible dread! I would be laughed at by all my friends. i would lose my reputation.
i said, 'Lord, I will be willing to go to Timbuctoo or Hong Kong or even die recently as a martyr', I couldn't get out of it. i became more and more miserable and, oh, SO HUNGRY FRO FREEDOM AND VICTORY.
AT LAST I BECAME DESPERATE. the last night of the convention i saw it was a clean-cut, unconditional surrender, or continued wandering in failure, defeat and dissatisfaction. I left the meeting and went down to the shore, and there under a clear sky and shining stars I MADE THE COMPLETE UNCONDITIONAL SURRENDER. i cried out,
'COME IN. COME IN, HOLY SPIRIT.
THY WORK OF GREAT BLESSING BEGIN.
BY FAITH I LAY HOLD OF THE PROMISE AND CLAIM COMPLETE VICTORY OVER SIN'.
Hallelujah! what a thrill, what a peace, what a joy! although an old-fashioned Presbyterian I began to weep and sin and rejoice like an old-fashioned Free Methodist. when I came home, I told my mother, 'the surrender has been made, and I am free and so happy'. she was delighted, for she told me she wondered whether i was really saved or not. she knew the blessing, for she had received it under the Rev. Andrew Murray's preaching held in a convention in Belfast. the wonder to me was that all of the far of what men might say or do had vanished and now i was willing to do anything or go anywhere. the very thing I dreaded most before receiving the blessing, about the Salvation Army meeting, was faced. i couldn't say i was very happy about it; but I TOLD THE LORD I WOULD DO WHAT HE WANTED, COST WHAT IT MAY. so i went to the open-air meeting on a Sat night....
as I walked down the street that Sat it seemed as if every friend and relative I ever had were out and about. when
*133 I came to the open-air meeting and saw the two wee Salvation Army girls singing and rattling their tambourines and poor Daft Jimmy holding the flag. I nearly turned back. talk about dying! I was dying hard that night. I stepped off the footpath and stood in the ring. the soldier looked at me. then to my horror one of them sad, 'the people don't stop and listen: let us get down on our knees and pray' what could I do? I couldn't run away. so down I got on my knees.
the crowd gathered around. I could hear their laughter and jeers. the officer prayed a telegram prayer - short and to the point. I could have wished the prayer had been as long as the 110th psalm. I stood up, blushing and nervous. they go the collection while the crowd was there and then to my horror, she said, 'bother! take this tambourine and lead the march down the street to the Barracks'. I couldn't let a girl beat me, so I took it. THAT DID IT. MY SHACKLES FELL OFF AND I - WAS - FREE; MY FEARS ALL GONE.
I started down the street, whether in the body or out of the body, i can't tell. I LOST MY REPUTATION and the fear of man and found the joy and peace of the overflowing fullness of the Spirit. Hallelujah!'
on street corners and in cottages, in the city and in the villages, in his place of employment on the railroad and in the churches, Nich became a fearless and flaming winner of souls. because of his enthusiasm and effectiveness he was advised by earnest friends to prepare for Christian work. his new friend, Stuart Holden, advised him not to be in a hurry;
*134 rather, to wait on God until a door for Bible preparation would be opened
a glimpse of his service in those days is this reminiscence; 'every Sun I held a meeting in a wee Orange Hall in a village a few miles from Bangor. I visited every home every Sun before the service, inviting them to come to my meeting. i prayed with everyone who would allow me and left a Spurgeon sermon. one dear old lady sitting at the door of her thatched cottage, when asked to come to my service, said, 'God love you, Mr. Nicholson, I don't need to go because you speak so loud the whole village can hear you'. my seafaring life gave me a good voice, so when I got warmed up preaching, you could hear me a mile away or more.
in His won way and time the almighty led His young servant to the Bible Training Institute in Glasgow. under godly and gifted instructors he was taught the wonders of the Scriptures. the Bible became his only textbook and witnessing for the Savior and winning souls his greatest delight. after Bible School days he became an evangelist for the lanakshire Christian union, an interdenominational society of leading Christian businessmen in that part of Scotland. Evangelistic services were held in the coal mining villages during the winter and tent campaigns wer held in the summertime. ther the Lord gave him great favor among the people. many came to a saving knowledge of the Lord jesus and many yielded themselves fully to the Savior and became Spirit-filled, soul-saving Christians.
born in county Down near Bangor, in North Ireland, he seemed destined to follow the sea. his father was a sea captain in the golden age of sailing ships during the second half of the 19th century and he took his laddie for his first voyage when the latter was only 6 years of age. to this day. Nich has a painting of his father's barque, The Muriel, fully rigged, with every sail set and although the evangelist is now in his eighties, sea fever rises deep within him as he contemplates that ship. could it be that far distant in his background is the heritage of the Vikings, those restless, fearless, ea raiders who ravaged the coasts of Ireland in medieval times? Could be.
school books and common place employment on the land had no place in young William's thinking; so at 15 he sailed away from home as an apprentice seaman, he recalls:
'it was a hard and harsh training. it either made you or broke you. yet I loved it, especially up aloft during the gale of wind - the wind shrieking through the rigging and the ship rolling from side to side, the seas like miniature mountains. it intoxicated me. food was scarce - tough salt beef and salt pork and Liverpool pantiles for biscuits. the regular hours,
*128 fresh air and hard work and instant obedience made you healthy, if mostly unhappy'.
but the Irish sailor lad was taken from the sea to become a fisher of men as dramatically, if not more so, than was Peter of bethsida long ago. on one voyage with a cargo of coal, , the ship on which he sailed ran into a terrific northeaster in the 'roaring forties' after rounding cape Horn. in the tempest the ship tossed and rolled as if it would go under and the cargo began to shift. with mast broken and sails in wreckage there seemed to be no hope. by morning, another sailing ship came near; but the half-frozen men of Nich's ship did not dare jump into the sea because they knew they could never reach the lifeboat. thereupon, the other ship sailed away and left them to their doom.
the crew, however, was able to break into the hold and shift the cargo until the ship righted itself. with what rigging was left they were able to turn back around Cape Horn and reached the Falkland Islands.
the cry to God for mercy made by the crew members, including Nich, when in their extremity, meant nothing to them once they were again in safety. snatched from the sea, but not saved!
after completing his apprenticeship and working for some time on railroad construction in South Africa, he returned home. it was there by the fireside on the morning of May 22, 1899, that he was snatched the second time 'from the sea'; and that time he was really saved. while reading the morning paper and smoking and awaiting the breakfast being prepared by his godly mother, he heard suddenly and without warning, a voice saying, 'Now or never. You must decide to accept or to reject Christ'. in that moment, trembling with fear, he cried out, 'lord, I yield. i repent of all my sin and now accept Thee as my Savior'.
*129 he recalls, 'suddenly and powerfully and consciously, I was saved. such a peace and freedom from fear, such a sweet and sure assurance filled my soul. i turned to my mother and said, 'mother, i am saved. she looked at me and nearly collapsed and said, 'when? I said, 'Just now. 'where? 'here, where i am sitting. she cried with joy unspeakable. she couldn't say a word, but just hugged me and cried.
William Nicholson had been saved and he knew it. 'I have never had any doubts about my salvation, he declares. 'the Blood had been applied and the Spirit answered to the Blood. I never doubted about my dear mother's word about my natural birth and do you think it's strange of me to take God's word without a doubt or fear? i became a new creature and began hating sin. I tried hard to love God, the Bible, the church and prayer; but what a failure I made of it.
the crisis of the deeper life, with the enduement of the Holy Spirit for service, came to young Nich a few months after his conversion.. it is best to let an irishman tell his own story, so here it is.
'the peace and joy and assurance continued, but in a fluctuating way. sometimes doubting, sometimes trusting, sometimes joyful, sometimes sad. all grosser sins dropped off me and I had no sorrow about it or any bother with them, but the sins of the flesh and the spirit continue to plague me greatly: envy, jealousy, malice, hatred. i could crush them down, but they continued to rise up again, more vigorous than ever.
the fear of man was a dreadful snare and i was helplessly caught by it. I was ashamed of Christ and ashamed of being seen with out-and-out Christians. I was a sneak and a coward, if ever there was one. I despised myself, bu was helpless about it....
I attended church twice every Sun and joined the men's Bible class. I read my Bible but didn't get any good out of it, and had little or no desire for it. prayer was a real
*130 penance and seemingly useless. what a wretched, miserable experience i was passing through!
I lived in this distracted state for nearly 7 months after my conversion. some have told me I wasn't converted at all - that i only thought i was. but they were wrong. I was truly born again and a new creature in Jesus Christ. I had the inward witness clear and the outward evidence that i was a changed man....i hated sin, but was continually overcome by it. I love holiness and longed to be perfectly whole, but never experienced it. i was truly a child of God, but a slave of the devil. my life was up and down, but more down that up. i was committing sin and confessing it, but rarely having victory over it. I believed there was deliverance for me, but how to obtain it I didn't know.
i knew some Christians who were living a victorious, joyous, soul-winning life. how i envied them! i am sure if I had only made known to them the fluctuating, failing kind of life i was living, they would have led me into the open secret; but i was ashamed to make my experience known....
thank God, the day of my deliverance was at hand. one of the leading businessmen of the town, an out-and-out man fro Christ and souls, arranged for a 'Convention for the Deepening of the Christian Life. ' my older brother James and a close friend of his in his student days,Rev. J. Stuart Holden, were the convention leaders.
if they had called the conference 'holiness meetings' I would have been frightened and would never have attended. i would have called them wild , blue-stokinged Presbyterian, I would have shunned them.
from the very first sermon I heard, I was sure my brother had told Holden about me, for he made public my miserable condition. it made me feel clean mad! i determined i would
*131 not go to another service; but I was there the next night. I was more sure than ever that my brother had put the preacher up to preach at me. I became more angry every night, but could not keep myself from attendance.
Stuart Holden made the secret of the victorious Christian life so clear and plain. after one has been born again by the spirit of God he can live victoriously only by the holy Spirit. i began to understand that i could not attain this life by self effort or ceremonies, for it was 'not by might nor by power, but by the Spirit'. it was not an ATTAINMENT, but and OBTAINMENT. Christ was God's unspeakable gift to the world. The Holy Spirit was Christ's gift to His church. i had been trying to do what the Holy Spirit Alone could and would, do for me. but i must receive him by faith, on the ground of grace and he would sanctify my heart, and apply the Blood, thus cleansing me from all sin and making the victory purchased by Christ on Calvary experiential. as i walked in the light as he was in the light, he would maintain the life of holiness and victory in my life day by day.
it was all so wonderful and new to me. I had never heard such truth before. Oh, how my heart ached for just such a life, but I was hindered by fear of the consequences. I didn't want to be anything or do anything a presbyterian ought not to be or do. I tried so hard to make the Lord see and understand my fears and feelings, but he had no sympathy for my fears. i couldn't make Him a Presbyterian!
the Salvation Army had come to our town. the Corps was composed of two wee girls in uniform. they held open-air meetings and made a noise with their tambourines. their first soldier was a man called Daft Jimmy. he carried the flag as they marched the streets. on his jersey, a red one, he had hardly enough brains to give him a headache, but he had sense enough to get saved. he carried the flag as they marched the streets. on his jersey, a red one, he had the women put with white yarn these words on his back, 'SAVED FROM PUBLIC OPINION'.
*132 'I was told by satan that i would have to go to the open-air meeting and march down the street with two wee girls and a fool. maybe that didn't fill me with horrible dread! I would be laughed at by all my friends. i would lose my reputation.
i said, 'Lord, I will be willing to go to Timbuctoo or Hong Kong or even die recently as a martyr', I couldn't get out of it. i became more and more miserable and, oh, SO HUNGRY FRO FREEDOM AND VICTORY.
AT LAST I BECAME DESPERATE. the last night of the convention i saw it was a clean-cut, unconditional surrender, or continued wandering in failure, defeat and dissatisfaction. I left the meeting and went down to the shore, and there under a clear sky and shining stars I MADE THE COMPLETE UNCONDITIONAL SURRENDER. i cried out,
'COME IN. COME IN, HOLY SPIRIT.
THY WORK OF GREAT BLESSING BEGIN.
BY FAITH I LAY HOLD OF THE PROMISE AND CLAIM COMPLETE VICTORY OVER SIN'.
Hallelujah! what a thrill, what a peace, what a joy! although an old-fashioned Presbyterian I began to weep and sin and rejoice like an old-fashioned Free Methodist. when I came home, I told my mother, 'the surrender has been made, and I am free and so happy'. she was delighted, for she told me she wondered whether i was really saved or not. she knew the blessing, for she had received it under the Rev. Andrew Murray's preaching held in a convention in Belfast. the wonder to me was that all of the far of what men might say or do had vanished and now i was willing to do anything or go anywhere. the very thing I dreaded most before receiving the blessing, about the Salvation Army meeting, was faced. i couldn't say i was very happy about it; but I TOLD THE LORD I WOULD DO WHAT HE WANTED, COST WHAT IT MAY. so i went to the open-air meeting on a Sat night....
as I walked down the street that Sat it seemed as if every friend and relative I ever had were out and about. when
*133 I came to the open-air meeting and saw the two wee Salvation Army girls singing and rattling their tambourines and poor Daft Jimmy holding the flag. I nearly turned back. talk about dying! I was dying hard that night. I stepped off the footpath and stood in the ring. the soldier looked at me. then to my horror one of them sad, 'the people don't stop and listen: let us get down on our knees and pray' what could I do? I couldn't run away. so down I got on my knees.
the crowd gathered around. I could hear their laughter and jeers. the officer prayed a telegram prayer - short and to the point. I could have wished the prayer had been as long as the 110th psalm. I stood up, blushing and nervous. they go the collection while the crowd was there and then to my horror, she said, 'bother! take this tambourine and lead the march down the street to the Barracks'. I couldn't let a girl beat me, so I took it. THAT DID IT. MY SHACKLES FELL OFF AND I - WAS - FREE; MY FEARS ALL GONE.
I started down the street, whether in the body or out of the body, i can't tell. I LOST MY REPUTATION and the fear of man and found the joy and peace of the overflowing fullness of the Spirit. Hallelujah!'
on street corners and in cottages, in the city and in the villages, in his place of employment on the railroad and in the churches, Nich became a fearless and flaming winner of souls. because of his enthusiasm and effectiveness he was advised by earnest friends to prepare for Christian work. his new friend, Stuart Holden, advised him not to be in a hurry;
*134 rather, to wait on God until a door for Bible preparation would be opened
a glimpse of his service in those days is this reminiscence; 'every Sun I held a meeting in a wee Orange Hall in a village a few miles from Bangor. I visited every home every Sun before the service, inviting them to come to my meeting. i prayed with everyone who would allow me and left a Spurgeon sermon. one dear old lady sitting at the door of her thatched cottage, when asked to come to my service, said, 'God love you, Mr. Nicholson, I don't need to go because you speak so loud the whole village can hear you'. my seafaring life gave me a good voice, so when I got warmed up preaching, you could hear me a mile away or more.
in His won way and time the almighty led His young servant to the Bible Training Institute in Glasgow. under godly and gifted instructors he was taught the wonders of the Scriptures. the Bible became his only textbook and witnessing for the Savior and winning souls his greatest delight. after Bible School days he became an evangelist for the lanakshire Christian union, an interdenominational society of leading Christian businessmen in that part of Scotland. Evangelistic services were held in the coal mining villages during the winter and tent campaigns wer held in the summertime. ther the Lord gave him great favor among the people. many came to a saving knowledge of the Lord jesus and many yielded themselves fully to the Savior and became Spirit-filled, soul-saving Christians.
6.29.2018 TFTS - Adoniram Judson Gordon - The Disciplined life
*75 ....so on the day of Pentecost the Holy Spirit, as the Comforter, advocate, Helper and Teacher and Guide, was given to the church. the disciples who before had been regenerated by the spirit, as is commonly held, now received the Holy Ghost to qualify and empower than for service. it was another and higher experience than that which they had hitherto known. it is the difference between the Holy Spirit for renewal and the Holy Spirit for ministry. even Jesus, begotten by the Holy Ghost and therefore called 'the son of God', did not enter upon His public service till he had been 'anointed' or 'sealed' with that same Spirit through whom he had been begotten. so of his immediate apostles; so of paul, who had been converted on the way to Damascus. so of the others mentioned in the acts, as the Samaritan Christians and the Ephesian disciples (19.1-8). and not a few thoughtful students of Scripture maintain that the same order still holds good: that there is such a thing as receiving the Holy Ghost in order to qualify for service. it is not denied that many may have this blessing in immediate connection with their conversion, from
*76 which it need not necessarily be separated. only let it be marked that as the giving of the Spirit by the Father is plainly spoken of, so distinctly is the receiving of the Spirit on the part spoken of, so distinctly is the receiving of the spirit on the part of the disciples constantly named in Scripture...
'God forbid, said Gordon, that we should lay claim to any higher attainment that the humblest. we are simply trying to answer, as best we may from Scripture, the question asked above about the baptism of the Holy Ghost. on the whole and after prolonged study of the Scripture, we cannot resist this conviction: As Christ, the second person of the Godhead, came to earth to make atonement for sin and to give eternal life and as sinners must receive him by faith in order to have forgiveness and Sonship, so the Holy Spirit, the third person of the godhead, came to the earth to communicate the 'power from on high' and we must as believers in like manner receive Him by faith in order to be qualified for service. both gifts have been bestowed, but it is not what we have but what we know that we have by a conscious appropriating faith, which determines our spiritual wealth. why then should we be satisfied with 'the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace' (Eph 1.7), when the Lord would grant us also 'according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man? Ephesians 3.16
..Dr. Gordon gave ..illustration: 'Just in front of the study window whee I write is a street, above which i is said that a powerful electric current is constantly moving. i cannot see that current; it does not report itself to hearing, or sight, or taste, or smell, and so far as the testimony of the senses is to be taken, I might reasonably discredit its existence. but i see a slender arm, called the trolley, reaching up and touching it and immediately the car with its heavy load of passengers moves along the track as though
*77 seized in the grasp of some might giant. the power had been there before, only now the car lays hold of it or is rather laid hold of by it, since it was a touch, not a rip, through which the motion was communicated. and would it be presumptuous for one to say that he had known something of a similar contact with not merely a divine force but a divine person? the change which ensued may be described thus: instead of praying constantly for the descent of a divine and ever-present being; instead of a constant effort to make use of the Holy spirit for doing my work there arose a clear and abiding conviction that the true secret of service lay in so yielding to the Holy Spirit that he might use me to do His work...'
the dynamic for discipleship is indeed the gift of God, even the Holy Spirit; yet it is costly to our human nature, even death to self.
it costs much, said Dr. Gordon in one of these convention addresses, 'to obtain this power. it costs self-surrender and humiliation and the yielding up of our most precious things to God. it consists the perseverance, of long waiting and the faith of strong trust. but when we are really in that power, we shall find this difference: that, whereas before it was hard for us to do the easiest things, now it is easy for us to do the hardest'.
...'as we become deeply instructed in this matter, we shall learn to pray less about the details of duty and more about the fullness of power. the manufacturer is chiefly anxious to secure an ample head of water for his mills; and, this being found, he knows that his 10,000 spindles will deep in motion without particular attention to each one. it is, in like manner, the sources of our power for which we should be most solicitous and not the results'.
This Is The Dynamic For Discipleship!
*76 which it need not necessarily be separated. only let it be marked that as the giving of the Spirit by the Father is plainly spoken of, so distinctly is the receiving of the Spirit on the part spoken of, so distinctly is the receiving of the spirit on the part of the disciples constantly named in Scripture...
'God forbid, said Gordon, that we should lay claim to any higher attainment that the humblest. we are simply trying to answer, as best we may from Scripture, the question asked above about the baptism of the Holy Ghost. on the whole and after prolonged study of the Scripture, we cannot resist this conviction: As Christ, the second person of the Godhead, came to earth to make atonement for sin and to give eternal life and as sinners must receive him by faith in order to have forgiveness and Sonship, so the Holy Spirit, the third person of the godhead, came to the earth to communicate the 'power from on high' and we must as believers in like manner receive Him by faith in order to be qualified for service. both gifts have been bestowed, but it is not what we have but what we know that we have by a conscious appropriating faith, which determines our spiritual wealth. why then should we be satisfied with 'the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace' (Eph 1.7), when the Lord would grant us also 'according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might by His Spirit in the inner man? Ephesians 3.16
..Dr. Gordon gave ..illustration: 'Just in front of the study window whee I write is a street, above which i is said that a powerful electric current is constantly moving. i cannot see that current; it does not report itself to hearing, or sight, or taste, or smell, and so far as the testimony of the senses is to be taken, I might reasonably discredit its existence. but i see a slender arm, called the trolley, reaching up and touching it and immediately the car with its heavy load of passengers moves along the track as though
*77 seized in the grasp of some might giant. the power had been there before, only now the car lays hold of it or is rather laid hold of by it, since it was a touch, not a rip, through which the motion was communicated. and would it be presumptuous for one to say that he had known something of a similar contact with not merely a divine force but a divine person? the change which ensued may be described thus: instead of praying constantly for the descent of a divine and ever-present being; instead of a constant effort to make use of the Holy spirit for doing my work there arose a clear and abiding conviction that the true secret of service lay in so yielding to the Holy Spirit that he might use me to do His work...'
the dynamic for discipleship is indeed the gift of God, even the Holy Spirit; yet it is costly to our human nature, even death to self.
it costs much, said Dr. Gordon in one of these convention addresses, 'to obtain this power. it costs self-surrender and humiliation and the yielding up of our most precious things to God. it consists the perseverance, of long waiting and the faith of strong trust. but when we are really in that power, we shall find this difference: that, whereas before it was hard for us to do the easiest things, now it is easy for us to do the hardest'.
...'as we become deeply instructed in this matter, we shall learn to pray less about the details of duty and more about the fullness of power. the manufacturer is chiefly anxious to secure an ample head of water for his mills; and, this being found, he knows that his 10,000 spindles will deep in motion without particular attention to each one. it is, in like manner, the sources of our power for which we should be most solicitous and not the results'.
This Is The Dynamic For Discipleship!
Thursday, June 28, 2018
6.28.2018 TFTS - Charles Grandison Finney, The Powerful Life
a farmer lad on fire, an Elijah among lawyers, a pungent and powerful preacher of penitence, such was Charles G. Finney. born in rural Connecticut after the Revolutionary War, reared in a backwoods area of central New York State, he was successively a school teacher and a lawyer before he became a preacher of the Gospel.
Finney's conversion was sudden, startling, dramatic, and dynamic. through his youth he had received so little Christian instruction that at the age of 29 he found himself as ignorant of the gospel as a heathen. he did not understand Bible terms and although some believers labored to show him Christian doctrine he was not convinced. nevertheless he believed the Bible to be the Word of God. that confidence led him to a reading of the Scriptures, which in turn gave him concern about the salvation of his soul.
of his tremendous sense of need, his despair and of overwhelming victory, F tells his own story far better than anyone else could. 'On a Sabbath evening in the autumn of 1821, I made up my mind that i would settle the question of my soul's salvation at once, that if it were possible I would make my peace with god. but as I was very busy in the affairs of the office, i knew that without great firmness of purpose, I should never effectually attend to the subject. I therefor then and there resolved, as far as possible, to avoid all business and
*60 everything that would divert my attention and to give myself wholly to the work of securing the salvation of my soul. I carried this resolution into execution as sternly and thoroughly as i could. I was, however, obliged to be a good deal in the office. but as the providence of God would have it, I was not much occupied either on Mon or Tues and had opportunity to read my Bible and engage in prayer most of the time...
during Mon and Tues y convictions increased, but still it seemed as if my heart grew harder. I could not shed a tear; i could not pray. i had not opportunity to pray above my breath and frequently I felt that if i could be alone where i could use my voice and let myself out, I should find relief in prayer. I was shy and avoided, as much as i could , speaking to anybody on any subject. I endeavored, however, to do this in a way that would excite no suspicion, in any mind, that i was seeking the salvation of my soul.
Tues night I had became very nervous and in the night a strange feeling came over me as if I was about to die. I knew that if I did i should sink down to hell; but i quieted myself as best I could until morning.
at an early hour i started for the office. but just before i arrived at the office, something seemed to confront me with questions like these: indeed, it seemed as if the inquiry was within myself, as if an inward voice said to me, 'What are you waiting for? did you not promise to give your heart to do? and what are you trying to do? are you endeavoring to work out a righteousness of your own?
just at this point the whole question of gospel salvation opened to my mind in a manner most marvelous to me at the time. I think I then saw, as clearly as I ever have in my life, the reality and fullness of the atonement of Christ. I saw that His work was a finished work and then instead of having or needing, any righteousness of my own to recommend me to God, I
*61 had to submit myself to the righteousness of God through Christ. Gospel salvation seemed to me to be an offer of something to be accepted and that it was full and complete and that all that was necessary on my part, was to get me own consent to give up my sins and accept Christ. salvation, it seemed to me, instead of being a thing to be wrought out, by my own works consent to give up my sins and accept Christ. salvation, it seemed to me, instead of being a thing to be wrought out, by my own works, was a thing to be found entirely in the Lord Jesus Christ, who presented Himself before me as my God and my Savior.
without being distinctly aware of it, I had stopped in the street right where the inward voice seemed to arrest me. how long i remained in that position I cannot say. but after this distinct revelation had stood for some little time before my mind, the question seemed to be put, 'will you accept it now, today?' i replied, 'yes; I will accept it today or I will die in the attempt'.
North of the village and over a hill, lay a piece of woods, in which i was in the almost daily habit of walking, more or less, when it was pleasant weather, it was now oct and the time was past for my frequent walks there. nevertheless instead of going to the office, I turned and bent my course towards the woods, feeling that i must be alone and away from all human eyes and ears, so that i could pour out my prayer to God...
but when I attempted to pray I found that my heart would not pray. i had supposed that if I could only be where i could speak aloud, without being overheard, I could pray freely.but lo1 when I cam to try, I was dumb, that is, I had nothing to say to God or at least i could say but a few words, and those without hear. in attempting to pray i would hear a rustling in the leaves, as i thought and would stop and look up to see if somebody were not coming. this i did several times.
finally I found myself verging fast to despair. I said to myself, 'i cannot pray. y heart is dead to God and will not
*62 pray.' I then reproached myself for having promised to give my heart to God before I left the woods. when i came to pray, i found I could not give my heart to God. my inward soul hung back and there was no going out of my heart to God. I began to feel deeply that it was too late, that it must be that i was given up of god and was past hope.
the thought was pressing me of the rashness of my promise,that i would give my heart to God that day or die in thee attempt. it seemed to me as if that was biding upon my soul and yet i was going to break my vow. a great sinking and discouragement came over me and i felt almost too weak to stand upon my knees.
just at this moment I again thought i heard someone approach me and i opened my eyes to see whether it were so. but right there the revelation of my pride of heart, as the great difficulty that stood in the way, was distinctly shown to me. an overwhelming sense of my wickedness in being ashamed to have a human being see me on my knees before god, took such powerful possession of me,that i cried at the top of my voice, and exclaimed that i would not leave that place if all the men on earth and all the devils in hell surrounded me. 'What!' i said, such a degraded sinner as i am, on my knees confessing sins to the great and holy God and ashamed to have any human being and a sinner like myself, find me on my knees endeavoring to make my peace with my offended God!' the sin appeared awful, infinite. it broke me down before the lord.
just at that point this passage of Scripture seemed to drop into my mind with a flood of light: the Shall Ye Go And Pray Unto Me, And I Will Hearken Unto You. The Shall Ye Seek Me And Find Me, When Ye Shall Search for Me With All Your Heart.. I instantly seized hold of this with my heart. i had intellectually believed the Bible before, but never had the truth been in my mind that faith was a voluntary trust instead of an intellectual
*63 state. i was as conscious as i was of my existence, of trusting at that moment in god's veracity. somehow, I knew that that was a passage of Scripture, though i do not think I had ever read it. I knew that it was god's word and god's voice, as it were, that spoke to me, i cried to Him ,'LORD, I TAKE THEE AT THEY WORD. now Thou knowest that i do search for Thee with all my heart, and that i have come here to pray to thee and Thou hast promised to hear me.
that seemed to settle the question that i could then, that day, perform my vow. the Spirit seemed to lay stress upon that idea in the test, When You Search for Me With All Your Heart. the question of when,that is, of the present time, seemed to fall heavily into my heart. i told the lord that i should take him at his word; that he could not lie and that therefore I was sure that he heard my prayer and that He would be found of me...I walked quietly toward the village and so perfectly quiet was my mind that it seemed as if all nature listened, it was on the 10th of Oct, and a very pleasant day. i had gone into the woods immediately after a early breakfast and when i returned to the village i found it was dinner time. yet i had been wholly unconscious of the time that had passed; it appeared to me that i had been gone from the village but a short time....
i went to my diner and found i had no appetite to eat. i then went to the office and found that Squire W====had gone to dinner.I took down my bass viol and, as i was accustomed to do, began to play and sing some pieces of sacred music. but as soon as i began to sing those sacred words, i began to weep. it seemed as if my heart was all liquid and my feelings were in such a state that i could not hear my own voice in singing without causing my sensibility to overflow. i wondered at this, and tried to suppress my tears, but could not. i put up my instrument and stopped singing.
*64 after dinner we were engaged in removing our books and furniture to another office. we were busy in this and had but little conversation all the afternoon.my mind,however, remained in that profoundly tranquil state. there was a great sweetness and tenderness in my thoughts and feeling. everything appeared to be going right and nothing seemed to ruffle or disturb me in the least.
just before evening the thought took possession of my mind, that as soon as i was left alone in the new office, i would try to pray again - that i was not going to abandon thee subject of religion and give it up, at any rate and therefore, although i no longer had any concern about my soul. still i would continue to pray.
by evening we got the books and furniture adjusted and i made up, in an open fireplace, a good fire, hoping to spend thee evening alone, just as dark Squire W---, seeing that everything was adjusted, bade me good-night and went to his home. i had accompanied him to the door and as i closed the door and turned around, my heart seemed to be liquid within me. all my feelings seemed to rise and flow out and the utterance of my heart was, 'I WANT TO POUR MY WHOLE SOUL OUT TO GOD. the rising of my soul was so great that i rushed into the room back of the front office, to pray.
there was no fire and no light,in the room; nevertheless it appeared to me as if it were perfectly light. as i went in and shut the door after me, it seemed as if I met the Lord Jesus Christ face to face. it did not occur to me then, nor did it for some time afterward, that it was wholly a mental state. on the contrary,it seemed to me that i saw Him as i would see any other man. he said nothing, but looked at me in such a manner as to break me right down at his feet. i have always since regarded this as a most remarkable state of mind; for it seemed to me a reality, that He stood before me and i fell down at His
*65 feet and poured out my soul to Him. I wept aloud like a child and made such confessions as i could with a choked utterance. it seemed to me that I bathed His feet with my tears and yet i had no distinct impression that i touched Him, that i recollect.
i must have continued in this state for a good while, but my mind was too much absorbed with the interview to recollect anything that i said. but I know,as soon as my mind became calm enough to break off from the interview, I returned to the front office and found that the fire that i had made of large wood was nearly burned out. but as i turned and was about to take a seat by the fire, i received a mighty baptism of the Holy ghost. without any expectation of it, without ever having the thought in my mind that there was any such thing for me, without any recollection that i had ever heard the thing mentioned by any person in the world,the Holy Spirit descended upon my in a manner that seemed to go through me,body and soul. i could feel the impression, like a wave of electricity, going through and through me. indeed,it seemed to come in waves and waves of liquid love; for i could not express it in any other way. it seemed like the very breath of God, i can recollect distinctly that it seemed to fan me, like immense wings.
no words can express the wonderful love hat was shed abroad in my heart. i wept aloud with joy and love and i do not know but I should say, i literally bellowed out he unutterable gushings of my heart. these waves came over me and over me and over me, one after the other, until I recollect i cried out, 'i shall die if these waves continue to pass over me'. i said,'lord, I cannot bear any more' , yet I had no fear of death.
how long I continued in this state, with this baptism continuing to roll over me and go through me, I do not know. but i know it was late in the evening when a member of my choir - for i was the leader of the choir - came into the office to see
*66 me. he was a member of the church. he found me in this state of loud weeping and said to me, 'Mr. Finney, what ails you/ I could make him no answer for some time. he then said, 'are you in pain? i gathered myself up as best I could and replied, 'No, but so happy that i cannot live....
i soon fell asleep, but almost as soon awoke again on account of the great flow of the love of God that was in my heart. I was so filled with love that i could not sleep. soon I fell asleep again and awoke in the same manner. when i awoke, this temptation would return upon me and the love that seemed to e in my heart would abate; but as soon as I was asleep, it was so warm within me that i would immediately awake. thus i continued till, late at night. I obtained some sound repose.
when I awoke in the morning the sun had risen and was pouring a clear light into my room. words cannot express the impression that this sunlight made upon me. instantly the baptism that i had received the night before returned upon me in the same manner. I arose upon my knees in the bed and wept aloud with joy and remained for some time too much overwhelmed with the baptism of the Spirit to do anything but pour out my soul to God. it seemed as if this morning's baptism was accompanied with a gentle reproof and the Spirit seemed to say to me, 'Will you doubt? will you doubt? I cried, 'No! i will not doubt; i cannot doubt'. He then cleared the subject up so much to my mind that it was in fact impossible for me to doubt that the Spirit of God had taken possession of my soul.
in this state i was taught the doctrine of justification by faith, as a present experience. that doctrine had never taken any such possession of my mind that i had ever viewed it distinctly as a fundamental doctrine of the gospel. indeed, I did not know at all what it meant in the proper sense. but i could now see and understand what was meant by the passage,
*67 'Being justified by faith we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ'. I could see that the moment I believed, while up in the woods, all sense of condemnation had entirely dropped out of my mind and that from that moment i could not feel a sense of guilt or condemnation by any effort that i could make. my sense of guilt was gone; my sins were gone; and I do not thin I felt any more sense of guilt that if i never had sinned.
by the Spirit of God Finney came under deep conviction, learned god's plan of salvation and was born again of the Spirit; then without his knowledge of any such experience was filled to overflowing with that Spirit!
Finney's conversion was sudden, startling, dramatic, and dynamic. through his youth he had received so little Christian instruction that at the age of 29 he found himself as ignorant of the gospel as a heathen. he did not understand Bible terms and although some believers labored to show him Christian doctrine he was not convinced. nevertheless he believed the Bible to be the Word of God. that confidence led him to a reading of the Scriptures, which in turn gave him concern about the salvation of his soul.
of his tremendous sense of need, his despair and of overwhelming victory, F tells his own story far better than anyone else could. 'On a Sabbath evening in the autumn of 1821, I made up my mind that i would settle the question of my soul's salvation at once, that if it were possible I would make my peace with god. but as I was very busy in the affairs of the office, i knew that without great firmness of purpose, I should never effectually attend to the subject. I therefor then and there resolved, as far as possible, to avoid all business and
*60 everything that would divert my attention and to give myself wholly to the work of securing the salvation of my soul. I carried this resolution into execution as sternly and thoroughly as i could. I was, however, obliged to be a good deal in the office. but as the providence of God would have it, I was not much occupied either on Mon or Tues and had opportunity to read my Bible and engage in prayer most of the time...
during Mon and Tues y convictions increased, but still it seemed as if my heart grew harder. I could not shed a tear; i could not pray. i had not opportunity to pray above my breath and frequently I felt that if i could be alone where i could use my voice and let myself out, I should find relief in prayer. I was shy and avoided, as much as i could , speaking to anybody on any subject. I endeavored, however, to do this in a way that would excite no suspicion, in any mind, that i was seeking the salvation of my soul.
Tues night I had became very nervous and in the night a strange feeling came over me as if I was about to die. I knew that if I did i should sink down to hell; but i quieted myself as best I could until morning.
at an early hour i started for the office. but just before i arrived at the office, something seemed to confront me with questions like these: indeed, it seemed as if the inquiry was within myself, as if an inward voice said to me, 'What are you waiting for? did you not promise to give your heart to do? and what are you trying to do? are you endeavoring to work out a righteousness of your own?
just at this point the whole question of gospel salvation opened to my mind in a manner most marvelous to me at the time. I think I then saw, as clearly as I ever have in my life, the reality and fullness of the atonement of Christ. I saw that His work was a finished work and then instead of having or needing, any righteousness of my own to recommend me to God, I
*61 had to submit myself to the righteousness of God through Christ. Gospel salvation seemed to me to be an offer of something to be accepted and that it was full and complete and that all that was necessary on my part, was to get me own consent to give up my sins and accept Christ. salvation, it seemed to me, instead of being a thing to be wrought out, by my own works consent to give up my sins and accept Christ. salvation, it seemed to me, instead of being a thing to be wrought out, by my own works, was a thing to be found entirely in the Lord Jesus Christ, who presented Himself before me as my God and my Savior.
without being distinctly aware of it, I had stopped in the street right where the inward voice seemed to arrest me. how long i remained in that position I cannot say. but after this distinct revelation had stood for some little time before my mind, the question seemed to be put, 'will you accept it now, today?' i replied, 'yes; I will accept it today or I will die in the attempt'.
North of the village and over a hill, lay a piece of woods, in which i was in the almost daily habit of walking, more or less, when it was pleasant weather, it was now oct and the time was past for my frequent walks there. nevertheless instead of going to the office, I turned and bent my course towards the woods, feeling that i must be alone and away from all human eyes and ears, so that i could pour out my prayer to God...
but when I attempted to pray I found that my heart would not pray. i had supposed that if I could only be where i could speak aloud, without being overheard, I could pray freely.but lo1 when I cam to try, I was dumb, that is, I had nothing to say to God or at least i could say but a few words, and those without hear. in attempting to pray i would hear a rustling in the leaves, as i thought and would stop and look up to see if somebody were not coming. this i did several times.
finally I found myself verging fast to despair. I said to myself, 'i cannot pray. y heart is dead to God and will not
*62 pray.' I then reproached myself for having promised to give my heart to God before I left the woods. when i came to pray, i found I could not give my heart to God. my inward soul hung back and there was no going out of my heart to God. I began to feel deeply that it was too late, that it must be that i was given up of god and was past hope.
the thought was pressing me of the rashness of my promise,that i would give my heart to God that day or die in thee attempt. it seemed to me as if that was biding upon my soul and yet i was going to break my vow. a great sinking and discouragement came over me and i felt almost too weak to stand upon my knees.
just at this moment I again thought i heard someone approach me and i opened my eyes to see whether it were so. but right there the revelation of my pride of heart, as the great difficulty that stood in the way, was distinctly shown to me. an overwhelming sense of my wickedness in being ashamed to have a human being see me on my knees before god, took such powerful possession of me,that i cried at the top of my voice, and exclaimed that i would not leave that place if all the men on earth and all the devils in hell surrounded me. 'What!' i said, such a degraded sinner as i am, on my knees confessing sins to the great and holy God and ashamed to have any human being and a sinner like myself, find me on my knees endeavoring to make my peace with my offended God!' the sin appeared awful, infinite. it broke me down before the lord.
just at that point this passage of Scripture seemed to drop into my mind with a flood of light: the Shall Ye Go And Pray Unto Me, And I Will Hearken Unto You. The Shall Ye Seek Me And Find Me, When Ye Shall Search for Me With All Your Heart.. I instantly seized hold of this with my heart. i had intellectually believed the Bible before, but never had the truth been in my mind that faith was a voluntary trust instead of an intellectual
*63 state. i was as conscious as i was of my existence, of trusting at that moment in god's veracity. somehow, I knew that that was a passage of Scripture, though i do not think I had ever read it. I knew that it was god's word and god's voice, as it were, that spoke to me, i cried to Him ,'LORD, I TAKE THEE AT THEY WORD. now Thou knowest that i do search for Thee with all my heart, and that i have come here to pray to thee and Thou hast promised to hear me.
that seemed to settle the question that i could then, that day, perform my vow. the Spirit seemed to lay stress upon that idea in the test, When You Search for Me With All Your Heart. the question of when,that is, of the present time, seemed to fall heavily into my heart. i told the lord that i should take him at his word; that he could not lie and that therefore I was sure that he heard my prayer and that He would be found of me...I walked quietly toward the village and so perfectly quiet was my mind that it seemed as if all nature listened, it was on the 10th of Oct, and a very pleasant day. i had gone into the woods immediately after a early breakfast and when i returned to the village i found it was dinner time. yet i had been wholly unconscious of the time that had passed; it appeared to me that i had been gone from the village but a short time....
i went to my diner and found i had no appetite to eat. i then went to the office and found that Squire W====had gone to dinner.I took down my bass viol and, as i was accustomed to do, began to play and sing some pieces of sacred music. but as soon as i began to sing those sacred words, i began to weep. it seemed as if my heart was all liquid and my feelings were in such a state that i could not hear my own voice in singing without causing my sensibility to overflow. i wondered at this, and tried to suppress my tears, but could not. i put up my instrument and stopped singing.
*64 after dinner we were engaged in removing our books and furniture to another office. we were busy in this and had but little conversation all the afternoon.my mind,however, remained in that profoundly tranquil state. there was a great sweetness and tenderness in my thoughts and feeling. everything appeared to be going right and nothing seemed to ruffle or disturb me in the least.
just before evening the thought took possession of my mind, that as soon as i was left alone in the new office, i would try to pray again - that i was not going to abandon thee subject of religion and give it up, at any rate and therefore, although i no longer had any concern about my soul. still i would continue to pray.
by evening we got the books and furniture adjusted and i made up, in an open fireplace, a good fire, hoping to spend thee evening alone, just as dark Squire W---, seeing that everything was adjusted, bade me good-night and went to his home. i had accompanied him to the door and as i closed the door and turned around, my heart seemed to be liquid within me. all my feelings seemed to rise and flow out and the utterance of my heart was, 'I WANT TO POUR MY WHOLE SOUL OUT TO GOD. the rising of my soul was so great that i rushed into the room back of the front office, to pray.
there was no fire and no light,in the room; nevertheless it appeared to me as if it were perfectly light. as i went in and shut the door after me, it seemed as if I met the Lord Jesus Christ face to face. it did not occur to me then, nor did it for some time afterward, that it was wholly a mental state. on the contrary,it seemed to me that i saw Him as i would see any other man. he said nothing, but looked at me in such a manner as to break me right down at his feet. i have always since regarded this as a most remarkable state of mind; for it seemed to me a reality, that He stood before me and i fell down at His
*65 feet and poured out my soul to Him. I wept aloud like a child and made such confessions as i could with a choked utterance. it seemed to me that I bathed His feet with my tears and yet i had no distinct impression that i touched Him, that i recollect.
i must have continued in this state for a good while, but my mind was too much absorbed with the interview to recollect anything that i said. but I know,as soon as my mind became calm enough to break off from the interview, I returned to the front office and found that the fire that i had made of large wood was nearly burned out. but as i turned and was about to take a seat by the fire, i received a mighty baptism of the Holy ghost. without any expectation of it, without ever having the thought in my mind that there was any such thing for me, without any recollection that i had ever heard the thing mentioned by any person in the world,the Holy Spirit descended upon my in a manner that seemed to go through me,body and soul. i could feel the impression, like a wave of electricity, going through and through me. indeed,it seemed to come in waves and waves of liquid love; for i could not express it in any other way. it seemed like the very breath of God, i can recollect distinctly that it seemed to fan me, like immense wings.
no words can express the wonderful love hat was shed abroad in my heart. i wept aloud with joy and love and i do not know but I should say, i literally bellowed out he unutterable gushings of my heart. these waves came over me and over me and over me, one after the other, until I recollect i cried out, 'i shall die if these waves continue to pass over me'. i said,'lord, I cannot bear any more' , yet I had no fear of death.
how long I continued in this state, with this baptism continuing to roll over me and go through me, I do not know. but i know it was late in the evening when a member of my choir - for i was the leader of the choir - came into the office to see
*66 me. he was a member of the church. he found me in this state of loud weeping and said to me, 'Mr. Finney, what ails you/ I could make him no answer for some time. he then said, 'are you in pain? i gathered myself up as best I could and replied, 'No, but so happy that i cannot live....
i soon fell asleep, but almost as soon awoke again on account of the great flow of the love of God that was in my heart. I was so filled with love that i could not sleep. soon I fell asleep again and awoke in the same manner. when i awoke, this temptation would return upon me and the love that seemed to e in my heart would abate; but as soon as I was asleep, it was so warm within me that i would immediately awake. thus i continued till, late at night. I obtained some sound repose.
when I awoke in the morning the sun had risen and was pouring a clear light into my room. words cannot express the impression that this sunlight made upon me. instantly the baptism that i had received the night before returned upon me in the same manner. I arose upon my knees in the bed and wept aloud with joy and remained for some time too much overwhelmed with the baptism of the Spirit to do anything but pour out my soul to God. it seemed as if this morning's baptism was accompanied with a gentle reproof and the Spirit seemed to say to me, 'Will you doubt? will you doubt? I cried, 'No! i will not doubt; i cannot doubt'. He then cleared the subject up so much to my mind that it was in fact impossible for me to doubt that the Spirit of God had taken possession of my soul.
in this state i was taught the doctrine of justification by faith, as a present experience. that doctrine had never taken any such possession of my mind that i had ever viewed it distinctly as a fundamental doctrine of the gospel. indeed, I did not know at all what it meant in the proper sense. but i could now see and understand what was meant by the passage,
*67 'Being justified by faith we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ'. I could see that the moment I believed, while up in the woods, all sense of condemnation had entirely dropped out of my mind and that from that moment i could not feel a sense of guilt or condemnation by any effort that i could make. my sense of guilt was gone; my sins were gone; and I do not thin I felt any more sense of guilt that if i never had sinned.
by the Spirit of God Finney came under deep conviction, learned god's plan of salvation and was born again of the Spirit; then without his knowledge of any such experience was filled to overflowing with that Spirit!
6.28.2018 TFTS - Oswald Chambers - The Highest Life
*52 the Bible college life at Dunoon 'based on the simplicity of daring faith in God for the provision of needs' became the groundwork of C's life of faith and obedience. he came to know by experience that God answers prayer. likewise there was created in his innermost being a huger and thirst that only the living God can satisfy. that deep desire, almost fathomless, he struggled to express in his diary;
'the Holy Spirit must anoint me for the work , fir me and so vividly convince me that such and such a way is mine to aim at, or i shall not go, I will not, I dare not; I shall just be content to earn my living - but, no, that cannot be.. from my very childhood the persuasion has been that of a work, strange and great, an experience deep and peculiar, it has haunted me ever and ever.... here is the lamb and the wood, but where is the fire? nothing but the fire of the most Holy Spirit of God can make the offering holy and unblameable and acceptable i His sight'.
it was at that time, when his 'soul was in turmoil', that he wrote these lines:
Let me climb, let me climb, I'm sure i've time
'ere the mist comes up from the sea.
let me climb in time to the height sublime,
let me reach where I long to be.
climbing in the Spirit is accomplished by kneeling and not by running; by surrender and not by determination. despair of self leads to utter desperation; but beyond these mists lies the sunshine of God's presence. many a soul will turn back to accustomed marshlands of defeat rather than brave the
*53 fogs of frustration, but the mountain peaks rise high above the rain and gloom.
this pattern in the crisis of the deeper life, followed by its wide outreach, is almost identical with the experience of countless others of God's children. first, there is the huger of heart, often followed y a sense of desperation that leads to utter surrender of self. thereafter there is the meeting of the soul with God in whatever manner the Almighty is pleased to reveal himself to the desperate seeker who, like Jacob at Jabbok, Will Not Let Him Go Until There Is Blessing...
'I was in Dunnon College as a tutor in philosophy, he recalled, when Dr. F. B. Meyer came and spoke about the Holy Spirit. I determined to have all that was going and went to my room and asked God simply and definitely for the baptism of the HS, whatever that meant. from that day on for 4 years nothing but the overruling grace of God and kindness of friends dept me out of an asylum.
God used me during those years for the conversion of souls, but I had no conscious communion with Him. the Bible was the dullest, most uninteresting book in existence and the sense of depravity, the vileness and bad-motivedness of my nature, was terrific. i see now that God was taking me by the light of the Holy Spirit and His Word through every ramification of my being.
the last 3 months of those years things reached a climax, I was getting very desperate. I knew no one who had what i wanted; in fact I did not know what i did want. but i
*54 knew that if what i had was all the Christianity there was, the thing was a fraud. then Luke 11.13 got hold of me - 'If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy spirit to them that ask Him?
but how could I, bad motivated as I was, possibly ask for the gift of the Holy Spirit? then it was borne in upon me that i had to claim the gift from God on the authority of Jesus Christ and testify to having done so. but the though came - if you claim the gift of the HS on the word of Jesus Christ and testify to it, God will make it known to those who know you best how bad you are in heart. and I was not willing to be a fool for Christ's sake. but those of you who know the experience, know very well how god brings one to the point of utter despair, and I got to the place where I did not care whether everyone knew how bad I was; I cared for nothing on earth, saving to get out of my present condition.
at a little meeting held during a mission in Dunoon, a well known lady was asked to take the after meeting. she did not speak, but set us to prayer and then sang 'touch me again, Lord'. I felt nothing, but I knew emphatically my time had come and I rose to my feet. i had no vision of god, only a sheer dogged determination to take god at His word and to prove this thing for myself and I stood up and said so.
that was bad enough, but what followed was 10 times worse. after I had sat down the lady worker, who knew me well, said: 'that is very good of our brother, he has spoken like that as an example to the rest of you.
I got again and said: 'I got up for no one (else's) sake, I got up for my own sake; either Christianity is a downright fraud, or I have not got hold of the right end of the stick'. and then and there I claimed the gift of the Holy Spirit in dogged committal on Luke 11.13.
*55 I had no vision of heaven or of angels, I had nothing. I was as dry and empty as ever, no power or realization of God, no witness of the Holy Spirit. then i was asked to speak at a meeting and 40 souls came out to the front. did i praise God? No, I was terrified and left them to the workers and went to Mr. MacGregor 9 a friend) and told him what had happened , and he said: 'Don't you remember claiming the HS as a gift on the word of Jesus and that He said: 'Ye shall receive power...? 'this is the power from on high'. then lie a flash something happened inside me and i saw that i had been wanting power in my own hand, so to speak, that i might say - Look what i have by putting my all on the altar.
if the 4 previous years had been hell on earth, these 5 years have truly been heaven on earth. Glory be to God, the last aching abyss of the human heart is filled to overflowing with the love of God. love is the beginning, love is the middle and love is the end. after he comes in, all you see is 'Jesus only, Jesus ever'.
when you know what God has done for you, the power and the tyranny of sin is gone and the radiant, unspeakable emancipation of the indwelling Christ has come and when you see men and women who should be princes and presses with God bound up by the show of things - oh,you begin to understand what the apostle meant when he said he wished himself accursed from Christ that men might be saved!
it was with implicit obedience that OC learned, on the basis of Luke 11.13, that By Faith we receive the fullness of God's Spirit, just as by faith we receive the Lord Jesus as Savior.
and what did the immediacy of God mean in the life of Oswald Chambers? he himself said again and again, 'It is no wonder that i talk so much about an altered disposition: God altered mine; I was there when He did it...
*56 as was true of the prophets of old, Chambers was a man of God, but not unapproachable nor other-worldly. he was personable and practical and yet a dreamer, a thinker with a long range view. a pastor wrote of him: 'In friendly intercourse he was one of the most genial and attractive of men. the children in the home love him and his boyish ways....yet he was a might unflinching messenger of God. he never obtruded his views upon others, bu when men sought further knowledge, they soon found they were in the presence of a master mind.
he was a man of prayer, interceding, imploring and believing. he had rare insight into the meaning of the Scripture and from this came pointed and practical preaching. derogatory speaking on the part of others did not deflect his spirit from following his Savior, who likewise knew what is meant to be 'despised and rejected of men'. he was literally 'a bond slave of Jesus Christ' and yet none knew more glorious liberty as a child of God.
'the Holy Spirit must anoint me for the work , fir me and so vividly convince me that such and such a way is mine to aim at, or i shall not go, I will not, I dare not; I shall just be content to earn my living - but, no, that cannot be.. from my very childhood the persuasion has been that of a work, strange and great, an experience deep and peculiar, it has haunted me ever and ever.... here is the lamb and the wood, but where is the fire? nothing but the fire of the most Holy Spirit of God can make the offering holy and unblameable and acceptable i His sight'.
it was at that time, when his 'soul was in turmoil', that he wrote these lines:
Let me climb, let me climb, I'm sure i've time
'ere the mist comes up from the sea.
let me climb in time to the height sublime,
let me reach where I long to be.
climbing in the Spirit is accomplished by kneeling and not by running; by surrender and not by determination. despair of self leads to utter desperation; but beyond these mists lies the sunshine of God's presence. many a soul will turn back to accustomed marshlands of defeat rather than brave the
*53 fogs of frustration, but the mountain peaks rise high above the rain and gloom.
this pattern in the crisis of the deeper life, followed by its wide outreach, is almost identical with the experience of countless others of God's children. first, there is the huger of heart, often followed y a sense of desperation that leads to utter surrender of self. thereafter there is the meeting of the soul with God in whatever manner the Almighty is pleased to reveal himself to the desperate seeker who, like Jacob at Jabbok, Will Not Let Him Go Until There Is Blessing...
'I was in Dunnon College as a tutor in philosophy, he recalled, when Dr. F. B. Meyer came and spoke about the Holy Spirit. I determined to have all that was going and went to my room and asked God simply and definitely for the baptism of the HS, whatever that meant. from that day on for 4 years nothing but the overruling grace of God and kindness of friends dept me out of an asylum.
God used me during those years for the conversion of souls, but I had no conscious communion with Him. the Bible was the dullest, most uninteresting book in existence and the sense of depravity, the vileness and bad-motivedness of my nature, was terrific. i see now that God was taking me by the light of the Holy Spirit and His Word through every ramification of my being.
the last 3 months of those years things reached a climax, I was getting very desperate. I knew no one who had what i wanted; in fact I did not know what i did want. but i
*54 knew that if what i had was all the Christianity there was, the thing was a fraud. then Luke 11.13 got hold of me - 'If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy spirit to them that ask Him?
but how could I, bad motivated as I was, possibly ask for the gift of the Holy Spirit? then it was borne in upon me that i had to claim the gift from God on the authority of Jesus Christ and testify to having done so. but the though came - if you claim the gift of the HS on the word of Jesus Christ and testify to it, God will make it known to those who know you best how bad you are in heart. and I was not willing to be a fool for Christ's sake. but those of you who know the experience, know very well how god brings one to the point of utter despair, and I got to the place where I did not care whether everyone knew how bad I was; I cared for nothing on earth, saving to get out of my present condition.
at a little meeting held during a mission in Dunoon, a well known lady was asked to take the after meeting. she did not speak, but set us to prayer and then sang 'touch me again, Lord'. I felt nothing, but I knew emphatically my time had come and I rose to my feet. i had no vision of god, only a sheer dogged determination to take god at His word and to prove this thing for myself and I stood up and said so.
that was bad enough, but what followed was 10 times worse. after I had sat down the lady worker, who knew me well, said: 'that is very good of our brother, he has spoken like that as an example to the rest of you.
I got again and said: 'I got up for no one (else's) sake, I got up for my own sake; either Christianity is a downright fraud, or I have not got hold of the right end of the stick'. and then and there I claimed the gift of the Holy Spirit in dogged committal on Luke 11.13.
*55 I had no vision of heaven or of angels, I had nothing. I was as dry and empty as ever, no power or realization of God, no witness of the Holy Spirit. then i was asked to speak at a meeting and 40 souls came out to the front. did i praise God? No, I was terrified and left them to the workers and went to Mr. MacGregor 9 a friend) and told him what had happened , and he said: 'Don't you remember claiming the HS as a gift on the word of Jesus and that He said: 'Ye shall receive power...? 'this is the power from on high'. then lie a flash something happened inside me and i saw that i had been wanting power in my own hand, so to speak, that i might say - Look what i have by putting my all on the altar.
if the 4 previous years had been hell on earth, these 5 years have truly been heaven on earth. Glory be to God, the last aching abyss of the human heart is filled to overflowing with the love of God. love is the beginning, love is the middle and love is the end. after he comes in, all you see is 'Jesus only, Jesus ever'.
when you know what God has done for you, the power and the tyranny of sin is gone and the radiant, unspeakable emancipation of the indwelling Christ has come and when you see men and women who should be princes and presses with God bound up by the show of things - oh,you begin to understand what the apostle meant when he said he wished himself accursed from Christ that men might be saved!
it was with implicit obedience that OC learned, on the basis of Luke 11.13, that By Faith we receive the fullness of God's Spirit, just as by faith we receive the Lord Jesus as Savior.
and what did the immediacy of God mean in the life of Oswald Chambers? he himself said again and again, 'It is no wonder that i talk so much about an altered disposition: God altered mine; I was there when He did it...
*56 as was true of the prophets of old, Chambers was a man of God, but not unapproachable nor other-worldly. he was personable and practical and yet a dreamer, a thinker with a long range view. a pastor wrote of him: 'In friendly intercourse he was one of the most genial and attractive of men. the children in the home love him and his boyish ways....yet he was a might unflinching messenger of God. he never obtruded his views upon others, bu when men sought further knowledge, they soon found they were in the presence of a master mind.
he was a man of prayer, interceding, imploring and believing. he had rare insight into the meaning of the Scripture and from this came pointed and practical preaching. derogatory speaking on the part of others did not deflect his spirit from following his Savior, who likewise knew what is meant to be 'despised and rejected of men'. he was literally 'a bond slave of Jesus Christ' and yet none knew more glorious liberty as a child of God.
Wednesday, June 27, 2018
6.27.2018 TFTS - Amy Carmichael: The Radiant Life
*43 Amy Carmichael first met the living Lord on the streets of Belfast. she was just a girl then, in her teens. the meeting with the Savior was sudden and startling, wholly unexpected. in god Cord, the autobiographical account of the background and the building of the Christian home for girls and boys at Dohnavur in South India, she relates the meeting, as important in her life as was the revelation of the Lord Jesus to Saul of Tarsus on the way to Damascus.
'it was a dull Sun morning, she recalled, in Belfast. my brothers and sisters and I were returning with our mother from church when we met a poor pathetic old woman who was carrying a heavy bundle. we had never seen such a thing in Presbyterian Belfast on Sunday , and, moved by sudden pity, my brothers and I turned with her, relieved her of the bundle ,k took her by her arms as though they had been handles and helped her along. this meant facing all the respectable people who were, like ourselves,on their way home. it was a horrid moment. we were only 2 boys and a girl and not at all exalted Christians. we hated doing it, crimson all over (at least we felt crimson, soul and body of us) we plodded on, a wet wind blowing us about and blowing, too, he rags of that poor old woman, till she seemed lie a bundle of feathers and we unhappily mixed up with them. but just as we passed a fountain
*44 recently built near the kerbstone, this mighty phrase was suddenly flashed as it were through the grey drizzle;
'Gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; every man's work shall be made manifest; for the day shall declare it because it shall be revealed by fire and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. if any man's work abide...'
IF ANY MAN'S WORK ABIDE - I turned to see the voice that spoke with me. the fountain, the muddy street, the people with their politely surprised faces, all this I saw, but nothing else. the blinding flash had come and gone, the ordinary was all about us. we went on. i said nothing to anyone, but I knew that something had happened that had changed life's values. nothing could ever matter again but the things that wee eternal'.
that afternoon the 18 year old Amy shut herself in her room, talked to God and settled once and for all the pattern of her future life. Amy had found the Lord Jesus as her personal Savior 2 years before when a student at school in Harrogate, North Ireland. in the moments of quiet at the conclusion of an evangelistic meeting, the good Shepherd, she said, 'answered the prayers of my father and mother and many other loving ones and drew me, even me, into His fold'.
at the age of 19 she attended a convention in Glasgow. there she heard the 'Keswick testimony' of the life of victory by the Holy Spirit for the first time. she recalled:
'I had been longing for months, perhaps years, to know how one could live a holy life and a life that would help others. I came to that meeting half hoping,half fearing. would there be anything for me? I don't remember feeling there was anything (my fault) in either of the 2 addresses. the fog in the hall seemed to soak into home. my soul was in a fog. then the chair man rose for the last prayer. perhaps the previous address had been about peter walking on the water and perhaps it had closed with the words of Jude 24, for the one who
*45 prayed began like this, 'O Lord, we know Thou art able to keep is from falling'. those words found me. it was as if they were alight and they shone for me.
in exaltation of mind and spirit she left the meeting and went with her hostess to a restaurant for lunch. 'The mutton chop wasn't properly cooked and somebody said so', wrote Amy Carmichael. 'I remembered wondering, 'whatever does it matter about mutton chops? O Lord, We Know Thou Are Able To Keep Us From Falling'.
assurance of salvation at Harrogate ('the one watered moment in an arid 3 years), awareness of eternal values by the Holy Spirit at Belfast ('something had happened that had changed life's values') and the actuality of the new life in Christ at Glasgow ('Thou are able to keep us from falling') - these were the spiritual milestones of Amy Carmichael's awakening and preparation for her long fruitful service for the Lord Jesus.
early did this Irish girl learn the sensitivity to the Holy Spirit that is indispensable in a close walk with god. still in her teens she was led to Christian service in a Belfast mission, 'the Welcome'. for some nights there were sols saved night after night, then suddenly the meetings went dead. as she prayed and searched her own heart she remembered 'a rollicking hour when we reached home after the meeting an, as usual, it was my fault. there was nothing wrong in the fun, But It Was Not The Time For It. I have never forgotten the shock of that discovery. Grieve not the Spirit, that was the word then, In His mercy he forgave and the work went on again'.
there was the implicit and wholehearted response to the call for foreign service, quite unthought of even the day before it came, on Jan 13, 1892. obedient to that call of God ye she was appointed the first missionary under the Keswick convention and within a few months went to japan. though her service
*46 there was brief she learned many lessons that were invaluable later in the 55 consecutive years that she served in India.
not long after she arrived in Japan, she learned the importance of simplicity of dress and appearance on the part of missionaries and the value of adaptability to the clothing and the standards of teh people among whom one had come to witness for the Savior.
it was a hare lesson, learned in a sad way. with her Christian fellow worker, misaki San, she had gone to visit an old lady who was ill. in response to Miss Carmichael's word, translated by Misaki San, the needy heart seemed just about to turn to the Savior when the lady noticed fur gloves on the missionary's hands and was distracted from the message. 'i went home, said the young missionary, 'took off my English clothes, put on my Japanese kimono and never again, I trust risked so very much for the sake of so very little....'
another valuable lesson cam out of that experience. said Miss Carmichael: 'the touch of that old lady on my fur gloves set free, though I never imagined it, thousands of hours of time; for the saving of tie is great when a company of people live for many years without having to spend any time in giving thought to their clothes. and it set fee hundreds of pounds; for the saving of money is also great, when at a stroke all the extras of dress are cut off, and nothing need by spent on them. and all this time and money saved has meant just so much the more to give to Him who gave us all. but more than that, as i believe, it led to the opening of doors never opened before. it would have been impossible for one in foreign dress to go to the places to which I had to go if I were ever to discover the truth about things in India. and more, far more than that, it opened doors to hearts. if any question that, I can fall back on this: it made it just a little less easy for the great enemy to distract a soul who was drawing near to its Savior'.
*47 early in her missionary life she also learned the strength of the Strong One. a Buddhist neighbor in the Japanese village of Matsue was possessed by the 'Fox spirit', as they called it. the Japanese knew the reality of demon possession but had heard nothing of deliverance from that dreadful bondage. Miss C and Misaki San went uninvited to pray for a demon-possessed man, only to be driven away, but not before they had assured the wife that they would pray at home until her husband was delivered from the power of the Fox spirit. within an hour a messenger came to say that all the Foxes, 6 or them , were gone; and the next day the man, perfectly well, came with a branch of pomegranate flowers to express his appreciation for their prayers. some months later he died of malaria, peacefully, with his New Testament clasped in his hands. thus she learned in actual combat that 'greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world.
such was the beginning of her deep acquaintance with the lord and her preparation for service in India. one day in India, while sitting under a wide-spreading tree with her Tamil grammar and dictionary before her, she became conscious of the 'unfolding sense of a presence, a listener'. it seemed to her he looked for some to listen with Him, to listen to the voice of one's brother's blood crying to him from the ground. time ceased for the lady under the tree and she sat all that day in his presence. that day on the hillside influenced all the years that were to follow for Amy Carmichael and gave depth to them all.
when she was called by the Lover of little children to the rescuing of girls from the temple and later of boys in danger, few missionaries or Indian Christians were in sympathy with her. of this she wrote: 'Sometimes it was as if I saw the Lord Jesus Christ kneeling alone, as he knelt long ago under the olive trees. the trees were tamarid now, the tamarinds that i see as i look up from this writing. and the only thing that one who cared
*48 could do, was to go softly and keel down beside Him, so that He would not be alone in His sorrow over the little children'.
the sensitivity to spiritual and eternal values gave her not only insight to discern the presence of her lord. but also outer sight to 'see things as they are'. the publication of a volume by that name, Things As They Are, in 1903, caused tremendous stir in India and also in Britain: so much so that a committee on the field was appointed to ask her to return to England. she found, however, that the Lord of the Harvest overruled in her behalf when others misunderstood her obedience to marching orders and her understanding of the battle.
she had by the Holy Spirit a wonderful gift of teaching others to trust the Faithful One. when the First War brought great hardship and uncertainty to the work in Dohnavur there were opportunities to help the children learn the simplicity and sweetness of faith in god. in her 1915 diary we read:
'Oct 26. had children in field weeding. told them of need of money - a new idea to them. explained a little to older girls bout our way of working and what it involved of careful sensitiveness towards God. finally got them, an all, to the point of willingness to give today 9Festival Day) to weeding. girls splendid over it, children very sweet and good. inwardly prayed for a quick assurance from our Father that he was pleased. it would be like Him to do this.
Oct 27. mail in today and 50 from a friend of Irene Streeter, the soldier brother's money left to her. took letter up to field where children were weeding and we all praised God standing in shadow of cactus hedge. there was other money too - more in one mail than has come for many months. all much cheered and much awed too'.
the Spirit-filled life is a practical one. AC found it so. in the problem of guidance she learned to pray, to trust, to obey and not to look back.
*49 'when decisions have to be made, don't look back and wonder what I would have done. look up and light will come to do what our Lord and Master would have you do.
it may be that decisions which seem to change the character of the work will have to be made. but if the root principles which have governed us from the beginning are held fast, there will be no real change. the river may flow in a new channel, but it will be the same river.
if you hold fast to the resolve that in all things Christ as Lord shall have the pre-eminence, if you keep his will, His glory and His pleasure high above everything and if you continue in his love, loving one another as He has loved you, than all will be well, eternally well'.
Amy Carmichael had a singing heart. sensitive, artistic and radiant, her gift of song found expression in her poetry. few writers in our generation have had the ministry of pen in poetry and also prose as has AC of Dohnavur. these responses of her heart to trials of faith and triumphs of God's faithfulness have been printed and reprinted in every quarter of the globe.
from prayer that asks that I may be
sheltered from winds that beat on Thee,
from fearing when I should aspire,
from faltering when i should climb higher,
from silken self, o Captain, free
thy soldier who would follow Thee.
from subtle love of softening things,
from easy choices, weakenings,
not thus are spirits fortified,
not this way went the Crucified,
from all that dims Thy Calvary.
O Lamb of God, deliver me.
*50 give me the love that leads the way,
the faith that nothing can dismay,
the hope no disappointments tire,
the passion that will burn like fire,
let me not sink to be a clod:
Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.
and what shall we say of her books:
Things As They Are,
Meal in a Barrel,
God Cord,
If
Though the Mountains Shake to mention a few...
'it was a dull Sun morning, she recalled, in Belfast. my brothers and sisters and I were returning with our mother from church when we met a poor pathetic old woman who was carrying a heavy bundle. we had never seen such a thing in Presbyterian Belfast on Sunday , and, moved by sudden pity, my brothers and I turned with her, relieved her of the bundle ,k took her by her arms as though they had been handles and helped her along. this meant facing all the respectable people who were, like ourselves,on their way home. it was a horrid moment. we were only 2 boys and a girl and not at all exalted Christians. we hated doing it, crimson all over (at least we felt crimson, soul and body of us) we plodded on, a wet wind blowing us about and blowing, too, he rags of that poor old woman, till she seemed lie a bundle of feathers and we unhappily mixed up with them. but just as we passed a fountain
*44 recently built near the kerbstone, this mighty phrase was suddenly flashed as it were through the grey drizzle;
'Gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; every man's work shall be made manifest; for the day shall declare it because it shall be revealed by fire and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. if any man's work abide...'
IF ANY MAN'S WORK ABIDE - I turned to see the voice that spoke with me. the fountain, the muddy street, the people with their politely surprised faces, all this I saw, but nothing else. the blinding flash had come and gone, the ordinary was all about us. we went on. i said nothing to anyone, but I knew that something had happened that had changed life's values. nothing could ever matter again but the things that wee eternal'.
that afternoon the 18 year old Amy shut herself in her room, talked to God and settled once and for all the pattern of her future life. Amy had found the Lord Jesus as her personal Savior 2 years before when a student at school in Harrogate, North Ireland. in the moments of quiet at the conclusion of an evangelistic meeting, the good Shepherd, she said, 'answered the prayers of my father and mother and many other loving ones and drew me, even me, into His fold'.
at the age of 19 she attended a convention in Glasgow. there she heard the 'Keswick testimony' of the life of victory by the Holy Spirit for the first time. she recalled:
'I had been longing for months, perhaps years, to know how one could live a holy life and a life that would help others. I came to that meeting half hoping,half fearing. would there be anything for me? I don't remember feeling there was anything (my fault) in either of the 2 addresses. the fog in the hall seemed to soak into home. my soul was in a fog. then the chair man rose for the last prayer. perhaps the previous address had been about peter walking on the water and perhaps it had closed with the words of Jude 24, for the one who
*45 prayed began like this, 'O Lord, we know Thou art able to keep is from falling'. those words found me. it was as if they were alight and they shone for me.
in exaltation of mind and spirit she left the meeting and went with her hostess to a restaurant for lunch. 'The mutton chop wasn't properly cooked and somebody said so', wrote Amy Carmichael. 'I remembered wondering, 'whatever does it matter about mutton chops? O Lord, We Know Thou Are Able To Keep Us From Falling'.
assurance of salvation at Harrogate ('the one watered moment in an arid 3 years), awareness of eternal values by the Holy Spirit at Belfast ('something had happened that had changed life's values') and the actuality of the new life in Christ at Glasgow ('Thou are able to keep us from falling') - these were the spiritual milestones of Amy Carmichael's awakening and preparation for her long fruitful service for the Lord Jesus.
early did this Irish girl learn the sensitivity to the Holy Spirit that is indispensable in a close walk with god. still in her teens she was led to Christian service in a Belfast mission, 'the Welcome'. for some nights there were sols saved night after night, then suddenly the meetings went dead. as she prayed and searched her own heart she remembered 'a rollicking hour when we reached home after the meeting an, as usual, it was my fault. there was nothing wrong in the fun, But It Was Not The Time For It. I have never forgotten the shock of that discovery. Grieve not the Spirit, that was the word then, In His mercy he forgave and the work went on again'.
there was the implicit and wholehearted response to the call for foreign service, quite unthought of even the day before it came, on Jan 13, 1892. obedient to that call of God ye she was appointed the first missionary under the Keswick convention and within a few months went to japan. though her service
*46 there was brief she learned many lessons that were invaluable later in the 55 consecutive years that she served in India.
not long after she arrived in Japan, she learned the importance of simplicity of dress and appearance on the part of missionaries and the value of adaptability to the clothing and the standards of teh people among whom one had come to witness for the Savior.
it was a hare lesson, learned in a sad way. with her Christian fellow worker, misaki San, she had gone to visit an old lady who was ill. in response to Miss Carmichael's word, translated by Misaki San, the needy heart seemed just about to turn to the Savior when the lady noticed fur gloves on the missionary's hands and was distracted from the message. 'i went home, said the young missionary, 'took off my English clothes, put on my Japanese kimono and never again, I trust risked so very much for the sake of so very little....'
another valuable lesson cam out of that experience. said Miss Carmichael: 'the touch of that old lady on my fur gloves set free, though I never imagined it, thousands of hours of time; for the saving of tie is great when a company of people live for many years without having to spend any time in giving thought to their clothes. and it set fee hundreds of pounds; for the saving of money is also great, when at a stroke all the extras of dress are cut off, and nothing need by spent on them. and all this time and money saved has meant just so much the more to give to Him who gave us all. but more than that, as i believe, it led to the opening of doors never opened before. it would have been impossible for one in foreign dress to go to the places to which I had to go if I were ever to discover the truth about things in India. and more, far more than that, it opened doors to hearts. if any question that, I can fall back on this: it made it just a little less easy for the great enemy to distract a soul who was drawing near to its Savior'.
*47 early in her missionary life she also learned the strength of the Strong One. a Buddhist neighbor in the Japanese village of Matsue was possessed by the 'Fox spirit', as they called it. the Japanese knew the reality of demon possession but had heard nothing of deliverance from that dreadful bondage. Miss C and Misaki San went uninvited to pray for a demon-possessed man, only to be driven away, but not before they had assured the wife that they would pray at home until her husband was delivered from the power of the Fox spirit. within an hour a messenger came to say that all the Foxes, 6 or them , were gone; and the next day the man, perfectly well, came with a branch of pomegranate flowers to express his appreciation for their prayers. some months later he died of malaria, peacefully, with his New Testament clasped in his hands. thus she learned in actual combat that 'greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world.
such was the beginning of her deep acquaintance with the lord and her preparation for service in India. one day in India, while sitting under a wide-spreading tree with her Tamil grammar and dictionary before her, she became conscious of the 'unfolding sense of a presence, a listener'. it seemed to her he looked for some to listen with Him, to listen to the voice of one's brother's blood crying to him from the ground. time ceased for the lady under the tree and she sat all that day in his presence. that day on the hillside influenced all the years that were to follow for Amy Carmichael and gave depth to them all.
when she was called by the Lover of little children to the rescuing of girls from the temple and later of boys in danger, few missionaries or Indian Christians were in sympathy with her. of this she wrote: 'Sometimes it was as if I saw the Lord Jesus Christ kneeling alone, as he knelt long ago under the olive trees. the trees were tamarid now, the tamarinds that i see as i look up from this writing. and the only thing that one who cared
*48 could do, was to go softly and keel down beside Him, so that He would not be alone in His sorrow over the little children'.
the sensitivity to spiritual and eternal values gave her not only insight to discern the presence of her lord. but also outer sight to 'see things as they are'. the publication of a volume by that name, Things As They Are, in 1903, caused tremendous stir in India and also in Britain: so much so that a committee on the field was appointed to ask her to return to England. she found, however, that the Lord of the Harvest overruled in her behalf when others misunderstood her obedience to marching orders and her understanding of the battle.
she had by the Holy Spirit a wonderful gift of teaching others to trust the Faithful One. when the First War brought great hardship and uncertainty to the work in Dohnavur there were opportunities to help the children learn the simplicity and sweetness of faith in god. in her 1915 diary we read:
'Oct 26. had children in field weeding. told them of need of money - a new idea to them. explained a little to older girls bout our way of working and what it involved of careful sensitiveness towards God. finally got them, an all, to the point of willingness to give today 9Festival Day) to weeding. girls splendid over it, children very sweet and good. inwardly prayed for a quick assurance from our Father that he was pleased. it would be like Him to do this.
Oct 27. mail in today and 50 from a friend of Irene Streeter, the soldier brother's money left to her. took letter up to field where children were weeding and we all praised God standing in shadow of cactus hedge. there was other money too - more in one mail than has come for many months. all much cheered and much awed too'.
the Spirit-filled life is a practical one. AC found it so. in the problem of guidance she learned to pray, to trust, to obey and not to look back.
*49 'when decisions have to be made, don't look back and wonder what I would have done. look up and light will come to do what our Lord and Master would have you do.
it may be that decisions which seem to change the character of the work will have to be made. but if the root principles which have governed us from the beginning are held fast, there will be no real change. the river may flow in a new channel, but it will be the same river.
if you hold fast to the resolve that in all things Christ as Lord shall have the pre-eminence, if you keep his will, His glory and His pleasure high above everything and if you continue in his love, loving one another as He has loved you, than all will be well, eternally well'.
Amy Carmichael had a singing heart. sensitive, artistic and radiant, her gift of song found expression in her poetry. few writers in our generation have had the ministry of pen in poetry and also prose as has AC of Dohnavur. these responses of her heart to trials of faith and triumphs of God's faithfulness have been printed and reprinted in every quarter of the globe.
from prayer that asks that I may be
sheltered from winds that beat on Thee,
from fearing when I should aspire,
from faltering when i should climb higher,
from silken self, o Captain, free
thy soldier who would follow Thee.
from subtle love of softening things,
from easy choices, weakenings,
not thus are spirits fortified,
not this way went the Crucified,
from all that dims Thy Calvary.
O Lamb of God, deliver me.
*50 give me the love that leads the way,
the faith that nothing can dismay,
the hope no disappointments tire,
the passion that will burn like fire,
let me not sink to be a clod:
Make me Thy fuel, Flame of God.
and what shall we say of her books:
Things As They Are,
Meal in a Barrel,
God Cord,
If
Though the Mountains Shake to mention a few...
6.27.2018 TFTS - John Bunyan - The Unchained Life
*34 It could rightly be said that Bedford's tinker is one of those 'of whom the world is not worthy'. like the apostle Paul, who recognized himself as 'the prisoner of the Lord' and not of the Roman government, John Bunyan, though bound with chains for preaching the truth of God, was in spirit free. like Paul also, Bunyan's writings have lived through the centuries and wherever the Bible has gone in hundreds of translations Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress has followed.
*35 ...one day while pursuing his trade as a tinker he observed '3 or 4 poor women sitting at a door in the sun talking about the things of God' and being now willing to hear about God he drew near to listen. 'their talk was about a New Birth, the work of God in their hearts...they talked how God had visited their souls with His love in the Lord Jesus... Bunyan did not understand what they meant, but was 'greatly affected with their words'.
he made repeated efforts at self reformation. he was admired by others for his ceasing to swear. he thought that the task of ringing the church bell would gain merit for him, but he found no inner change; rather, he became apprehensive that the church bell might fall on him. now that he was married and had learned to read he began to go through the Scriptures, but found no understanding of them. he received help from a Mr. Gifford, a godly pastor in that area, who undoubtedly is represented in Pilgrim's Progress as Evangelist.
B was puzzled about the doctrine of election and troubled by blasphemous thoughts. he was given to frequent depressions and was under sore temptation by the enemy of mankind to 'sell Christ!' finally, in despair of gaining Christ, he said, 'let Him go if He will!'
thereafter, the statement in Hebrews 12.17 regarding Esau filled him with dismay, for the Scriptures said: 'ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected; for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears'.
*36 B would gain brief encouragement by remembering that Peter repented and was received back by the Savior; then the dreadful words about Esau would dash him to the ground. there was nothing on earth that he desired so much as assurance of forgiveness and salvation. but where could it be found?
John 6.37 - 'and him that cometh to me, I will in no wise cast out' - was the scriptural key that unlocked the bondage brought on by his blasphemy. it sweetly visited his soul and he said: 'Oh! the comfort that i found from this word, In No Wise! as if he had said, by no means, for nothing, whatever he hath done. but Satan would greatly labour to pull this promise from me by telling me that Christ did not mean me and such as i, but sinners of a lower rank, that had not done as I had done. but I would answer him again, 'satan, there is in these words no such exception: but Him That Cometh, Him, Any Him, Him That h To Me. I will in no wise cast out....' if ever Satan and I did strive for any word of God in all my life, it was for this good word of Christ; He at one end and I at the other. oh! what work we made! it was for this in John, I say, that we did so tug and strive; he pulled and I pulled; but, God be praised, I overcame him; I got sweetness from it'.
although at long length B had deep inner assurance of acceptance with God, he was still unsettled in his mind and deeply troubled by that Scripture about Esau. quietly and painstakingly the Spirit of god taught him that Esau despised the birthright and afterward was refused the blessing. thus he learned that 'the birthright signified regeneration and the blessing the eternal inheritance....' that those who despise regeneration will be denied heaven he understood correctly.
other Scripture also disturbed him such as Hebrews 10.26; 'for if we sin willfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins'. he learned, however, that his sin was not that open
*37 denial of the Savior and casting off His commandments and thereby he was comforted.
the crisis of the deeper life came to Bunyan one day as he was walking in the fields. 'suddenly, he said, this sentence fell upon my soul, Thy Righteousness Is In Heaven. and me thought, with awe, I saw, with the eyes of my soul, Jesus Christ at God's right hand; there, i say, was my righteousness, so that wherever i was, or whatever i was doing, god could not say of me, he wants my righteousness, for that was just before him. I also saw, moreover, that it was not my good frame of heart that made my righteousness better, nor yet my bad frame that made my righteousness worse; for my righteousness was Jesus Christ Himself, 'the same yesterday, today and forever'. hebrews 13.8
forcefully and with finality the Holy Spirit presented to B the reality of the risen Savior who 'is made unto us wisdom and righteousness and sanctification and redemption.' therefore with delight he could say:
'Now did my chains fall off my legs indeed I was loosed from my afflictions and irons; my temptations also fled away; so that from that time those dreadful scriptures of God left off to trouble me....
oh! me thought, Christ! Christ! there was nothing but Christ that was before my eyes. i was not now only for looking upon this and the other benefits of Christ apart, as of his blood, burial or resurrection, but considering him as a whole Christ, as He in whom all these and all other virtues, relations offices and operations met together and that he sat on the right hand of God in heaven it was glorious to me to see his exultation and the worth and prevalency of all His benefits....'
thus it was that B earned the wonderful reality of 'the life that is Christ'. Ephesians 5.30 became 'a sweet word' to him: 'for we are members of His body, of his flesh and of
*38 His bones'. he could say: 'further, the Lord did also lead me into the mystery of union with the Son of God...by this also was my faith in Him, as my righteousness, the more confirmed in me; for if He and I were one, then His righteousness was mine, His merits mine, his victory also mine. now i could see myself in heaven and earth at once; in heaven by my Christ, by my head, by me righteousness and life, though on earth by me body and person.
....and what were the results of Bunyan's being unchained from his doubts and fears? in his Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners, which ranks with Augustine's Confessions as among the best spiritual chronicles of that kind, he tells of many results. among them he list Grace that could keep him in deepest difficulties, Insight into the Scriptures, No Fear of death, and Assurance of his Lord's presence with him and a Fruitful Service for the Savior both in the pulpit and in the prison.
'I never saw such heights and depths in grace and love and mercy, he declared. 'I had 2 or 3 times at or about my deliverance from this temptation, such strange apprehensions of the grace of God, that i could hardly bear up under it and it was so out of measure amazing, when I thought it could reach me, that i do think if that sense of it had abode long upon me it would have made me incapable for business'.
whereas before he had been perplexed with unbelief, blasphemy and hardness of heart, he could say, 'now was God and Christ continually before my face....the glory of the holiness of God did at this time break me to pieces...'
he added, when facing a deep testing, 'As I was sitting by the fire I suddenly felt this word to sound in my heart: I Must Go To Jesus. at this my former darkness and atheism fled away,
*39 and the blessed things of heaven were set in my view...that night was a good night to me, I have had but few better; I long for the company of some of god's people, that i might imp0art unto them what God had showed me. Christ was a precious Christ to my soul that night; I could scarce lie in my bed for joy and peace and triumph, through Christ.
the fears that had beset him about death were banished and he could testify: 'I saw myself within the arms of grace and mercy and though I was before afraid to think of a dying hour, yet, now I cried, Let me die; now death was lovely and beautiful in my sight, for I saw we shall never live indeed until we be gone to the other world... God Himself is the portion of His saints. this i saw and wondered at, but cannot tell you what i saw'.
his neighbors and friends were aware of a great change in his life and urged him to preach the Word to them and to others. he was timid to do so but then was persuaded that God had given him the ministry of preaching and teaching. at first his message was altogether about sin and the Savior. '...the terrors of the law and guilt from my transgressions lay heavy on my conscience; i preached what i felt, what I smartingly did feel....indeed, I have been as one sent to them from the dead; I went myself in chains, to preached to them in chains and carried that fire in my own conscience that i persuaded them to be aware of'.
then his preaching took on more of an exaltation of 'Jesus Christ in all His offices, relations and benefits unto the world' then he began to teach 'the mystery of the union of Christ'. after 5 years of fruitful ministry, in which many found the Savior, he was imprisoned; but during those 2 terms in Bedford Jail he completed the immortal allegories of Pilgrim's Progress and The Holy War.
the Scriptures also were wonderful to me, he stated earnestly after he had learned the reality of union with the
*40 risen Savior ; 'I saw that the truth and verity of them were the keys of the kingdom of Heaven'. while in prison he could write: 'I never had in all my life so great an inlet into the Word of God as now: those Scriptures that i saw nothing in before are made in this place and state to shine before me; Jesus Christ also was never more real and apparent than now....
'I never knew what it was for God to stand by me at all times and every offer of satan to afflict me, as I have found him since i came in hither; for, lo! as fears have presented themselves, so have supports and encouragements; yea, when i have started even as it were at nothing else but my shadow, yet God, as being every tender of me. hath not suffered me to be molested, but would with one Scripture or another strengthen me against all; insomuch that i have often said, were it lawful I could pray for greater trouble for greater comfort.sake'....
*35 ...one day while pursuing his trade as a tinker he observed '3 or 4 poor women sitting at a door in the sun talking about the things of God' and being now willing to hear about God he drew near to listen. 'their talk was about a New Birth, the work of God in their hearts...they talked how God had visited their souls with His love in the Lord Jesus... Bunyan did not understand what they meant, but was 'greatly affected with their words'.
he made repeated efforts at self reformation. he was admired by others for his ceasing to swear. he thought that the task of ringing the church bell would gain merit for him, but he found no inner change; rather, he became apprehensive that the church bell might fall on him. now that he was married and had learned to read he began to go through the Scriptures, but found no understanding of them. he received help from a Mr. Gifford, a godly pastor in that area, who undoubtedly is represented in Pilgrim's Progress as Evangelist.
B was puzzled about the doctrine of election and troubled by blasphemous thoughts. he was given to frequent depressions and was under sore temptation by the enemy of mankind to 'sell Christ!' finally, in despair of gaining Christ, he said, 'let Him go if He will!'
thereafter, the statement in Hebrews 12.17 regarding Esau filled him with dismay, for the Scriptures said: 'ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected; for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears'.
*36 B would gain brief encouragement by remembering that Peter repented and was received back by the Savior; then the dreadful words about Esau would dash him to the ground. there was nothing on earth that he desired so much as assurance of forgiveness and salvation. but where could it be found?
John 6.37 - 'and him that cometh to me, I will in no wise cast out' - was the scriptural key that unlocked the bondage brought on by his blasphemy. it sweetly visited his soul and he said: 'Oh! the comfort that i found from this word, In No Wise! as if he had said, by no means, for nothing, whatever he hath done. but Satan would greatly labour to pull this promise from me by telling me that Christ did not mean me and such as i, but sinners of a lower rank, that had not done as I had done. but I would answer him again, 'satan, there is in these words no such exception: but Him That Cometh, Him, Any Him, Him That h To Me. I will in no wise cast out....' if ever Satan and I did strive for any word of God in all my life, it was for this good word of Christ; He at one end and I at the other. oh! what work we made! it was for this in John, I say, that we did so tug and strive; he pulled and I pulled; but, God be praised, I overcame him; I got sweetness from it'.
although at long length B had deep inner assurance of acceptance with God, he was still unsettled in his mind and deeply troubled by that Scripture about Esau. quietly and painstakingly the Spirit of god taught him that Esau despised the birthright and afterward was refused the blessing. thus he learned that 'the birthright signified regeneration and the blessing the eternal inheritance....' that those who despise regeneration will be denied heaven he understood correctly.
other Scripture also disturbed him such as Hebrews 10.26; 'for if we sin willfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins'. he learned, however, that his sin was not that open
*37 denial of the Savior and casting off His commandments and thereby he was comforted.
the crisis of the deeper life came to Bunyan one day as he was walking in the fields. 'suddenly, he said, this sentence fell upon my soul, Thy Righteousness Is In Heaven. and me thought, with awe, I saw, with the eyes of my soul, Jesus Christ at God's right hand; there, i say, was my righteousness, so that wherever i was, or whatever i was doing, god could not say of me, he wants my righteousness, for that was just before him. I also saw, moreover, that it was not my good frame of heart that made my righteousness better, nor yet my bad frame that made my righteousness worse; for my righteousness was Jesus Christ Himself, 'the same yesterday, today and forever'. hebrews 13.8
forcefully and with finality the Holy Spirit presented to B the reality of the risen Savior who 'is made unto us wisdom and righteousness and sanctification and redemption.' therefore with delight he could say:
'Now did my chains fall off my legs indeed I was loosed from my afflictions and irons; my temptations also fled away; so that from that time those dreadful scriptures of God left off to trouble me....
oh! me thought, Christ! Christ! there was nothing but Christ that was before my eyes. i was not now only for looking upon this and the other benefits of Christ apart, as of his blood, burial or resurrection, but considering him as a whole Christ, as He in whom all these and all other virtues, relations offices and operations met together and that he sat on the right hand of God in heaven it was glorious to me to see his exultation and the worth and prevalency of all His benefits....'
thus it was that B earned the wonderful reality of 'the life that is Christ'. Ephesians 5.30 became 'a sweet word' to him: 'for we are members of His body, of his flesh and of
*38 His bones'. he could say: 'further, the Lord did also lead me into the mystery of union with the Son of God...by this also was my faith in Him, as my righteousness, the more confirmed in me; for if He and I were one, then His righteousness was mine, His merits mine, his victory also mine. now i could see myself in heaven and earth at once; in heaven by my Christ, by my head, by me righteousness and life, though on earth by me body and person.
....and what were the results of Bunyan's being unchained from his doubts and fears? in his Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners, which ranks with Augustine's Confessions as among the best spiritual chronicles of that kind, he tells of many results. among them he list Grace that could keep him in deepest difficulties, Insight into the Scriptures, No Fear of death, and Assurance of his Lord's presence with him and a Fruitful Service for the Savior both in the pulpit and in the prison.
'I never saw such heights and depths in grace and love and mercy, he declared. 'I had 2 or 3 times at or about my deliverance from this temptation, such strange apprehensions of the grace of God, that i could hardly bear up under it and it was so out of measure amazing, when I thought it could reach me, that i do think if that sense of it had abode long upon me it would have made me incapable for business'.
whereas before he had been perplexed with unbelief, blasphemy and hardness of heart, he could say, 'now was God and Christ continually before my face....the glory of the holiness of God did at this time break me to pieces...'
he added, when facing a deep testing, 'As I was sitting by the fire I suddenly felt this word to sound in my heart: I Must Go To Jesus. at this my former darkness and atheism fled away,
*39 and the blessed things of heaven were set in my view...that night was a good night to me, I have had but few better; I long for the company of some of god's people, that i might imp0art unto them what God had showed me. Christ was a precious Christ to my soul that night; I could scarce lie in my bed for joy and peace and triumph, through Christ.
the fears that had beset him about death were banished and he could testify: 'I saw myself within the arms of grace and mercy and though I was before afraid to think of a dying hour, yet, now I cried, Let me die; now death was lovely and beautiful in my sight, for I saw we shall never live indeed until we be gone to the other world... God Himself is the portion of His saints. this i saw and wondered at, but cannot tell you what i saw'.
his neighbors and friends were aware of a great change in his life and urged him to preach the Word to them and to others. he was timid to do so but then was persuaded that God had given him the ministry of preaching and teaching. at first his message was altogether about sin and the Savior. '...the terrors of the law and guilt from my transgressions lay heavy on my conscience; i preached what i felt, what I smartingly did feel....indeed, I have been as one sent to them from the dead; I went myself in chains, to preached to them in chains and carried that fire in my own conscience that i persuaded them to be aware of'.
then his preaching took on more of an exaltation of 'Jesus Christ in all His offices, relations and benefits unto the world' then he began to teach 'the mystery of the union of Christ'. after 5 years of fruitful ministry, in which many found the Savior, he was imprisoned; but during those 2 terms in Bedford Jail he completed the immortal allegories of Pilgrim's Progress and The Holy War.
the Scriptures also were wonderful to me, he stated earnestly after he had learned the reality of union with the
*40 risen Savior ; 'I saw that the truth and verity of them were the keys of the kingdom of Heaven'. while in prison he could write: 'I never had in all my life so great an inlet into the Word of God as now: those Scriptures that i saw nothing in before are made in this place and state to shine before me; Jesus Christ also was never more real and apparent than now....
'I never knew what it was for God to stand by me at all times and every offer of satan to afflict me, as I have found him since i came in hither; for, lo! as fears have presented themselves, so have supports and encouragements; yea, when i have started even as it were at nothing else but my shadow, yet God, as being every tender of me. hath not suffered me to be molested, but would with one Scripture or another strengthen me against all; insomuch that i have often said, were it lawful I could pray for greater trouble for greater comfort.sake'....
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